Boys like Boys|| Peter Parker

.7.

June, 2015

"You probably noticed I have a really weird style of fighting" Oliver continued with his push ups. It was around 4 in the morning and after waking up from two nightmares, the two had decided they better get their day started with. 

Their morning routine had been consistent— exercise, a little run where they challenged each other, then breakfast.

It had been a week or so after 'Anomaly' had left. Oliver had been pissed because Anomaly was a stupid name and she seemed to lack creativeness in coming up with a new name. In that week, not only had they moved from Germany to a quiet town in Austria, the two seemed to be getting closer. It took Bucky the week to convince Oliver to open up, because even though the two had formed some weird bond, they still didn't trust each other completely. Bucky understood that, but he had hundreds of questions. 

The older man suggested telling each other a bit about themselves, so Oliver wouldn't feel like he was the only one sharing. The boy in question took a deep breath.

"Last year, maybe a year and a half ago, HYDRA scientists needed some 'volunteers' to create an army of enhanced people who would serve HYDRA. And as you know, HYDRA and Dreykov are bffs. I don't actually know what bffs means, I just heard a teenage girl say that"

Bucky nodded his head for him to continue. He quite liked listening to the boy talk. It was so unlike every aspect of him, so free, the words just tumbling out with no end in sight.

Oliver rambled on, "The red room sent about a fifteen widows. I was one of them. At first I got trained, HYDRA style. They're more aggressive, more hand to hand combat, like you. Then they experimented on us" Oliver's voice broke. "It was... I hated it. Anomaly and I survived.. barely. But the other thirteen... they— they didn't. There was also these two— never mind, they're not important"

"I was sent back to the red room when we showed no signs of powers. After Madam Petrova had installed the mind reading chip— she got to know about the whole...." Oliver gestured to himself, indicating he was talking about being trans, "And they sent me on a mission to die where I escaped from" The boy took a shaky breath. He felt like he was showing his heart to Bucky, making himself vulnerable. He was almost tempted to lie, but he didn't. He hadn't told anyone about any of this. Having friends and sharing was something actively discouraged in the red room.

"A month later, I heard that Strucker was killed. Not gonna lie, I celebrated. But I wanted to make sure he really was dead, or if I could get any answers. So I was making my way to Sokovia when we met..." Oliver tilted his head, "Your turn, Brandon" 

Bucky nodded. He took a shaky breath. 

Oliver clenched his jaw. Give and take of info right? Bucky wouldn't back out right? He had no reason to tell Oliver anything? And now the stupid boy had gone and told a stranger everything about himself... what if Bucky really did go to the red room— what if he was an undercover HYDRA spy?? what if—

"I- I don't remember much" Bucky began. He got this faraway look as if he was remembering the good part of his life, before HYDRA. Oliver couldn't relate, he didn't remember anything before the red room. Just being kicked out. "But, I remember a person. Seventy years ago" He smiled softly.

"Lucky gal"

"Guy"

"Oh, excuse my hetero normativity"

"He was my best friend" Bucky gave him a look as if to say nothing more, "At least, according to the museums. He became the guy called Captain America and a year ago, I was sent on a mission to kill him because he was becoming a nuisance to HYDRA."

"The trisekelion mess" Oliver nodded, he shifted on the ground uncomfortably. Madam Petrova had been in a bad mood for an entire month and that had meant a lot of pain for those undeserving of it. "I— I heard about that"

"I hurt him, bad. But he refused to fight me. He kept saying some things that I vaguely remember- I don't know" Bucky shook his head in frustration. He looked so lost and confused. "Then he fell, and I didn't even hesitate. I know I knew him. I— It's complicated"

"Seems like everything is"

"You could say that again"

"Seems like everything is?" Oliver rose an eyebrow, pausing his push ups for a second.

"Why did you say that again?"

"Because... you told me to?"

"It's just a thing people say" Bucky explained. "I didn't mean it literally"

"Why would you say something but not mean it?"

"That's exactly what I thought"

"I'm literally like a younger, hotter version of you"

"Why are you hotter?" 

"Cause I just am"

"Not with that haircut" Bucky scoffed, pointing to Oliver's messily chopped hair. It literally looked like someone had taken a knife and hacked off as much as possible, and without Oliver's masculine glare it would've made him look like a girl with a pixie cut. 

"Ouch man" Oliver held a hand to his chest, resting his entire body weight on one hand. "You wound me"

Oliver frowned, running his hand up and down his chest. 

"Speaking of wounds..." Bucky started, "Why didn't you use your powers against me?"

Oliver froze. He didn't really like using his powers, he just didn't. How could he put that into words? "I can't" He lied, "I can't use it on bigger things, just lifting a coin makes me feel like I've run a marathon" Not a complete lie, but not the whole truth either.

"That's it?"

"Yeah" Oliver stopped his pushups. Bucky isn't stupid, Oliver knew that. 

He waited a moment. Then another. And another. But Bucky didn't push. He knew Oliver was lying, but either he genuinely wasn't interested in the actual reason, or he understood it was something personal. 

Oliver admired him even more after that. 

The truth was, and Oliver could never put this into words, he would never be able to convey all of his feelings into sentences. He just felt too much and thought too much for words to be enough. 

How could he explain his entire thought process? He was literally captured as a child and forced to be a murderer, and then as if that wasn't bad enough, forcefully experimented on and given powers he never asked for. 

He had a complicated relationship with his powers. 

They helped him too much to hate them. 

But at the same time, Oliver wished he never went through all that just for metal manipulation. 

"Well, I suppose that's it then" Oliver slapped his thighs, breaking the eye contact before getting up and drinking some water. "I'm heading out for the run, join me when you're done"

"Be there in a minute, kid"

Oliver nodded and adjusted his shoes. Just as he was about to disappear from view out of the apartment, he looked back in. "And Billy... "

He paused. For a second, Bucky was sure he'd changed his mind and wasn't going to say what he was thinking, but then Oliver continued-

"thanks"

Bucky didn't need to ask what Oliver was thanking him for. He knew.