Glimpse of us (Hausa story)

chapter 12

Hanan's pov

Please wake me up from this dream, not a dream nightmare. I'm scared, mom is not here. The panic attack hit real quick. I was shaking terribly and sweating. I cried, I run ot breath.

Sadeeq doesn't love asma'u anymore, Sadeeq loves Hanan. Hanan loves Sadeeq. I kept reassuring myself with those words. Lying to myself.

He shattered me with his word. I have never seen so much anger on him like today. This is a part of him i never know existed, how can I continue to live like this. I have him right with me but he is so far away.

....

I haven't even saw anything yet. Just a sight of the horrible days ahead of me. 1 week of marriage and apart from greetings nothing come between us, absolutely nothing. I have all my journals with me. Some I wrote how I will be so happy when I marry Sadiq but here I'm miserable.

I decided to too since it's been a week already. To cook for me and my Sadiq. Maybe I should ask him what he want for dinner? I'm scared to piss him off.

I decided to cook party jollof rice, chicken and orange juice. I place on the dining waiting for him.

"Yaya Sadeeq dinner is ready" I swear this are the hardest words I have said in a while. It tooks me a lot of practice just Because I'm scared of his reaction.

"Oh God " he sigh
"How many times do I have to repeat myself? Please do yourself a favor and not cook with me again. I will eat outside always."

"I'm sorry if I did anything wrong to you" the tears roll out of nowhere.

"You did nothing But I want you to understand me. I don't want you"

I didn't even bother to hear his words because they will crash me. I left immediately.

***

Days are passing by so quick. There's nothing hurts more than being strangers with your husband. With the man you love so much. The thing that hurt me the most right is the fact that my family and friends think I'm happy.  I hate the feeling of everything and I'm slowly loosing myself. I am very much aware of my obsession with Sadiq, I write about him every single day. But I'm going to break the silence. I sick advice from strangers online because that's the only way for me and everyone be like "communication is the key. Tell him how much you love him. Maybe that will change something".

Well I can't keep this to myself anymore. I love him dearly and I will do everything for him. I swear to God I can give my life to him.

****

Sadeeq's pov

It's been a month and few weeks since our Wedding, unbelievable. I'm aware I'm not treating her right but what can I do. I'm hurting so much. I turned to a better person for asma'u, love changed me.

I was known as the arrogant person, the distance person, the one that doesn't care about anyone. Until asma'u step into my life, I changed for her.

Hanan walk inI didn't say a single word to her. She just annoy me so much and everything she does get on my nerves. I don't like her at all and I'm very much aware how she want me so badly. I mean who doesn't? Every girl somehow has a crush on me and I don't care.

"Yaya Sadeeq I want to talk to you about something important"
"Speak"
"But you're not even looking at me"

I put my phone aside then look at her.
"Hope you know I don't have your time at all Hanan"

She started crying. What the hell is wrong with this gender?

"Leave please " I shouted
I suddenly felt intense anger. I hate nonsense. I hate the fact that she is not the woman I love.

"Are you not aware of how much I love you. Ya Sadeeq why don't you love me the way I do? Why can't we be a normal couple. I just want you to love me."

Maybe I have been so nice to her that made her say this words. I get up and she went on her feets holding my legs crying. Begging me.

I dragged my feet and left.

**

What the heck? My guy you can do better!

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With love, Sa'adah.