Returning to Family (Sons of Anarchy)

Falling Apart

Chapter Twenty Seven: Falling Apart

I kept hearing this annoying beeping sound in my sleep, I couldn't get my thoughts straight I wasn't sure if I had a horrible nightmare or if it was reality. The last thing I think I remember was being shot and seeing my mother and brother kneeling over me but that couldn’t have happened I had to be ok. My eye lids felt too heavy to open so I tried to bring one of my hands to my face but it felt like something was weighting it down. When I was finally able to open my eyes I saw that I was in a hospital room and I started to panic, I looked down to see why my hand wouldn't move and that's when I saw Juice sitting in a chair leaning forward with his head beside me holding my hand under his head.

I gave his hand a squeeze. "Juan Carlos." I said to him in a low raspy voice but he didn't move.

I didn't realize we weren't alone until Chibs spoke. "Juicy wake up." He said hitting Juice on the back as he got up and came closer to me. "Lass are ya ok, do ya need me ta get ya something."

"Jess you're awake." Juice practically screamed as he let my hand go to hit the nurse's call button but grabbed it again once he was done. That's when I saw his other arm in a sling.

I looked between the two tired faces but I didn't see Happy. "Where's Happy?" I asked as I coughed and felt excruciating pain in my stomach, I brought my free hand to my stomach where it hurt. "What happen, is my baby ok?" I asked as I started to panic again.

Just then Tara came running in to my bed side. "Jess your heart rate is spiking, I need you to calm down." She said in a worried tone. “Juice what happened?”

"She asked about Happy then she coughed and started to panic." Juice said to her. "She wants to know what happen and how the baby is." He said looking straight at her.

As I looked between them all, I saw it in their faces something was wrong. "Tara please tell me my baby is ok." I said still panicking and holding my stomach. "Please Tara tell me what's going on?"

"Jess let me get Dr. Williams so he can check everything out and as soon as Happy is here we can all talk."

"No I need to know now."

"Jess there is no easy way to tell you this, I was hoping to do this when Happy was here." she said rubbing my arm. "You were shot in your lower abdomen and the bullet punctured the placenta, we did everything we could to save the baby but it wasn't….."

I cut her off before she could finish. "No don't say it; I don't want to hear it." I screamed at her and yanked my arm away from her and my hand out of Juices hand. "GET OUT! ALL OF YOU GET OUT!"

"Jess I don't want to leave you." Juice said as he tried to grab my hand but I yanked it away again and winced from the pain it caused when my body jostled from it.

"I SAID GET OUT ALL OF YOU NOW!" I screamed as tears started to roll down my face and held on to my stomach because of the pain I was causing from yelling. "Please just leave." I said softly this time because my throat felt dry and I was in pain.

"Guys let's give her some time alone." Tara said motioning to the door. "Jess just hit the call button if you need anything." She said softly to me as she followed Juice and Chibs out of the room.

When I was alone I completely fell apart holding my stomach, I couldn't hear the words come out of her mouth or have anyone say them out loud to me. I didn't want to believe it, I just wanted to cry and wish my baby was still here with me. The door to my room slowly creaked open and Phil stuck his head in.

"Tara asked me if I could bring you some fresh water." He said showing the cup and pitcher in his hands and I nodded my head to him. He walked over and put the pitcher on the tray and handed me the cup. "Doc if ya need me, I'll be outside the door."