Fresh meat

14

*BILLIES POV*

we just stared at each other.no words.no movement.just eye contact. until she noticed me looking her up and down trying to keep focus on her face. she went to the sink and washed her mouth out.

"okay" was all she said. "um okay?" i said confused. "yes okay, meet me in the infirmary in a hour." she said looking at me. "yea..ok" i said stuttering over my sentence. i turned around and began to leave but i had to be dumb and turn around towards her. "wait why th-" (dramatic pause).

i was cut off mid sentence by y/n being half naked in front of me. i unconsciously stared at her beautiful body not realizing i was staring until she yelled my name. i looked at her face and she had a little smile on. "like what you see?" she said in a teasing tone. "um-i- why do you want to meet in the infirmary?" i said trying to change the subject.

y/n chuckled. "i have a check up with the nurse and it's probably the most private place here" she said in a duh tone. "right..um how are you yk ever since your accident?" i said trying to make conversation. "billie?" y/n said in a soft tone. "yes?". "get tf out" she said aggressively. damn bossy much?

*YOUR POV*

"ok everything seems to be good,in 2 weeks is your next and last checkup" the nurse said. "okay" i mumbled. "you okay? you seem a little off" she asked. "just thinking about some stuff" i said. "stuff as in billie?"she said in a teasing tone. I chuckled. "not just her but mostly her".

"mhm,y/n you should tell her how you feel". "i want to i really do but she's dating my friend and to be honest i don't really know how i feel. if i knew how she felt i would know how i feel. i need to know her feelings in order to understand mine... this shit is so exhausting and frustrating." i groaned.

"so what do you do when your frustrated?". i sighed and put my head in my hands rubbing my temples. "i do sum dumb shit like,go back to my ex or fuck people and ghost them a day later...or i isolate myself at home and just bring myself down about little shit".

" you really remind me of myself. i did the same exact thing when i was your age. i always let people hurt me and manipulate me and i somehow always given them a second chance.And i always thought that i was the problem or there was something wrong with me when someone didn't feel the same towards me. "

"imma give you some real shitty advice. when the person you like doesn't like you back you should right down a list about all the things YOU like about yourself. it's good to remind yourself about your favorite things about you. and it's ok to feel dejected if that's how you feel,just don't allow yourself to believe that another persons feelings towards you determines anything about you."

i looked at her. not knowing a response to her not so shitty advice. she was right though. "shitty advice? you sure your supposed to be a nurse?" i half smiled. "girl please,therapist see people cry and break down and shit. if someone broke down in front of me i would cry with them cause i wouldn't know what to do". we both laughed.

"hey i've been looking for you" a familiar voice said. i turned my head and saw lola. my ex. "i'll give you to some privacy". the nurse left the room and left me and lola alone. bad idea. "what do you want" i said aggressively. "i miss you". i scoffed at her response. "god you are such an asshole,i'm not gonna get back with you because you claim you miss me.that shit might work with other people but not me." i snapped.

"but i really do miss you y/n, i want you back,i'm sorry for what i did to you,hurting you was the last thing i wanted to do." lola said. i just looked at her with a disgusted face. she was only saying this shit because i was the only person that loved her and put up with her shit. don't get me wrong i still love her with all my heart. but she hurt me.badly.

"you hurt me lola". "i know and i'm sorry i really am. i still hate myself for doing what i did to you. you were the only person that loved me and made me feel like the only person in the world. being with you made me the happiest person ever and i couldn't ask for more.no matter what shitty and hurtful things i said to you. you didn't leave me. you stayed. when we were together i stayed out of the streets and i didn't get into any trouble.and when you did leave well...now look where i'm at." she laughed causing me to laugh. "so please baby just give me another chance and i promise i won't fuck up." she said practically begging me at this point.

i examined her face and i could see that she actually meant this from the bottom of her heart. i grabbed her by her shirt and smashed her lips onto mine. our salty tears mixing. what about billie?

*NO ONES POV*

billie was excited to talk to y/n but also nervous. As she entered the infirmary she froze when she saw y/n kissing lola. "please don't hurt me again lola." y/n said tears falling down her face. "i won't. i promise"
Billie just stood there. frozen. not knowing if she should interrupt or if she should leave. guess what she did.she left. she left knowing she fucked up by ignoring y/n feelings and hers.  

Billie learned her lesson that day.

you should always tell someone how you feel before it's to late.

but was it really

to late?