For the First Time [kaisoo]

6 // changes

0507.

More than a month has passed ever since Kyungsoo returned that spare key to Jongin's apartment. He thinks it's of no use anymore, now that he has no reason to go there.

"It could've been a bad April Fool's prank. But heck, I was more than surprised to hear him say it isn't. It felt worse."

Baekhyun didn't know how to comfort his friend. If only Kyungsoo was still the same jolly person who cries a river when in pain, it could've been easier; but no. Kyungsoo plays tough, and Baekhyun do not know how this level works. The easy level is strategic, but the difficult level is experimental. "Fuck. Just cry, Kyungsoo."

Kyungsoo stared at nowhere, his grip on the phone, tight. "But what can my tears do? Can they bring Jongin and I back?"

"No," Baekyun stated. "But those tears would help bring the Kyungsoo I know, back."

That night, Kyungsoo let the tears flow. The tickling teardrop rolling down his cheeks making him lonelier than he already is. He's crying. He's fucking crying and the only one who can make him smile is the same person who made him cry. And fuck it, he thought as he furiously wiped the tears away, that person is the only person he wants to make him stop crying and smile again.

At the other side of the story, Kim Jongin is currently battling with his mind, because his priorities aren't the same anymore. He can't think well, unlike how he used to. Even his boss, who suggested that he take a break, noticed how he's changed after.

"What happened?"

"I don't know." Jongin uttered as his boss uses that father-like tone on him again. "Please don't ask me anymore--"

"You're sad."

"That..." Jongin sighed. "I know."

"Why?"

"I-I can't explain." Jongin looked down. "I'm sorry."

"I'm afraid I'm not the one you should apologize to." His boss smiled at him and tapped his shoulder. "Is it that small guy who visited you here at lunch?"

"I'm confused. I don't know how to set my priorities straight anymore. I love him but--"

"No but's, Kim Jongin. You said you love him. If you couldn't choose between two things, that's because you don't have to choose. Priorities don't mean you need to take one ahead of the other. Balance them."

Jongin just stared at his boss, an elder man he never thought could speak such words to him. For the first time, he realized that he loved. And that he still loves. Kyungsoo.

"I can't believe you're a writer!" his boss chuckled. "You're realizing things when you've written them already. Correct your mistakes immediately!"

Jongin heard every word, but he bolted out of the office too fast that he forgot to thank the man who made him understand what he felt and advised him what to do.

Only one thing is running in his mind as he rushed out of the publishing company building.

Kyungsoo.