꧁PHAT ASS꧂

My dad: I don’t want to EVER hear you listen to that new Lil Nas X song. It is the devils music.
          
          Me and my little brother: No.

BRB gonna go ride that stripper pole down to hell

whats up we havent talked in a  while

Ya’ll know what shifting realities is?

Homophobic Christian women: "My religion says that being a gay is a sin"
          
          Me: Well you religion also says,for you to stfu. So why don't you listen to it. 
          
          
          
          
          
          1 Timothy 2:12 I do not permit a woman to,teach or to exercise authority over a man; she must be quiet.
          
          
          
          
          Also the government may protect you for,saying dumb shit but that doesn't mean I won't beat the crap of of you.

What happened to @-ARMYTHOLOGY?

Scotty doesn't know that Fiona and me
          Do it in my van every Sunday
          She tells him she's in church but she doesn't go
          Still she's on her knees and Scotty doesn't know

Why is my brothers search history "beauty with big tits"?

I hate to break it to y'all but namjoon is gay. I know y'all think he has a wife and kids but he doesn't. He can't drive and gays can't drive. Also he likes frogs so it's pretti obvious. 
          
          
          
          Who wants to commit arson with me?

I've now become a criminal minds addict so I'm gonna profile the hell out of y'all.