jon arbuckle x reader

prison

we are at the prison to search for murphy.

luckily, these nice guys gave us a lift so that we didn't have to walk so far.

those guys were the police.

luckily, this is exactly where we needed to be.

during lunch hour, jon and i meet up to find murphy. turns out there's a lot of bald men in prison!

jon had the brilliant idea of going up and interrogating every single one of them.

Bald guy number 1

"nice bald head."

"i know, thanks."

"nice for SLAPPING" jon slaps his head and laughs.

his arm was twisted backwards and broken.

Bald guy number 2

"hey you, what're you doing with that shiny bald head of yours? it cant be thinking, right?"

we don't need to explain the specifics of this one.

Bald guy number 3

"hey, baldie. your name murphy? you got a death wish?" jon says confidently

the guy turns around. "what's it to ya?"

well, his name was murphie.

"we HATE the balds"

———

so. murphie made us his bitch.

we have to follow him around and if we don't do what he says we will be dealt with by donald.

"hey, fishstick" (thats jons new name)

"what"

"go steal me an extra chicken nugget"

"you're a baffoon. you're INSANE. i cant do that" jon laughs nervously

"get. me. the chicken."

"no!"

"DONALD!!!"

"FINE IM GOING" jon goes and steals a chicken nugget for murphie. in return, jon gets his head stuck in a toilet.