pulling on your heart to push my luck

The Great Between

Wherever I was, it was vast.

A never ending space, with only the grip I had on Korra's limp hand to anchor me in the physical world. I was vaguely aware of my legs and I could feel the breeze in my hair, but for all I knew the hand touching the portal might have ceased to exist entirely.

There was nothing to see. That's not to say that it was dark, but there wasn't any light, either. I know I should have been terrified, but truthfully, no part of me wanted to fight it. I let myself sink into it, slowly, like slipping underneath the water in a bathtub, and expected to have to push past overwhelming pain or the survival instinct to resurface and catch my breath, but something about it pulled me in further.

I tried to call out Korra's name. My voice sounded like it was miles away, slowly echoing as it made its way back to me before disintegrating into a quiet plea. I tried again, and listened hard for a response, but got nothing.

I drew in a breath to try a third time when I thought I heard my name from somewhere far, far behind me. "Asami?"

It was a familiar voice. "Korra?" I shouted. The space was so deep that it muffled the sound–no matter how loud I yelled, it would never make it all the way to the farthest corners, if it even ended at all. It couldn't bounce along the borders of it. It just went as far as it could before dissolving. Just a little further, I thought, feeling the weight of my body rock along the tops of my knees as I leaned deeper into the portal.

"Korra!" I tried again, ignoring the tingling in my limbs. "Is that you?" I knew the Spirit World was deceptive, and I didn't want to be fooled into thinking I had already found her. That would be too easy, and there was a good chance I would find myself completely lost here without her. I tightened my grip on her hand as all sensation in my body began to fade, when I suddenly felt myself being pulled backwards. My voice flew away from me. I couldn't even feel Korra's hand anymore, all that was left was a tugging sensation as I frantically tried to find her spirit.

"Asami?" The voice was louder than last time.

I leaned further into the portal, trying to compensate for whatever was trying to drag me back out again, feeling as if my body was being stretched thinner and thinner. I couldn't break yet. I was so close. So, so close, I just needed to get a little closer–

"Asami!"

My hand broke contact with the portal and I was yanked backwards onto the ground, my body snapping back into place like a rubber band. My vision returned all at once and I closed my eyes immediately, the brightness of the portal was too much and I couldn't bring myself to look at a world that she was no longer in.

Then I scrambled back onto my knees. I couldn't give up. I was so close I could almost feel her, and I thought that maybe if I tried again I could get it right. Whether or not I would didn't actually matter, I was going to try anyway. I raised my hand before the portal again and took another deep breath.

I couldn't bring myself to look at her. But I lifted her hand, pulling it towards me to give it a kiss goodbye, when I thought I felt her finger twitch.

I opened my eyes as I felt a light squeeze. "Korra?" I turned around, her hand still in mine, and our eyes met for the first time in days. She smiled.

"Fuck, Korra," I breathed, throwing my body over hers.

She wrapped her arms around me and pulled me on top of her. I buried my face in her neck, speechless, too focused on her body pushing into mine with every breath she took as I waited for her to speak first.

"Say something," I whispered. I wouldn't believe that she was actually back until she did.

She laughed, then said: "you sound like shit."