A Moment Longer [Chaelisa] [COMPLETE]

10. The visits

Eight Months Later...

I felt like I was breaking into someone's home, despite the fact that it was half my own.

Everything appeared to be exactly as we had left it. The beach house was bitterly cold. It was necessary to turn on the heat. It was the middle of May, and the island was still relatively cool. I wasn't supposed to return until the end of June, but the house where I was renting an apartment was sold, so I had to leave.

That left me with no choice but to leave for Newport as soon as possible; otherwise, we would have been homeless. It made sense because I was already on maternity leave until the end of the school year.

We couldn't find any temporary tenants in the off season, so the beach house sat empty. I was overcome by an unexpected sense of longing. This place used to make me think of grandma, but now it makes me think of Lisa. I could practically smell her cologne in the kitchen. It was my imagination, but it felt real.

I also imagined her standing near the coffeepot, smirking while stirring her coffee fusion…her muscled back as she looked out the window toward the ocean…the lick, slam, suck as she drank tequila. Gazing toward the living room, I remembered our awkward final night before Winter returned.

Closing my eyes for a moment, I imagined it was last summer when life was so simple. Then, the little cry coming from the baby carrier strapped to my chest snapped me back to reality.

Bea's head wiggled back and forth in search of my breast. "Wait…wait. I have to take you out of this thing first." Removing her from the Baby Bjorn, I mambled, "You were so good during the ride. You must be so hungry, huh cutie bear?"

Shit. Most of my stuff was still in the car. I carried my two-month-old daughter outside to retrieve the breastfeeding pillow from my backseat. Jennie had bought it for me, insisting it was the one item I’d need the most, and she was right. It was bright pink with white daisies and an absolute necessity in order to feed this constantly hungry baby without breaking my back. I stopped for a moment to admire the ocean before returning inside.

Bea was short for Bella. It sounds right like that. She was named after my grandmother. My baby girl was born in mid-March, one week before her due date. Shawn chose not to be there. He said he wanted proof that the baby was his, and until then, he wasn’t going to acknowledge her as his daughter. Because we’d used condoms, he assumed that it was unlikely that he could be the father. He was the only person I’d slept with before getting pregnant, but there was simply no way to prove that to him if he didn’t take my word for it.