early2000s | fuckshit x oc | mid90s

Feb 6, 2000

"And who the fuck are you?"

I woke up to a yell that happened to be directed toward me. My eyes opened and I was face-to-face with an older version of Lyciana, probably in her early 30s. Although this time I was almost certain this was her sister.

I could barely get a word in to defend myself, the woman just kept on raising her voice.

"Lyciana, if you don't get your ass out here!"

Lyciana made her way to the living room, rubbing her eyes. I could tell that she'd just woken up too.

She whips her head toward Lyciana, pointing in my direction. "Explain this shit."

As Lyciana opens her mouth to reply, she kept on talking.

"I'd love for you to explain why this Samoan lookin' ass nigga is in my house. Let alone sleeping on my couch?"

Damn, do I really look Samoan? Wouldn't be the first time I've heard that.

"Janelle..."

"Janelle my ass," she snaps back.

"Stop it. You're acting like you found him in my room or some shit."

"Girl, this is my house. I don't want random niggas here. Period."

"I was just doing him a favor," Lyciana says, rolling her eyes.

I figured it was time to butt into the conversation before Lyciana got ripped to shreds.

"Yo, I'm sorry to invade your house like this. We were out with some friends last night and she needed a ride home, we figured it'd just be more convenient for me to sleep here than to drive back late."

Lyciana's sister cocks her head sideways, looking at the both of us. "You been drinking?"

Without hesitation, I denied the accusation.

Janelle slowly turned to Lyciana, squinting her eyes at her.

"Well?"

She hesitates. "No."

"Faded?"

"No."

"So you wasn't drunk, wasn't high," Janelle says, folding her arms. "But a nigga had to drive you home. Makes sense."

"Jesus Christ Janelle," Lyciana says, shaking her head, facepalming. "It's not that serious."

"Oh, so we lying too now?"

I felt like I was watching some sort of family sitcom, but I was right in the middle of it. I felt like it was probably best to remove myself from the situation at this point.

"Hey, I should go—"

Janelle whips her head back to me. "I think the fuck not," She says, motioning her index finger downward , telling me to sit back down.

I sat there, stiffened up, and stunned.

"Janelle!" Lyciana exclaims. "Let him go, he didn't do anything."

"Lyciana, watch your mouth," she says, whipping her head in her direction. "Don't worry, I'mma deal with you."

"Oh my God," Lyciana mutters under her breath. She gives me a strong glance, pretending to slice her neck, slowly retreating back to her room.

"Now, lets get this straight," Janelle starts, sitting down next to me. "What were you really doing with my little sister, huh?"

I move forward on the couch cushion. "Nothing but a ride home. If I'm lying, I'm dying."

"If she didn't drink, didn't get high, fuck she need a ride for?"

She had a point, and I felt like it was too early to actually tell her the truth.

"She was tired, it was pretty late."

"Okay, you know what pretty boy?" She says, lighting a cigarette. "I'll let you go this time. I'mma handle her."

You know, for someone who's bugging over what her sister took, she shouldn't be smoking in the house.

"So? You sleep over her house or what?" Ruben asks, taking a hit from the blunt.

"Yeah, but—"

"No fucking way, we got a mega stud over here!"

"First of all Ruben, out of all you niggas we already know I'm the ladies man," I start.

"Oh please," Ray says, laughing.

"Yeah, laugh it up. But for real, it wasn't even like that."

Ruben raises an eyebrow, passing the wood to Fourth Grade, who puts it down. "Fuck you mean 'it wasn't like that'?"

"I slept on the couch. I literally just dropped her off."

Stevie erupts in laughter. "No way. What's gotten into you?"

Fourth Grade chimes in. "The couch?"

"This the first loss Fuckshit has taken."

"Y'all some lame ass niggas," I say, crashing back into the sofa. "I wouldn't have hit regardless, she was faded faded."

"Aight, I can respect you for that," Ruben says, adjusting his hat.

"Thank you."

"I think you're leaving one part out," Ray butts in, with a slight chuckle.

"And what might that be, smart ass?"

"The part where her sister found you on the couch, damn near beat your ass."

I furrow my eyebrows, hitting him on the arm. "Pause. How you know about that?"

"You forget Cici's best friends with my girl?" He says, as everyone bursts into laughter.

"But you are still gonna hit. Right?" Ruben asks, choking on his laughter. "You know, check that shit off the bucket list."

I shake my head, clapping my hands, grinning. "I mean, you know me."

"Hey man, you can do allat shit but maybe not with Cici," Ray interrupts. "That's Lenae's bitch, I'm not tryna be blamed if you fuck Cici up."

"Whatever nigga, don't trip. It's all good."

"I'm serious nigga."