DEFEATISM

06

According to the super, they are to stay put until further notice. All staff members are instructed to remain indoors until the super decides that it is safe to leave. Rumours spread through the staff teams and discover that the super is off-campus. The super's fiancé lives in town, and so that is where they suspect the super has gone. Darlington hears about it from Hadley before anyone else. He keeps it to himself because it will do nothing but anger the resident assistants. They were all told to stay by the supers, and yet the supers fled town before the snow arrived.

By and large, the resident assistants are discussed by the unit in two groups. First-timers are those who have not worked in residence before. Ro, Moonie, Calypso, Benedict, Jerry, and Galilee are the members of the team who fit into this category. Generally, there are more first-timers every year because fewer and fewer people choose to come back.

The other group, the returners, is comprised of both second-timers and third-timers. One of the benefits of returning is a slightly higher stipend at the end of the semester. Yet, this comes with certain responsibilities. As such Marcellus, Darlington, Maverick, Tempest, and Elodie are tasked with helping the first-timers with tasks and discouraging gossip amongst the team. Returners aren't supposed to say anything bad about their job. Darlington takes his work seriously, and so when Hadley texts him the heads up, he keeps the information to himself.

It would be all right if Elodie and Marcellus didn't hear the news and decided to come down from whatever depths of the building they crawled into together. Elodie eats five pancakes, and usually, she is content to go with the flow, but as her hands feel the cheap pleather seats, her nerves buzzing from the texture, she cannot help but complain.

"It's bullshit," she shakes her head. "I could've been out of here yesterday. The super didn't even follow policy."

Ro has to leave the room. She stands in the washroom and screams to herself, shrieking. Elodie barely notices but the others do. Marcellus feels the panic. Usually, being high doesn't make him paranoid, but he's already been so on edge lately that he cannot help it. He wants to play video games but instead gets some cheap pencil crayons and some adult colouring sheets from their team meeting on prioritizing mental health strategies. The meeting was bullshit; if he wanted not to feel like shit, he'd just quit the job. The colours swirl on the page as he draws.

Then, people start to make calls to let their families know.

~~~

On the top floor, Galilee stares up at the ceiling. She hasn't changed out of her clothes, even though wearing them is wrong. She doesn't have to do it anymore. Taking them off is out of the question anyway.

~~~

In the privacy of his room, Jerry makes the call. In his anti-suicide chair, he leans back and puts his legs on his desk. The room is littered with takeout containers from the on-campus restaurants. This year, the Food Services Unit is trying to become more eco-friendly, and so they are up charging students for their mandatory reusable containers, which students can return at their leisure. Jerry hasn't returned some from frosh week.

He doesn't speak on the phone, except to say okay. He shifts in the Jerry, and it nearly topples over. The anti-suicide chairs, while preventing students from tipping over from leaning, tend to lean on their own. In that way, they may be anti-suicide, but they are pro-anxiety. He just listens to his mother ramble, ignoring most of it. Something about carbon monoxide poisoning from space heaters, which aren't even allowed in residences anyway.