so. im going to be here for constructive criticism okay?
"The bet" is bad.
there is no ponctuation and its one entire sentence in each chapter.
so suggestion:
edit it
hey, my names Natalie, i love all your storys, my first story i read in this app was one of yours and then i started reading other ones but you gave me a great impretion of wattad and im thankful of that.
keep writing.......