"I really didn't expect you to be this type of a doctor. I'm really disappointed" I said looking straight into his eyes. Even saying that I could hear my heartbreak. As much as I didn't want to say it, I felt like I had to.
A hospital in the middle...
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We got into the staff room, changed our clothes, and drove home. This time in separate cars as Beomgyu got his car from the hospital. Once we reached home, I prepared some food for us since we went through a lot today, so it's important to eat to gain our energy back. I finished eating and got ready for bed since I was exhausted.
I was sitting on my bed wearing my sleepwear, a black figure-hugging baby doll with white lace detail that reached my mid-thigh. I heard a knock on my door and when I opened it it was Beomgyu in his sweatpants shirtless. I felt my face heat up at the sight.
Again it took every nerve in me not to just smack my hand on his chest and feel his skin. He held up the massage oil, and right away, I knew he wanted me to massage his shoulder. It made me happy since that's an excuse for me to get to feel his skin against the palm of my hand without making me seem like a creep or a pervert.
"Oh yeah, come in", I said, stepping out of the way and he came into the room "lay down on the bed, on your stomach. I will go wash my hands."
He nodded, and I went out of the room to the bathroom and washed my hands. When I came back into my room, I saw him on my bed just like I told him, but then I realised he was looking at a picture frame on my nightstand.
"Ready?" I said and went and grabbed the massage oil.
"Is that your dad?" he asked. I started to massage his shoulder
"Yes," I said. It was when my parents first knew that they were having me. my mom was three weeks pregnant" I looked at the picture, and it was my dad back hugging my mom while holding her tummy as she held a sign that said 'Soon to be parents'
"Do you miss him?" he asked, and I froze. I felt tears build up my eyes, and my throat tightened. Beomgyu must have noticed it because he tried to sit up, but I just pushed him down and continued to massage his shoulder
"Sorry, I shouldn't have asked," he said, but I didn't say anything. I was scared I would speak up, and he might notice my voice change. I cleared my throat before speaking
"Yeah," I said. For the rest of the massage, it was quiet. Thankfully it wasn't uncomfortable. It was more peaceful and relaxing. By the end of it, I noticed Beomgyu's eyes were closed as his breathing slowed down. He must be sleeping.
I walked out of the room and went to wash my hands from the oil before coming back into the room, and I pulled the sheets and covered him. I brushed my fingers gently into his soft hair before turning around to leave. But just as I was about to walk, I felt him grab my hand.
"Stay," Beomgyu said. I turned around and saw him looking up at me. I could tell that he was sleepy.
"Beomgyu I-" I said, but he cut me off.
"Please just stay," He said as I felt his hand tighten its grip around mine in more of a protective manner.
"Don't do this. I can't," I said, looking at the ground as tears filled up my eyes. I tried to pull my hand away from his grip, but he didn't allow it. I didn't want him to see me cry. I know just having him inside of my house makes it hard for me but being with him in the same bed is just even harder. It's heartbreaking. All I want to do is just move one, but his presence doesn't allow me to do that.
