Shiver

Shiver Line 7-8

I wake up again.  I open my agonizing eyes.

'Em?'

There is a queer silence.  Fuck.  Don't tell me she have left.  I can't afford to lose her anymore.  No'

.But then, when my eyes look downwards, I feel reliefed.

She is in my arms.  Literally.  She curl herself like a baby and sleeps in my arm.  Just like a dad holding their daughter to sleep.  Her eyebags could tell me how tired she is.  I guess I shall take most of the blame for her eyebags.

I wake up and I feel way lot better now.  Mate.  How good is that.

I decide not to wake her up.  I look at her, pamper her hair and hug her tighter.  I take out my iphone and capture this sight.

How I wish this moment is going to stay here forever.  But of course, life is brutal and short.  Good things never stay too long.

She wakes up.

'Hey, what is the time now?' she asked

' It's eight in the night.  Feel like going to candle light dinner with me eh'

'Erm, i don't know mike.'

'Oh come on.'

' I am going to get myself sorted anyways.'

After 15 minutes, I see her get out of the bathing room, with a nice gown on her.

Well, to be honest, my Emma is never and ever will be considered good-looking.  I love her that much since she knows me really well and I just have this feeling.  Love is not all about looks.  If it is, why don't I just pay a model to be my girlfriend?  Money is never a problem to me.  But tonight it is different.  Her confidence just makes her look graceful and elegant.

If I was still 17/18 years old, I definitely would have asked her whether she wanted to go out dining now.  But now, after all these years, i am a different man.

I quickly get myself dressed in the loo.  Then, I walk up to her.  I grab her hand and run.

' Where are we going?'

'Don't ask.  Just lock the door.' 

Whilst she is locking the door, I hold her waist tightly, as if i were his boyfriend.

I grab herhand and ran to the French restaurant, 'Memories.'

Memories.

I hold her waist tightly and I look into her eyes, flirtily ask her, ' Shall we have dinner here, my madamme?'

She softly replies, 'No! You are sick, let's go to have congee.'

'Oh for fuck's sake.  Come on.  I don't even care about my health, why would you even bother to care?'

She does not answer back.  Instead, she grabs my hand tightly and storms out of the area, just like a mother taking care of a naughty child.

I guess I am going to have congee then.

While we are having some congee at the hawker centre, I insist to order some beer.  Yeah.  Fuck health concerns.  Live under the moment.   We chat a lot about the memories that we had in the past few years.  Like how we lost contact and the dark ages.  She advises me to take care of my health and she even says I can live with her for a week, such that there is someone to take good care of me.  Deep down, I know that I can do a great job of taking care of myself as I have been living on my own for 8 years.  Still, I reckon she is hinting at something so why shall I reject her hospitality?

I grab her hand and I said to her, with tears rolling down,' Girl, just do not leave me again.  I don't want to lose you anymore.  You mean more than anything to me.'

'Oh come on, is that how you flirt with girls?'

'No, Annisa.  Listen me through.  I am being serious.  You know what is the only flaw that you have?  You never try.  Why not give a romance between me and you a shot?  If you never try, you never going to succeed.  Please.  I promise you that if I ever have the honor to be your man, I will always be tamed like a little lamb and do anything to protect you.'

Tears roll down from eyes.  She loses my hand.  Oh my god.  Is something castatrophic going to happen?

She loses my hand , rushes to me and lie on my shoulders.  I am dumb-strucked by all this.

She lies on my shoulders , punches my massive arm and goes hysteria.  She says, ' You are a jerk, you know?  Why do you have to be so nice to me?  Why can't you just be mean to me?  You do know that you mean a lot to me, right?  I actually deliberately ignore you, hoping that is going to inhibit my love for you.  But after all these years, I still love you.  I am glad that you say it out.  I .... love..... you....... '

After listening to her, I can't stop crying.  Tears literally flood out from my eyes.  Although I am aware of the fact that I am wearing a 800-pound Hugo Boss Shirt, I choose not to wipe off my tears.  I embrace the traces left by my tears.  Yes.  I am weak.  Still, I try my best to hug her as tight as I could.  I try my best to stroke her silky hair and her back.  At this very moment, everything doesn't matter.  Clubbing, fame, money, wine, hot chicks, my dream car.  None of this seems to matter anymore.  None.

After I pay the bill, we take a stroll back to her place. 

I am always there by her side.  Although she tries and resists my love, it turns out that she actually cares about me.

Thank God.