Choni One Shots pt: 2

368: The One With The Tragedy

This one and the last one aren't connected! I accidentally wrote them back to back and I don't feel like doing anything about it

TONI POV:

"Ok, so today we are splitting up into boys and girls! Girls on one side, boys on the other." The teacher says to the class. My heart drops. I raise my hand. "Can I go to the bathroom?" The teacher nods and I get up and leave. I walk into the blue and gold. Betty is there. "What are you doing here?" She ask concerned. "Ditching class." She nods. "Why?" She ask confused. "Mr. James was separating the class into boys and girl's and I don't feel like having that conversation with him because it's not going to go in my favor." I tell her. "I'm sorry." I sit down on the couch. "What are you doing here?" I ask her. "I have Study. My teacher let's me come here instead." I nod. "Have you seen Cheryl?" I ask her. "Not really. She's been looking for you though." I nod. "We got in a fight last night." I tell her. "Nothing major! But we kinda left it in the air and I'm ready to talk and apologize. She's probably ready to continue the fight." I say quietly. "No, she said she wants to do the same." She tells me. "Really?" She nods. The door opens. "Speaking of the devil." Betty says quietly. "Why aren't you in class?" Cheryl asks immediately. "Because the class was separated into boys and girls and I am neither." I say quietly. "Fair enough. Ah! The school resource officer is looking for you. Your dad is here." She tells me. I stand up. "Why?" I ask concerned. I feel my body go numb, this can't be good. "I don't know." She says quietly. "Ok. Can we talk tonight? I feel really bad about yesterday." I ask her. "Me too, but I think we should talk through it so something like this doesn't happen again." She tells me. I nod. I kiss her cheek. "I love you." I say quietly. She smiles. "I love you too." She tells me. I walk out of the Blue and gold and go to the office. I see my dad standing there. "What happened?" I ask him. He looks at me. "Toni..." I look at him. "Mom
Died?" He nods. "I'm sorry." He whispers.

I hear a knock on my door. "Toni, it's me." I hear Cheryl say. "I'm coming in." She says before opening the door. I'm just lying bed in silence. I feel her sit at the end of my bed and place her hand on my leg. "I'm sorry." She whispers. I look at her. "I don't want to talk right now." I say quietly. "Do you want me to just sit here with you?" I nod. "Ok. I'm here." She says quietly. I look at her after a few minutes of silence. She notices and looks at me. "Do you want to talk?" She ask quietly. I shift in bed so I'm on my back. "I don't really know how to feel right now." I tell her. She nods. "I was the same way when Jason died." She says quietly. "I'm not trying to make this about me, I'm just trying to relate." I nod sitting up. "I know." I say quietly. "I don't really know how to express how I'm feeling. Can we talk about something else to get my mind off of this?" I ask her. "We can talk about last night." She says quietly. I nod. "I completely forgot we planned something." I whisper. "I shouldn't have stood you up like that. It all happened so fast yesterday." I tell her. I feel a wave hit me. "Fuck." I whisper. "This is also about your mom?" I nod. "As I told you yesterday, she had a stroke." I whisper. "You didn't tell me that." I look at her. "I thought I did." She shakes her head. "No! You just said something was wrong with your mom and didn't tell me anything after that! You waited to tell me when you stopped by, we started arguing about why you stood me up and then you said that!" I groan. "I'm sorry! I thought I said something!" I apologize. "I'm not mad about it anymore! You're going through more important things right now." She tells me. "I wasn't really mad about it after you left last night when I had time to calm down." She adds. "Can I make it up to you?" I ask quietly. She nods. "You don't really have to." She says quietly. "I want to." I tell her. "I didn't tell you what was going on. I feel really bad about it." I whisper. "Toni, your emotions are all over the place right now, you can make it up to me by getting through this right now." She tells me. "That doesn't really make sense but I get what you're trying to say." I whisper. We both smile a little. "Are you going to school tomorrow?" She ask quietly. "No. I probably won't go back for the rest of the week. Can you pick up stuff I need?" She nods. "Of course." She whispers moving some hair out of my face. "I'll come over every day until you come back to check on you." She tells me. "You don't have to do that." I whisper. "Well, I'm bringing you your homework so I'm probably gonna have to see you everyday anyways. Also I'll bring Pop's." I smile a little. "I'm ok with that." I say quietly. "Did you see how my dad was doing when you came in?" I ask her. "Not really. I think he's in shock." I nod. "What about you?" She ask quietly. I shake my head. "I don't know. She hadn't been doing well, with the treatment and obviously the stroke pushed her over the edge. I kinda saw it coming but it still hurts." I tell her. "It's never easy even if you know." She tells me. "I just really hope no one sits me down and tries to tell me how I'm supposed to grief." I tell her. "What do you mean?" She ask quietly. "Remember how I told you I had that teacher that died?" She nods. "My guidance counselor told me how I was trying to tell me how I was supposed to feel. She wouldn't listen to me when I told her I bottle my feelings until I explode and instead of helping me through that she said that wasn't how I'm supposed to grief." I explain. "That's not good." She says not really knowing how to respond. Cheryl isn't really that good at knowing what to say, I know that but her listening to me and validating my feelings is enough for me. I don't need her to say anything and she knows that. I feel bad because I think she still thinks she has to fill the air, but she doesn't. I simple nod is good enough for me. "She should get fired. She sucked at her job. I could go into her office with my wrist slit open and she would be more worried about my math grade!" I say annoyed. "That's ridiculous." She says quietly. I nod. "She didn't know what to do with me when I came out either! She said she would notify all my teachers about the name and pronouns thing and then deadnamed me and used the wrong pronouns." I tell her. "You did just shorten your name though. She couldn't have looked at it as a nickname?" She ask confused. "No! Because that would be too easy! My 90 year old grandmother understands this concept better then my 30 year old guidance counselor!" I tell her. "My fish is understands it better." I joke. "You have a fish?" She ask quietly. "Not anymore bubbles died a week after getting him, that's what I get for naming a fish bubbles." I tell her. She smiles. "You named your fish bubbles?" She ask quietly. "I was 7." She nods. "Your fish who died before you came out understood better?" I nod. "He was the first person I came out to." I tell her. "He didn't question it." She looks at me. "It's a fish, they just swim around and get happy when you feed them." She tells me. "So? He didn't care." She smiles and kiss me. "You're so cute sometimes." I smile. I look at her.