A Girl's Guide to Fairy Tales

Chapter Seven (part 1)

Chapter Seven - Issie

I caught Alex’s eye from the wings while Guy was giving him some pointers about how to react to the news that his wife, played by me, was being posted to Afghanistan. It was an Act Two role reversal and quite a novel idea – not that I would ever tell Guy that seeing as he wrote the play.

Two wars, one past one present with mine and Alex’s characters at the heart of them both.

As Guy looked down at the script splayed open like a dead bird in his hand, Alex looked at me again and held my gaze. I took a step forward, longing to burst onto stage to ask why he was ignoring me all of a sudden.

Last week we went out for drinks as a result of my mother’s meddling but I’d ended up having a wonderful evening. And a wonderful night for that matter. Since then rehearsals had been much more fun too. We had been out for dinner twice and he had stayed round at mine every night – once even in his army uniform.

Alex turned away sharply leaving me looking at what was essentially just another fling. That was all.

‘Oh Isobel,’ I mumbled to myself. ‘You would have ended it eventually. It’s just unfortunate he seems to have beaten you to it.’

I wasn’t in the habit of talking to myself but on occasions such as this, a girl needed to hear a comforting voice.  I couldn’t let anyone know how I truly felt and so I had no choice but to split myself into the problem and the solution. ‘After all a relationship with an actor is a recipe for disaster. Ask your father.’

As I had not yet decided what sort of mood I was in today, this little episode helped me choose. Once Alex had turned his back to me, I knew right then and there that today I was Isobel, the girl who didn’t give a crap and would instead get even.

A few deep breaths later, I felt completely in character and was ready to go.

‘Hi, can I order some flowers please?’ I gushed down the phone.

‘Not that old trick Issie,’ said Olivia with a half smile as she returned with two vanilla lattes and a slice of carrot cake from the cafe across the street. ‘He’ll know you sent them to yourself.’

I hung up. ‘You’re extremely perceptive today Olivia and you’re quite right,’ I said all teeth, breasts and bouncy hair. ‘Ordering flowers for oneself over the phone, is too demeaning. Therefore you need to go and buy me a gorgeous bouquet, come back in, present them to me and say that Antonio dropped them off.’ My smile turned a little manic.

‘Who’s Antonio?’

‘You know,’ I encouraged. ‘Antonio. The guy I just made up.’

‘Oh Antonio!’ Olivia slapped her forehead with the palm of her hand. ‘How could I forget? He’s absolutely beautiful.’

I tilted my head to the side and smiled to reveal as many of my pearly whites as possible. ‘I know. It was a shame I had to break up with him.’ I sighed. ‘So will you do that for me? Please?’

‘Only if you tell me what Alex was like in bed.’

‘But we didn’t – okay done.’

‘And don’t skimp on the details.’

I paused. It had been relatively straight forward sex, albeit not always in the bedroom. Oh and there had been a drunken incident on the first night when halfway through a sexy dance, which I thought he might like seeing I had given him the impression I was a sex kitten, my heel caught in the rug and I fell head first into the wall.

I had stolen the idea off of Sophie, who I understood performed the act far more successfully than I had.

I realised I was subconsciously rubbing the bump on my forehead now as I thought about it. That would serve me right for trying to be something I wasn’t. I suppose Olivia could have all the details save that one. ‘Fine,’ I agreed.