19. Contemplation

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"Why aren't you getting ready for school? Did you forget your new rules?" Jodie read out the message on my phone, and shook her head in disbelief. "You should tell them you're already here."

I nodded, and raised my phone to snap a photo. Me with a friend waving; Clint sitting next to us; racks of dead-tree books that could only be a part of the school library, and binders of homework stretched out on the desk in front of us.

"I'm going through last week's trig with Nikki. We both need more practice. Are you going to jump down my throat for being at school now?" I texted back a few seconds later. Just in case he could somehow misconstrue the photo as a couple of miscreants playing hooky to visit the Library of Rebel Studies or something. It was only when I looked at my screen again that I noticed an extra figure in the photo, standing next to the librarian. I turned around and waved to Serena, inviting her over to join us.

"You're in early," she said. "And wow, that looks painful. Are you okay?"

"Just bruises," Clint pushed himself to smile, and I couldn't help admiring that kind of bravery. No matter what they did, he'd just ignore it; maybe that was the best way to beat a bully after all.

"Have you guys met?" I asked. "Clint, Serena. Clint was doing skateboard practice this morning, so we headed down together. Got here quicker than I expected."

"I fall a lot," he said with a shrug.

"Not that much. Most of the injuries are thanks to one racist jerk."

"Yeah, Lorna saved me once or twice," he added.

"Oh, you're the kid Todd was going after? I heard about what happened to him. You're a legend, girl."

I blushed when Clint complimented me, and even more when Serena agreed. Like, she was one of the kids everybody had envied right through school, how could she possibly be impressed with anything I had done? I guessed that everyone must have heard what happened to Todd; I might have spent most of my school life beneath the notice of the cool kids, but he certainly wasn't. So was that why Serena had wanted to hang out with us suddenly? I had no idea, but it sounded like a way I might have attracted her attention.

I glanced down at my phone again. Mum wanted to know why there was someone with bandages and bruises at our table, and asked me to swear that I hadn't done that to him. I sighed, and quickly responded that I'd done first aid courses, and so often ended up making friends with people who had been injured in some way. It wasn't really an answer, but I didn't want to get into that whole debate right now.

"...kinda surprised, really," Jodie was saying. I wasn't sure how far the topic of conversation had drifted while I was trying not to think about when my Mum had stopped trusting me. "He doesn't seem the type to just let it go."

"Yeah, bit of an ego problem there," Serena agreed. "You weren't worried, Lorna? Or just didn't think about it in the moment?"

"Huh? Sorry, didn't catch that."

"Todd. Revenge. Like, without his gang it's not like he'll opt for violence, and you could probably outrun him anyhow. But he's one of those guys who just doesn't know when he's beaten. You don't worry when the other shoe's going to drop?"

"Maybe I already got it," I said, not looking up from my phone. That was something I didn't like to think about. "Like, my little run-in with Todd was what got my parents all worked up. Convinced that like helping people is an act of rebellion and they'll do whatever it takes to stop me. And then Becker told them about that thing with Mrs Yuan's window, and how I signed a citation for it. I thought they didn't need to know, it's my choice to pay for it. They'd probably get mad again. I mean, agreeing to pay for damages has a bigger impact on me personally than stepping up to give someone first aid. I didn't tell them, so when somebody else did they're so certain I actually threw the thing. So like... this is my punishment I guess. Standing up to Todd convinced my parents and Becker that I need to be knocked down, and this stupid shot is what they put together for me."

"That's how you got the pill?" Serena seemed surprised. "I never thought of it like that. I mean, his dad's in the perfect position to convince other parents, I guess. And he knows the law, he knows what to say to make it sound like a good idea. I bet he's not just given them the facts and let them choose to do this. It's Becker's idea, isn't it? He's talked them into it because he can't accept that Todd's such a moron."

"I guess. I should probably ask them what he actually said. I mean, I know he told them about that window, but I should have thought more about that. I don't know how accurate it was. Maybe if I ask them, I can help them understand why I agreed to it. They said they talked to a lawyer, and I need to get this shot to stay out of court, but maybe that's not true. I'll bet anything Becker's told them that I actually broke a window. What's the difference, legally, between accepting responsibility for something and actually doing it? I wouldn't be surprised if that makes a big difference to how a court would look at it."

"Maybe you can get out of your punishment sooner," Jodie said, and I had to smile. "Did you even find out what it is yet?"

"No, still nothing–" I started to answer, and then looked down as my phone buzzed, to find that Mum was sending the exact same question. I typed a quick response, and then went back to talking with my friends. I told them that I had no idea what the punishment was, but that I was spending every minute waiting for something to happen. Something terrible, I assumed, but I had no idea what it could be. I told them what Dad had said as well; that I couldn't visit friends until I knew what was going on, because my new problem might cause trouble for other people as well. And that I'd had to agree to telling Dad as soon as I had the faintest clue what it might be. Any further discussion was interrupted by the school bell; time to head for our classes. But Serena had one more thing to say before the day properly began.

"Look, I'll get my lawyer to talk to you. You'll like him. And he'll at least be able to tell you how much you're risking if you decide to veto the punishment pill. Juvie for a single incident seems like overkill, right? So come see me after school, I'll set you up with him."

"I don't know if I can afford–"

"Don't worry about it. You already helped me out, you know? Got me thinking in different ways, and I realised that Todd's ego might make him perfect to get me what I want. So I owe you one now. After school, right?"

"Y...yeah," I mumbled, lost at sea again. What was Serena interested in that Todd Becker of all people could help her out? It might make things easier for me, but I couldn't get over my confusion now. My newest friend was even more of an enigma than ever.

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