Three Years Later - (Killugon)

Chapter 6: Nightmare and Apology

Killua POV

I woke up from my slumber to the sound of rustling coming from the futon across the room from me. I blinked trying to wake myself up. I glanced over and saw that Gon was stirring. That stirring turned into trembling. Then the trembling turned into flailing.

"No..." Gon whispered.

"Gon?" I tried to get his attention but all I got in return was another quiet "No..."

"Please... don't leave me.." Gon said slightly louder. His voice becoming more prominent.

'Is he having a nightmare?' I got out of the bed and started to make my way towards him but that's when things took a turn. As if in the blink of an eye, Gon started screaming, screeching and flailing his body around as his sad whispers turned into hysterical cries of anguish.

"NO PLEASE!! DON'T LEAVE ME! I SORRY I NEVER MEANT TO HURT YOU! DON'T GO!!" Gon shouted still in his sleep.

"Gon!" My voice full of concern as I quickly went to the aid of my best friend.

"Gon, you're having a nightmare! Wake up!" I said basically and on the verge of tears as I hated seeing Gon like this. He looked so helpless.

"DON'T GO! PLEASE!! IM SO SORRY!!" Gon screamed again.

"GON!!!" I shouted at the top of my lungs with one more violent shake. And with that he was awake. He shot up into a seated position panting like a dog, tears streaming down his face.

"Gon?" I said soft and gently. The complete opposite of what I used to wake him up. He slowly looked to me. He was shaking and his eyes were dull.

"K-Killua?" He said in a pitifully shaky and raspy voice. Without hesitation he quickly pulled me onto the futon with him and held me close and tight continuously apologizing for God knows what.

"Gon it's ok." I said softly as I adjust both of our positions. I was laying on the futon and Gon was laying beside me. His head buried into my chest as we held each other closely. Neither of us wanting to let go. Gon continued to sob on my chest and I let him. Not caring how wet my shirt was from his tears. I just wanted to comfort him. After what seemed like hours, Gon finally calmed down to where we could bring his head up to look at me.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." Gon said softly. I looked back at him.

"Why do you keep apologizing? It's just a nightmare. It's no big de-"

"No! That's not what I meant." Gon said before averting his eyes away from mine.

"What do you mean?" Gon took a deep breath, and then began.

"Ever since I came back home to Whale Island, I've been having nightmares. Nightmares of you leaving me forever because of the way I treated you. I never thought much of it back then cause I was just a stupid, naive little kid. Hell, I still am. But now I realized what I did to you. How much I hurt you. What I put you through because of how selfish and idiotic I was." I didn't know what to say so I just continued to listen.

"I put you through hell, day in and day out and you still stayed by my side. I neglected you and your feelings cause of my own selfish need to avenge my friend and yet you still supported me. I was ready to throw my life away in the most selfish act of 'righteousness' possible. I should've died. I deserved to die. But I didn't because you still helped me. Y-you saved my life w-when I completely disregarded y-your w-wellbeing." Gon started to tear up again. I gently wiped it away with my thumbs still not saying anything. Wanting to make sure he got everything he needed to say off his chest.

"I-I don't deserve a friend like y-you! You've always been s-so selfless. Y-you always kept me in check w-when you knew I was on the verge of d-doing something selfish and would get us all k-killed! I treated you like dirt a-and you still c-cared about me enough to risk both you and Alluka's lives j-just to save m-mine. I don't deserve it. I didn't deserve it and I never will deserve it. Cause I'm a selfish monster. I don't even have the right to call myself your friend. Let alone best friend." Gon didn't say anything for a few moments so I assumed he was finish. Now it's my turn.

"Idiot..." I murmured still cupping his cheek with the hand I used to wipe his tear, caressing his cheek with my thumb.

"W-what?" He looked at me puzzled

"If you think I'm still mad at you about that then you're dead wrong. Hell, I wasn't mad at you to begin with." Gon looked at me with shock in his eyes.

"B-but i betrayed y-you.." he said, his voice still shaky

"It's like you once told me. If it's you, then I don't mind being betrayed." Gon gave me another shocked expression.

"Look, yeah sure maybe some of those things you said hurt at the time, and yeah it was stupid for you to attempt to throw your life away like that but guess what? You're my..." I hesitated for a second. I don't know why. I felt reluctant to say the two words cause maybe I wanted to be able to call him something else. Something more. But for now I'll suck it up. "...you're my best friend Gon. And nothing will ever change that. No matter how many stupid decisions you make, I'll always be there to clean up your mess. I'm not going anywhere Gon. Not anymore. I promise."

Tears began to sprinkle down his face again as he stared at me before giving me a weak smile.

"Thank you Killua." Gon said in basically a whisper.

"No problem Gon." I whispered smiling back at him. Gon then nuzzled his head back onto my chest. His breath was still a little shaky.

"Killua?"

"Yeah Gon?"

"Can we stay like this for the rest of the night?"

I felt a warm sensation creep up on my face as I started blushing but sucked it up as I actually secretly wanted this.

"Of course." I responded

"Goodnight Killua."

"Goodnight Gon."

Soon after that, we both fell asleep in each other's arms.