Burntout

"Yes."

Andromeda Claire Holloway

My mind went blank as Regulus carefully put his lips on mine, his arms tight around my waist. Without thinking, I put my hands on his chest and gave in to the gentle kiss, nothing more than the feeling of a butterfly landing on you.

But the sparks were there, like a fire starting.

He ran his tongue along the bottom of my lip before pulling away, leaving me dizzy and with a fluttering feeling in my stomach. He smiled at me, genuinely and I noticed that he looked just as flushed as I felt.

His hands were still wrapped around me and I remembered the image my mind had conjured up a few days ago on the mountain. I looked up at Regulus and he cocked his head to the side.

"Why?" I asked, my words quiet and shaky.

"Because I realized...you make me feel whole, you make me feel like I have a reason to live just so I can hear your voice one more time, see you smile one more time...hold you in my arms one more time."

I looked at him and saw for the first time all the love and adoration he had hidden in those eyes, the eyes I had thought were deceiving and dark. They were the embers in the fire and I was the flame.

"But what if," I found my voice to ask the question, "what if I'm not enough?"

He smiled gently, reaching up to brush my hair from my face, "You are enough, a thousand times enough."

Tears were pricking the corners of my eyes and my throat felt closed up. He took my chin in his hand and tilted my head up to look at him, "My darling, my lovely Amoris, you don't think I love you?"

"I-I'm not sure," I got out, tears betraying me and I felt them slowly slide down my face.

"You will never be unloved by me," he said, wiping away my tears with his thumb, "You are too well entangled in my soul."

I let out a sob and he wrapped me in his arms, letting me bury my face in his shoulder and let my tears soak through his shirt. He ran his hand through my hair and whispered, "I'm here. No matter what, even if you don't want to talk to me, I'm going to be here forever for you."

He swayed with me in his arms, small steps were taken on the wood floor. It gave me a faint reminder of the memories of dancing with him in the ballroom. Regulus took my hand and held it out, spinning slowly in a circle.

I felt myself smile through my tears, happy tears, as we danced to a song only we could hear. This was what happiness felt like.

I looked down and saw the fleeting ribbons of fire intertwining between the two of us. He looked down at them and then back at me, "I haven't seen those in years."

"The flashbacks always hurt," I said softly.

"I learned something when you left. It's not the goodbye that hurts but the memories that follow."

The tears slowed to a stop and I gazed at him, "The memories of us always hurt the most."

"Loving you, darling, was the most exquisite form of self-destruction."

I curled my lip, "That's a nice way of putting it."

"So tell me," he paused, "if I told you I've fallen in love with you again but I'm scared of the same thing happening, would you still love me?"

A thousand thoughts spiraled through my head, a thousand different answers I could give. What if I make the wrong decision?

What if...what if I am too much of a mess for this, to wholeheartedly love him?