Rock, Paper, Scissors

19: Please be patient

It was Tuesday, the first tutoring session. I was already at Noah's house when the doorbell signaled Nick's arrival. He greeted us per usual nonchalantly and set at the dining table across from us. We had our books and notes in front of us, ready to attack the monster that was calculus. With a stern look in our eyes, we looked up at our professor as if to show him how serious we were.

Nick shifted uncomfortably in his chair before speaking, "Okay, I need to know your level, do you have any test with you?" My stomach dropped as I remembered the outcome of the last test.

Noah went up to his room to fetch one of his tests while I handed to Nick the test I had kept in my notebook as a reminder of my disgrace. He looked at it as if he were scrutinizing every little detail. The chair beside me moved and I looked at Noah embarrassed. Nick would think I'm stupid, he probably already does but that test was the confirmation. The worst part was that I had good grades, I wasn't a bad student at all, but everything related to math was a struggle for me.

He handed back the test without a word, taking Noah's and analyzing it with the same focus. After some Mississippi's of silence, he stopped. He looked at us as if he was thinking about what to do next, probably shocked by what he had seen. Noah and I shared a knowing look. "The good thing is that you're about the same level," he said. "That will make it easier for me. Noah, you have some issues with certain concepts, nothing a little bit of work won't solve. But you Julie, you don't even know the basics." I grimaced at those words and a look of sympathy crossed his face.

"I'll start with you Noah." He explained to him some concepts, I tried to follow but lost myself. After Noah understood it, Nick gave him some exercises to practice.

Nick then turned to me, "We would take longer, you really need to understand the basics, otherwise you won't be able to understand this." He opened my book on the first page and started his explanation. I didn't get it at first, so he explained me another way, and another, and another, until he found an example that worked for me. He was really good at teaching.

We went over a few concepts before Noah finished his work. He got almost everything right. Nick reviewed what he got wrong, explaining what mistakes Noah had made. They then jumped to another concept. Like before Nick explained first and then gave him exercises, going back to me afterward. I didn't get exercises, not yet.

After two hours of this, I felt like my head was going to explode, but I was happy. For the first time, I didn't feel stupid, I didn't feel like math was a foreign language. I felt as if I learned more in these couple of hours with Nick than in the years of math I had. He was definitely a great teacher. We called it a day, the three of us tired of all the numbers and letters and signs.

We thanked Nick but before he left, he told us that he could come by Saturday afternoon to tutor us again. "It's really more for you Julie, you have a lot of catching up to do."

I accepted immediately but Noah said he had to take his brother to the dentist. Great a full-on tutoring session with just me and Nick. I could already imagine my brain cells melting. I went home, waving goodbye to Nick and preparing myself for my mother's interrogation. She had seen him drop me off from school one day and had created a full romantic movie in her head. How was she going to react after I told her he was giving me a private lesson?

I couldn't find the courage to tell her once I got home. At dinner, she asked about the tutoring lesson and I took the opportunity to tell my parents about Saturday. She clapped her hands in glee and I had to stop her in her tracks. "Don't start imagining things, mom. He's just helping us out."

"Of course." She grinned while my father looked like he was trying to bend his fork. "Your dad and I will be out of town though, we should be back by four, so you know the drill."

"No funny things while you're out, yes, yes, I know," I tell her, feeling my cheeks burn just from the idea of something happening between us. Just stop messy brain. That would be so weird.

The week flew by and Saturday came. The doorbell rang and I jumped from the sofa to open the door. Embarrassment crept on me as I saw Nick standing in the doorway. He was stylish, wearing a red and black flannel shirt with black jeans and his leather jacket, while I was standing there in my weekend wear: sweatpants, slippers, and a messy bun in my hair. I brushed the feeling away and invited him in.

I guided him to my room where I had everything we needed. He took the room in while I prepared a place for him at the desk. I'm sure the light pink walls and fluffy plushies were a surprise for him. Noah and Micah had also been surprised by it back then.

Nick sat in the chair next to mine and we started our lesson where we had left off. At some point, Nick decided it was time to see if I had learned anything. He gave me a couple of "basic" exercises to practice. Something inside of me shifted when I realized I understood what the questions were actually asking for and my brain started solving the problem before on its own. With a full sense of confidence, I started scribbling.

I pulled away once I was finished for Nick to assess it. I caught a small smile tucking on his lips and I felt proud, that is until the smile left the place to frown. Shoot.

"It's good, you just got this wrong," he said, pointing at the third question on the sheet. He started explaining what I did wrong, but I could only focus on the sight in front of me.

"What happened?" I grabbed his bruised hand with mine. Pink covered each knuckle, but what had caught my attention was the grazed skin. I recognized these types of bruises; I've seen them before.

He tried to pull his hand away, but I wouldn't let him. "What happened?" I repeated.

"None of your business." That answer again, but this time it hurt more. Yesterday was Friday, he rarely could hang out with us on Fridays. Were these bruises the result of his secret? Was he really mixed in something dangerous and illegal? Concern filled my heart and mind and I realized I didn't want to know his secret just to protect my friends, but also to protect him. That was why his answer hurt so much.

"Why do you have to be such a jerk! I'm trying to be your friend!" I snapped; I was fuming from the frustration. I had been trying, didn't I? No matter what I had told myself, no matter what excused I found, whenever I hang out with him and Tyler, whenever I joked and laughed with them, whenever I talked to them, I had been letting them in. I had been trying to trust them and become their friends,

"What for? You'll leave as they all do," he blurted. His jaw clenched, he got up and shuffled through his backpack taking out a notebook. He handed it to me.

"Take it. I have to go." He zipped the backpack, threw it over his shoulder, and walked to the door.

"Wait!" I called him, following him to the hall. My parents opened the front door as I was about to grab his jacket.

"Oh hi!" My mother greeted him with a full grin. "You must be Nick. I'm Catherine and this is Mark."

"Nice to meet you, Mrs. and Mr. Delgado."

"Oh please, ditch that. We're on a first-name basis with Julie's friends." Well, he was not my friend, that's what I wanted to say to her. "You want to join us for dinner?"

"Thank you, but I have to go now. Maybe next time." But there wouldn't be a next time, would it?

"Sure. Well, thank you for helping Julie, since she lost–." The look on my face stopped her before she said too much. "We'll see you soon then. Thanks again." My parents left for the kitchen to unpack the groceries they carried.

Nick opened the door and walked out without sparing me a glance. Jerk. I stared at him as he got to his car and drove off. I ran to my room infuriated.