The Rise Of The Morningstar (Eng. Version)

Chapter 12 - A Supernatural Message

Chapter 12 - A Supernatural Message

I regained consciousness in a brightly lit room. My eyelids were closed, but the light was so bright I could see it through my lids. I heard a low whirring sound that seemed to come from far away. And a low purr that stood out clearly from the other background noises.

I blinked and opened my eyes to find a cat's sparkling eyes. Church. The tomcat had spread across my lap and seemed visibly content. His gray fur shone in the sunlight streaming through the infirmary windows.

"Clary," I heard a familiar voice say. I slowly turned my head to the side and spotted Adam sitting on a chair next to my bed. He seemed visibly relieved, his green eyes staring at me so intensely as if he feared I would otherwise vanish into thin air.

"Adam." My voice sounded oddly hoarse. I narrowed my eyes in confusion and sat up. It sounded like I had spent a long time screaming ... My body automatically ducked as all the memories came flooding back. With a gasp, I grabbed the edge of the bed to keep my balance. My other arm reflexively slid to my stomach, and I doubled over in pain.

"Clary, what's wrong?" Adam had risen from his chair in a second and was now standing next to me, his hand on my shoulder.

"Don't touch me," I growled, backing away from him as if he were the enemy. Of course, I knew that he wasn't to blame for all this, but I couldn't help it. I wanted no pity, no help, no insincere word from him.

I could tell from his eyes that he was hurt as he slowly withdrew his hand. Only then did I realize that I hardly knew him. How long had I been here? It had all passed in the blink of an eye and the only thing I knew about him was that he was from Toronto and had many siblings. And while he seemed like a nice boy, I hadn't spent much time with him, except for that afternoon in the conservatory. He could have been pretending to me all this time.

Only then did I spot Alec lying on the other bed to my right. His eyes were wide open and it seemed as if he had woken up from a deep sleep because he looked incredibly tired.

"Sorry," I murmured in his direction. "I didn't mean to wake you up." In one smooth movement, I swung my legs off the bed, my back to Adam. Church let out an unhappy meow as he landed like a feather on the ground. He gave me an offended look and ran away.

Alec gave a resigned shrug and sank back into his pillow. As I looked at him, a dark feeling spread through me. If it wasn't for me, this would never have happened to him. And that's exactly what Alec told me yesterday. Everything that happens today will be your fault. I felt my throat tighten and I couldn't breathe anymore. The pressure on my neck reminded me of the day Jonathan had attacked me through the vision in the gym. But this time Jonathan wasn't here. I am alone. Completely alone.

I pressed my lips together and closed my eyes for a moment to not burst into tears. All I could see was my mother lying wide-eyed in her own pool of blood. The image was burned into my brain, and I knew I would never get rid of it.

I wasn't allowed to show weakness. I couldn't lose my temper again. The one time with Jace had been enough. Of all the people in this Institute, he was the last who should have seen me like that. I had let my walls down, even if it was only for a short time. Something like this must never happen again. I was stronger than that. At least that's what I was trying to tell myself at this moment. I had to regain control. Never again.

"You can't go yet," I heard Adam say from afar. "Are you even listening to me?" He was standing right in front of me, his face shadowed by the sun.

"But I'm going," I replied, and my voice was a disaster. Shaky and hoarse, like I hadn't spoken in days. "How long have I been here?"