From Me To You: A Tale Untold

Santosh

8th April, 2019.

Dear Diary,

I really don't know where to start, to be honest. There is so much to say, and it seems I can fill pages and pages today; yet the words refuse to stop flowing. Remember Pari, a colleague of mine? I'm sure I've talked about her before. She's a bit shy and reserved. Doesn't interact much with everyone in the office. She just broke down. I think it was a word that triggered her. She was typing a letter and suddenly she started crying like anything. No one cared to ask. Can you imagine that? Sheesh, people have no empathy these days. Probably her image of a cold lady was to blame.  I was the only one to rush to her. On gentle prodding,  she just pointed the word abuse to me and choked up. No words were needed. It was clear, Pari was a victim of abuse.

She was mentally, physically abused by her in-laws at home. Her mother-in-law and sister-in-law had made her life miserable.  She tried informing her husband at first so he could intervene and when that failed, she approached her parents for help. They were like, "That's a part of life, it's your destiny. You have to grin and bear it. Don't even think about leaving your husband or divorce. What will the people say when they learn you have returned to us? It will tarnish our family name and honour. That home is your home now, Pari." To make matters worse, she's pregnant! Her unborn child is her priority at the moment. With no place to go, she has only two options: compromise or suicide. Pari loves her child very much, so suicide is out of question.  She has only compromise left. Waiting to see what step she takes.

The word compromise is multidimensional in so many aspects. It is capable of inflicting wounds without drawing blood. Pari's story, her tears, brought back memories of similar circumstances—of a past long buried. Another time. Another version of myself. I was so agitated, I just couldn't concentrate on what HR's words. I had zoned out. She was like, "Santosh—you there? It seems you are not with me. I mean, you are here, but your mind is elsewhere. Everything okay? I can sense something is bothering you. Care to share? Is it Pari's incident?" 

I was like, "Umm... yes, no—I'm okay. A little tired as usual, Lara. It's been a hectic month with training the interns, the new issue launch and all the publicity stuff going on. Thanks for your concern, my friend!"  To convince her, I forced myself to smile.  Or maybe, it is me who needs to be convinced that everything is okay? Maybe, after all these years, some wounds have yet to heal. There are yet some words left unsaid. Maybe, it's time for my silence to speak. I don't know... Wish I knew. Wish I knew.