33. Reconcile and war

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I went inside the house and saw everyone sitting on the dining table but him. I sat beside them and Sofia set my plate for me.

"Is Achilles not home yet?" I asked.

"He is in his office, he said he is jot hungry" Sofia said and we all start eating but I was only picking on my food. Why is he not eating anything? Its not a good thing. When everyone leaves after eating I stood up and set a plate of food for him. I went toward his office and after contemplating knocked on his door.

"Come in" came his grave voice. I closed my eyes for a moment and then went inside. His back was facing me as he was looking outside the window.

There was makeshift bed in the corner of the room which looks very uncomfortable. I felt very bad for taking his room.

"I brought you food" I said softly and he turned around instantly after hearing my voice, he looked at me as if he didn't believe seeing me there.

"I am not hungry" he said and looked away from me.

"But you didn't had your dinner, it's not a good thing to sleep empty stomach" I scolded lightly.

"Here I am keeping it here, eat it before it gets cold" it was snowing outside again, it's like this for few days now, it snows at night. His office was also very cold.

"It's cold here, you can come back to your room. I will stay at Beatrice's place" I said thinking of the time when Beatrice offered me to live at her place.

"No" came his gruff reply, I looked at him and he was frowning.

"But its so cold here and uncomfortable.." I said looking at his sleeping place.

"Why are you doing this?" He asked me and I stood dumbfounded there.

"What .." I started but he cuts me off.

"You made it pretty clear this morning that you don't want me and you moved on. And now you came here with food. Why?" He asked with a scowl.

"Achilles I ..." I paused not knowing how to start.

"You were right you shouldn't have forgiven me, I don't deserve your forgiveness as I didn't earn it. No one in their right mind would forgive me for what I did to you. I was crazy to think otherwise" he whispered the last part.

"I don't deserve you, you were right. I don't deserve your love, you are too good for me and I don't deserve any good thing" he said and looked down.

"You don't know what I felt when you left me and when you came back there was this hope in my heart that told me I can have you and I can make you happy but I was wrong. Nothing can go back to normal between us." He said looking at me eyes.

"Achilles please don't say this, I was crazy to say such things. They weren't true, I was made to say such things....." I started but it looked like he wasn't listening to me he was in his own thoughts.

"Achilles" I called him but he didn't listen, I went near him and held his hand startling him in the process. He took a step vack from me freeing his hand.

"I will stay away from you now on, I am sorry for everything I did to you. I apologise" he said and then he was out of the room and then the house.  I saw him going into the dark in the cold night without looking back. I felt dears running down my cheeks.

What have I done? What have I done?

I cried all night of what I have done to him and myself. Now when I remember I said to him I want kill myself, I was so hurtful with my words. I have drawn him so far away from me and now I don't think he will ever come near me again.

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