Jimin's P.O.V
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-SUNDAY MORNING-
What are the laws of confusion?
No... Better yet, what are the spiraling levels of confusion?
Those were my thoughts. I had woken up today with randomized imagines, and it was nearly unbearable to sort out. My general train of thought was pristine, filed into cabinets, labeled into folders, and binded into binders. And after last night's unexpected events, it shook up everything within.
It was utterly baffling to me.
I nearly thought I had dreamt it. That when I woke up, it would be like none of it ever transpired; but I could still feel it on my skin. The tingling on my hands was everlasting, and the feeling of Jungkook's name on my lips-- weighed heavy, I couldn't escape it.
So it winded me down the path; to the befuddling questions.
What level of confusion was I on?
And was I any closer to finding out the answers to all of my emotions combined?
And the biggest inquiry of them all, what was the answer?
I sat up from my bed, rubbing my eyes briefly to, peeking around my room, scanning the bookshelf, ogling the nightstand and then--
"Ah, shit!" I perked up, my heart nearly jumping out of my chest at the muffled pained scream and loud thump on the white wall outside of my bedroom door.
I sighed, quickly remembering the arrangement of last night's conversation that interestingly ended up with Jungkook sleeping just beyond my room door. I scoffed, finding myself chuckling at his bizarre thought patterns.
Eventually, I hauled myself from my bed, trudging over to the door where I could pick out faint mutters and complaints. I nearly wanted to listen in for any additional things, but decided against it, opening the door promptly.
Not long after, I was met with the face of my roommate who's head was at my feet. His eyes were closed as he brutishly rubbed at the center of his forehead.
"Wow, you managed to sleep out here. That's dutiful." I stated as Jungkook groaned below me.
"Dutiful my ass," he huffed out, "why are walls so freaking-- wall-y?"
I shook my head.
How does he just come up with these things?
"Please, get off of my floor. I need to actually leave my room at some point." I demanded, tempted to nudge Jungkook with my foot.
Jungkook sat up, running a hand through his dark locks. His eyes opened just barely, squinting at me. "You wanna do me a favor and kiss it better, princess?"
I rolled my eyes, feeling like I had no choice but to deflect. "What did you sleep here for? You have your own bed that you paid to lay in." Jungkook yawned, stretching his hands above his head. Afterward, he stood up, gathering his blanket from the carpeted floor. I stepped back as Jungkook regained his natural height.
I watched as he leaned on the wall behind him, crossing his arms-- his chest puffed out further. "I paid to be your roommate, and to be a good one-- and being your personal throne was just a lovely add on."
I hummed. "You're despicably good with words. It's infuriating."
Jungkook let out a dry laugh, raising his eyebrows. "Am I now? So when I start talking I just turn into a pied piper for you? That's sort of hot."
I rolled my eyes, reeling myself to close the door. "Not even close... You seem to slip out of answering everything I ask of you."
He shrugged. "So do you, your majesty."
I nodded, as his actions alluded into the perfect example. "Just like that."
Jungkook smirked, snickering. "You're interested in what decisions I make now? Ah, you're adorable, princess."
I felt my cheeks swarm with heat, but I put my foot to the ground. "You are so..." Just as I was beginning to pull away from the dead end conversation. I watched Jungkook lift himself from the wall, quickly trying to wedge a word in regretfully.
So mercifully, I allowed it.
"I- I worry about you." Jungkook admitted, his voice light with a serious tone and edge. My eyebrows furrowed, not quite catching onto his vague 'you know what I mean' explanation.
"That's unnecessary--"
"I pushed you really hard yesterday... Going out, the talking, the touching. It's a lot, and I know you know it's a lot. So I wanted to be there for you-- just in case if... If something were to happen." Jungkook's voice whittled into a run on sentence, an ongoing pour of his open mind. I knew he didn't think much before he said certain things; and often, he would just skate past those words.
But every once in a while, he'd say something astonishing.
And it brought back the token of fear that Jungkook expressed to me not too long ago about last Thursday.
The day became the place holder for one of the worst attacks I had since highschool. It was a devastating memory, slightly blurry and equally as agonizing. I tried not to think about it much, knowing that it wouldn't benefit me if I kept reliving it, even if I was just remembering.
Through the days and nights that have surfed by, it still was settled within me.
And apparently, it was embedded within Jungkook too. And by the looks of it, he wasn't going to forget about it either.
"Well, I'm doing okay. Yesterday was arguably more complicated. You're complicated as well... You aren't alone in your worriedness." I stated, attempted what people call-- reassurance. That isn't a strong suit of mine since dealing with emotions that aren't my own hasn't been something I needed to do.
"Complicated and worried, huh? Sounds like a good morning recipe to me." Jungkook's small, joyful smile returned to his face.
He nodded and he stepped up about a couple inches. "You think two complicated, worried, and glorious human beings could eat breakfast before noon on a Sunday?" His long winded approach stalled my thoughts for a few split seconds just before Jungkook cupped his hands to his mouth and whispered in an unfamiliar cartoon-ish voice, "great answer, princess! Yes, they can!"
Somehow it coaxed my lips to twitch into a smile.
Does he have an off button?
I crossed my arms to differ. "That all depends if you ever remove yourself from this very spot."
Jungkook hummed with a doubtful expression, walking backward from my door slowly. "What're you talking about, princess? I've had telekinetic powers since... Like, I was a fetus."
"Really?" I playfully asked.
"Mhm, I had a cool name and everything in school... They called me 'Jeon Jungkook, International playboy with telekinesis' It was awesome." He then turned around and headed toward the kitchen area. Only then, was when I released my final thoughts.
"That's a highly unusual name!"
Within a few seconds, Jungkook shouted back-- his pride nearly visible wafting in the air.
"It was incredible!"
////
For the remainder of the morning, after freshening up, I stay in my room with the door closed for two reasons exactly.
One, I was entirely way too cold to move for some odd reason, and two, Jungkook convinced me to stay inside my room for a surprise he suddenly had thought of. This all resulted in Jungkook also making breakfast for both of us; and basically, this was either going to have an outcome of complete chaos or an outcome of underwhelming pancakes-- or whatever identity the redolent that hung in the air had.
It took a lot out of me not to barrel out of my room too seek what might have fallen or may have broken. It was eating me on the inside as I walked around, feeling my phone buzzing even four feet away from me on the pillowsof my bed. My desperate tendencies were showing from the lack of entertainment, gradually ripping through my mess of a brain.
And as expected, it had won.
I made my way over to my bed to see text messages shuttled out from my coworkers.
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-GROUP MESSAGE-
JM: Park Jimin
KT: Kim Taehyung
YG: Min Yoongi
KT: Okay you guys, I'm going to need some of your opinions! I'm going out tonight!
YG: Please do not send those photos again. This is a business group chat!
KT: Why not? I think I look great.
YG: It is Sunday morning. You have no means to be dressed like that this early.
KT: I don't think Minnie got to see the pictures. Let's give them one more show!
YG: I am going back to bed.
KT: (1 image attached)
KT: (1 image attached)
JM: Cheetah print seems to fit you.
KT: AH! Where have you been!?
JM: I have been in my room for about thirty minutes now.
KT: That isn't what I meant.
KT: Is everything okay with you? Is your roommate being a slob?
JM: I hope not... And nothing is wrong. I haven't eaten yet though.
KT: Are you planning to?
JM: Yes, but Jungkook is taking a very long time 'preparing'.
KT: NO.
KT: WAY.
YG: Well, this is intriguing.
KT: YOU HAVE TO SAY SOMETHING NOW.
KT: HE'S MAKING YOU FOOD-- you're eating it.
KT: YOU'RE TYPING HIS NAME-- he's not a stranger.
KT: I don't know what happened. But we clearly missed out on it.
KT: Are you going to come to work tomorrow glowing?
_______
Overwhelmed by the rapid messaging from Taehyung's end, I typed back a brief answer.
_______
JM: I don't know what my skin has to do with this, but I'm sure overly glowy skin is a medical issue.
JM: And I'm only here because I'm not allowed to leave my room.
KT: Uh, why?
JM: No need to explain, but--
________
There was a pounding knock that resonated from the opposite side of my door, my heart nearly stopped at the startling noise. I glanced up from my phone to respond.
"Give me a moment! Don't knock on my door like that!" I then restored my attention to my short-lived group message.
________
JM: Nevermind, I am going to eat now... I guess. Please don't flood the chat with more pictures. You might give Yoongi a brain aneurysm.
KT: Sure.
KT: Happy for you! Enjoy your little date :)
________
I didn't waste any time on replying as my fingers and my thoughts had blanked, I put my phone into my pajama pants pocket, and cleared my throat; it felt dry like a tumbleweed blowing through a vast desert.
Date?
Yes, I knew exactly what that word meant.
It was horrid, an unsavory word I definitely didn't want to be attached to. I had been on countless dates in the past, none of them lasting, and never dynamic or physically enjoyable. Only one stood out to me, but it was the most abysmal, atrocious, encounter I had ever been through.
9 years ago...
I felt myself falling, slipping into a dark head space as I dwelled on this word, letting it catch.
"Hey princess, you coming out soon? Your throne misses you very much!" I snapped my head to the closed door, inhaling deeply before traveling over to it.
Once I had finally pulled the door back, the sweet aroma intensified. Jungkook was standing against the wall with what one would call, jazz hands.
"Why're you doing that with your hands?" Jungkook paused, looking at his fingers, then back at me.
"Mh, I don't know. But you can leave your room now, which means you and I get to eat." Jungkook beamed, giving strange finger guns and snapping.
I rolled my eyes exiting my room with my arms crossed, taking each step closer to the dining table. I was dumbfounded when I saw there wasn't a single thing on the table. I stopped in my tracks.
Jungkook, who followed up behind me spoke. "I know, I know, shocking..." I heard the younger male chuckle as I turned around to face him, feeling my impatience flaring up. Just when I was going to complain, Jungkook began to walk off toward the living room. My eyes tracked him until he was plopping on the floor.
That was when I focused on the surroundings. I gasped, looking at the golden brown plates of syrupy soaked bread and the floor, which was overspread with a large cream colored comforter and white pillows to complement them.
"You made toast." I stated the obvious, but Jungkook differed.
"It's actually 'French Toast' to be exact..." He then scooted forward, adjusting his plate and picking up a utensil, "... It's fancier."
"It's messier," I concluded, making Jungkook put down his fork and smirk.
"Who doesn't like it messy?" I didn't have a response, so I avoided the topic's continuation.
"Come on, have a seat... We're gonna watch a movie together." I squinted, unsure of what Jungkook's taste in movies would be like. I walked to my supposed seat to the left of Jungkook on the floor. My hand, before I sat down, automatically reached out to widen the gap between Jungkook and I, but I was interrupted when he spoke out.
"Don't move it... We're just going to watch a movie and then you can get up and be as far away from me as possible," he gave me his 'serious face', "is that okay, princess?"
I swallowed. "It is fine... I will just sit down."
Jungkook kept his gaze on me as I settled onto my pillow, looking at the plate before me.
"Alright, now that we're in business... How about you start eating. Sorry for taking so long." I nodded, using the fork and knife to cut into the toast, the syrup dripping from the soft bread. I smelled it swiftly before putting in my mouth, allowing myself to taste the dish.
"Okay, okay... You like it? It took me like two tries to get the bread brown enough... " I finished chewing and glanced at Jungkook while buzzing with excitement.
It was honestly amazing.
"That was palatable... Thank you." Jungkook 's broad grin spread on his lips.
"Be serious... I know it was better than... 'whatever word you just used'.
Tell me, princess... Was it like floating on a cloud, walking on the moon, and soaring into the stars?" Jungkook raised an eyebrow while starting to dig into his own dish for the first time.
"Maybe." I answered in short.
"Nope... You gotta say the whole thing." Jungkook demanded, his mouth still stuffed with food.
"Chew before you talk. You're going to choke if you don't." It took several seconds for Jungkook to reply, but he ended up ignoring my warning for the most part.
"I'll start, you finish, okay? It was like..." Jungkook went silent, waiting on me to complete his sentence of praise.
I blew out a large puff of air. "It was like floating on a cloud, walking on the moon, and soaring into the stars... Is that all?" Jungkook's smile seemed infinite, like no matter what I said, he would stare at me like his prized possession.
"You said it perfect, princess."
Jungkook swiped through multiple movies and shows that he could've clicked on. He surfed past the romance, the thrillers, and the psychological just to end up at the movies of his liking. 'The Nightmare Before Christmas'.
I looked at him with confusion.
"This is a children's animation."
Jungkook pursed his lips, selecting the movie. "It's a childhood favorite of mine... Thought I would share it."
I stayed silent, Jungkook's words still pending in my brain.
A few blurry, useless images resurfaced as the mention of another lothesome word played in my head.
Childhood.
"Do you have any good memories from then? Like... Anything that made you happy?" I heard Jungkook ask as my breathing rate started to pick up.
I had to stop it.
Before I ruined everything.
Before it was too late.
"No, and I would rather not talk about that." I stated, not leaving Jungkook any leeway to detest.
But as perusal, he found a way.
He paused the film. "Is there even a second... A passing minute you enjoyed? That you can remember?" I kept my eyes straight forward; I didn't want to lose my grip just yet.
"Nightmares always come back. Dreams never do... That is how I function." I couldn't sit there and go down memory lane of why only the worst and most belligerent moments stood out. I knew it was a matter of mentality and Jungkook-- albeit he was interested-- wouldn't have even a slither of an idea what to do about it.
"Then what would you say for the present? Is it more of a nightmare or is it a dream?" I hesitated, wanting to go avoid saying too much.
"It's... I feel like I'm in a dream that's going to end soon. These coming days are becoming increasingly more unbelievable." I gave myself a moment to catch my breath as I felt my concentration fading.
"Why do you say that--"
"After you got here, things have been changing--" I cut Jungkook off.
"And you're ready for that. You're okay with it, because you trust that I will be here. You trust that I will help you. You trust that I will lo--" Jungkook's abrupt stall in his monologue shatter my thoughts.
He's holding back too.
"I-- yesterday you did everything you thought you'd be afraid of. You did all of that... You can do it again. You can face your fears again." Jungkook had a strong sense of certainty in each phrase.
Like he just knew...
Like he was so sure...
But I wasn't.
I wasn't sure I could accomplish what I did the other day alone.
I wasn't sure if Jungkook knew that.
"You say you'll stay with me." I began.
"And I promise that." Jungkook snipped back, not letting my words get the chance to hang in the air.
"And if I needed, you'll--"
"Be with you." Jungkook turned his whole body to face me.
It sounded too good to be true.
Like a fantasy.
Like a dream.
Like I could blink, and everything would just flash before my eyes.
And the only way I could savor it was to blink slower, breathe calmly, stop thinking about everything.
And start trusting, start believing, start slowing down the flash.
And be in it.
For as long as the world will allow.
I made eye contact with Jungkook.
The only man I wondered about.
The only man that made me smile for the craziest reasons.
The only man that seemed to be the answer to many questions I had before.
Maybe that was because he was the answer...
The exception to the rule.
"I can't believe... It feels like you're not even real. The things that you say... I- I want it to be real. Tell me it's real." I whispered, my eyes piling up with tears that I tried to blink away.
Jungkook gave me a half smile.
"I'm real, Jimin... Being a hologram is less cool anyway...", He winked and then continued,
"... Am I being upgraded from throne to prince right now?"
I laughed, breathy, wiping at my eyes to prevent any tears from falling.
"Do I have a say?"
Jungkook clicked tounge. "You're right. I hereby dub thee, Sir Jeon Jungkook as Park Jimin's handsome Prince. He shall be by his side, hand in hand for eternity."
Jungkook held out his palm to me. I sucked in a good amount of air, not having the capability to move.
"Don't leave me hanging princess... You've got me now. It's not official if you don't--"
There were so many ways I could've refused.
But I couldn't allow myself to step backwards into fear.
I couldn't allow myself to push forward into the thick of it-- the flash.
I pulled my hand away from my lap and dropped it down on Jungkook's palm. My skin crawled as soon I came in contact, my fingers were itching to pull away. My chest tightened, as I was feeling faint.
Jungkook then applied more pressure and security to my hand, maneuvering his fingers in-between mine.
My arm felt numb, my mind was blank.
"I'll make your dream the best one you've ever had, Park Jimin."
I was dazed, completely out of it.
But somehow, even though it scared me, it felt absolutely right.
It was him.
And he went by Jeon Jungkook.
Who would've thought?
As I was staring to Jungkook's eyes, I felt a hard vibration rattle in my pocket. Jungkook's smile started to diminish as his eyes started to grow more concerned.
"You want to get that?" I nodded, reaching into my pocket to pull out my phone.
I looked down the screen, scanning over the caller ID.
It was the same number from last night.
"Uh, I-- I'll be right back." I informed Jungkook before pulling my hand away from his warm hold, I then sprouted up into a standing position to scurry away to my bedroom.
Why?
Just why now of all times?
Reluctantly, I pressed on the green button to answer the call, I waited patiently for the person on the other line to speak.
_________
-PHONE CALL-
JM= Park Jimin
EO: Eomma
EO: Son? Please say you're listening.
________
I didn't give her any sign of my presence, I knew she had more to say-- more to ask-- so I waited until she went on.
________
EO: You haven't been answering my calls, and I don't know how you're doing. You know what state this puts me in. I- I really need to talk... I need to know if you're okay.
JM: Why are you calling at this time?
________
There was an eerie pause on her end.
________
EO: I haven't seen you in such a long time, Jimin. I was wondering if we could visit or... I just need to see you in person. I miss having a son. Please... Say you'll think about it?
________
This was the part...
Where the dream ends...
And the nightmares come back...
And reality settles in.
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A/N: SOOO... HOW WAS IT?!
Here's me apologizing about publishing late! I want to try and keep the schedule of every two weeks, as I have been planning a winter/Christmas story to write over the winter break after my final exams!
Thank you for being patient!
Q: HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT JUNGKOOK CHANGING IN STATUS?
Q: YOUR THOUGHTS ON JIMIN'S REALIZATION?
Q: SHOULD JIMIN MOVE FORWARD WITH HIS EOMMA'S WISH?
Well as you guys know...
You'll just have to wait and see for the next chapter!
Love you guys!
XxxS