That's It For Tonight. (BoyxBoy) Complete.

Chapter 12.

Jacobs Pov

It has been three weeks since the incident with Rylan and I have been avoiding him like the plague. I just don’t know how to handle everything, I have never been in a similar situation and it’s hard for me to accept everything that has happened. I have never been in a relationship with anyone. Ever!

And I guess I’m afraid, I’m afraid that if this turns into something more than just fucking, I’m gonna get hurt in the end. I just don’t want someone that I like to leave me, I feel like a failure at everything else, the only thing that I have is my ego and my image. If I lose that, I’m gonna end up as a nobody. And I don’t want that.

The first two weeks Rylan had tried talking to me numerous of times but I just ignored him and walked away every time he tried to say something. He even came to my house, but I made River tell him that I wasn’t home and he had no choice but to leave.

I know I was being stupid and childish but I just couldn’t handle being in the same room as him, I would probably crumble at his feet. He made me feel things that I didn’t know I could even feel. And as hard as it is for me to admit, I really miss him. That stupid bastard. This is all his fault.

Especially because he hasn’t tried to talk to me for the past week, I guess he got tired of trying to get my attention and I don’t blame him. I didn’t even look at him the first two weeks, afraid that he might see me looking and know that everything that he had said about me liking him and wanting him were true.

Because they were true and I was afraid of letting him know that, I was afraid of letting him too close and I was afraid of getting too attached to him, which was the only reason why I was avoiding him now. Before it was about my pride and image, but now I was just afraid of the loss if he decided to leave me.

I know I could have anyone that I wanted but the problem was that for the last two weeks all I could think about was him and I hated it. I hated the fact that I had lost control over my feelings and fallen in love with him, of all people. He was the only guy that I had hated for years and now I was in love with him. For the past few days I had tried getting his attention by looking at him and I even tried to talk to him, but he just pretended like he didn’t know me.

I guess Karma is a bitch.

It pissed me off, but I guess he had the right to, because I had done the same thing just a week ago.

Yesterday I had a talk with my fathers and they were the ones that made me aware of my feelings, and I couldn’t sleep so I had stayed up all night thinking things through. It was now Saturday and I didn’t have anything to do, so I decided to pay Rylan a little visit even though he might not want it.

I spent the rest of the day at home, just trying to figure out what I wanted to say, but no luck. Everything just sounded so stupid in my head. I wouldn’t be surprised if he kicked my ass and never talked to me again.

It was 9 O’clock at night when I parked in front of his huge house. I hadn’t planned anything that I was going to say, so I was kinda nervous when I rang the doorbell. Their butler opened the door and looked at me with a surprised expression.

“ How can I help you, young Jacob?” The middle aged man asked with a smile on this face.

He remembered me from the last time I guess. I smiled before answering.” Is Rylan in?”

“Yes, he is. Should I call him down?” He asked as he opened the door wider so I could walk in.

“No, thank you. I want to surprise him.” I told him with a smile as I walked upstairs to his bedroom.