Frerard - Against All Odds

2

Gerard threw his bags into the corner of Mikey's spare room and slumped down on to the bed. He threw an arm over his face and let out a relieved breath. His head ached and he just wanted sleep to overcome him, so that he could forget about the events of the day and start afresh with his brother in the morning.

There was no sleep to be had, however, and all he could hear was Mikey's friends laughing and joking in the front room. He instantly convinced himself that they were laughing at him and what a loser he was, but the more he thought about it, deep down, he knew that Mikey wouldn't stand for that, and that his paranoia was probably getting the better of him. Most of his brother's friends actually seemed nice, from the little time he had spent stood in front of them. None of them looked like they were judging him or thinking him some kind of fucking weirdo for needing his kid brother's help. And he was relieved about that, knowing that Mikey would no doubt force him to join in socially with his friends at some point. They were so different; Mikey always finding it easy to score with girls and having a constant group of friends surrounding him, while Gerard had always just had his brother as his friend, and had sort of fell into any relationships that he had had. That's partly why he'd distanced himself from Mikey over the last year or so, to almost prove to himself that he could make it on his own, with his own friends and his own boyfriend. His relationship with Bert had turned to shit though, and any new friends he had weren't actually his, but his boyfriend's. And now he was back needing his brother after all.

He didn't know when he managed to finally fall asleep, but waking confused at around 2.30 am, he felt cold, and realised that he was lying on top of the duvet. He pulled off his uncomfortable jeans and climbed under the cover, pulling it high around his neck. He went back to thinking about Bert and wondered what he was doing. He fumbled around in the dark for his phone on the bedside table, squinting as he unlocked the screen. There was nothing. Not even a simple message asking where Gerard was or whether he was ok. He could be fucking dead in a ditch, and Bert couldn't even be bothered to check. He threw the phone on the floor and felt tears sting at his eyes. He wasn't particularly sad about him and Bert, but more the fact that he clearly didn't give a shit about him. He was on his fucking own. Again! And that hurt more than he expected it to. He tossed and turned some more, until finally (after what felt like hours) his eyelids grew heavy again and he drifted off to sleep.

He needed coffee. Coffee and some painkillers for the headache that was still nagging at his temples. He stretched out and swung his legs out of bed, before pulling his legs into his jeans from the previous day and making his way to Mikey's kitchen.

He found his brother with an arm full of beer bottles from the night before. He smiled at Gerard before dropping them loudly into the black plastic box, causing his headache to pound a little harder than before.

"Morning" he smiled.

"Hey Mikes" Gerard replied heading over to the coffee maker.

"I'm just taking the trash out Gee. Pour me one and then we need to talk. Okay?"

"Yeah. Sure" Gerard replied, knowing Mikey would want to talk to him about Bert the minute he woke.

He poured their coffees and found some headache tablets in the cupboard, swallowing them down with a glass of water. He headed into the lounge which was now clear of any bottles and overflowing ash trays and dropped down onto the couch.

He readied himself for Mikey's questioning. He knew he owed him an explanation for just turning up on his doorstep, but he really didn't feel like talking about it all right now.

He didn't have much time to dwell on that though, as Mikey reappeared in the doorway heading in his direction.

"Mmm. Thanks" he sighed taking a gulp of his coffee. "So?" he began looking over at Gerard.