Detetetective Sherlock Bolognese

Hello my lovely ladies and gentlemen.
It is I, the greatest detetetective, Sherlock Bolognese.
I'm ready to solve all your needs. No, I don't mean sex and any of the suspicious stuff. I mean cases, of course. Don't think so pervertly, ladies. I'm hard to get, you know. You have to give it all if you want me. 
Cough cough, now I'm getting out of topic. I'm very sorry for that. I'm ready to solve all the cases, even the most difficult ones. If you're worthy, of course. 
Oh. What do I mean by that? Well.. If you want me to solve your case, just text me what you need. Of course you need to explain why I would try to solve your case. I'm a busy person, you know.
You're asking me what's my favourite drink? Well, that's quite an interesting question. It's black coffee.
Anyways, I'm sorry for getting off topic again.
I also have an assistant, Timmy Tomatosauce. He's quite good assistant, even though he can be a bit.. irritating sometimes. But it's alright.
Well, that's my description. 
Thank you for reading.