Peeta's POV
I lay in my bed, staring at the beige hospital ceiling, counting the dots. It felt like years since I'd last seen sunlight. Or the people I loved. Or anyone really, for that matter.
I missed being outside. I missed my family and my friends. I missed Finnick and Annie and Prim and Effie and Haymitch and Roody and even Almond but most of all, I longed for Katniss. I longed for her soft touch, her fierce gray eyes, and her long, shiny dark hair. I longed for our conversations that stretched hours into the night, and the loving touches that followed. I longed for our cuddles and stories and-
Stop it, I told myself firmly. This will only make you feel worse.
So I gave up, wiped a tear from my cheek and resumed the counting of ceiling dots. 467, 468, 469, 470...
As I counted, I hummed a faint melody that had been playing in the back of my head since I got to the hospital. Looking back, I think it was a song that I had started to write, about Katniss, actually, and never finished. I sighed miserably. It's impossible that it was only two months ago... right?
But still, I kept humming, bringing the melody to life. Before long, I had almost an entire song recorded in my head. And it felt good. It felt good having something to do. Somewhere to vent. Some way to express myself. And best of all, it reminded me of Katniss.
I picked up my printed hospital report, flipped it over, and, using a nearly-dead ballpoint pen, scrawled:
"I used to believe in love;
One day it was all taken away.
It's hard to keep going at first;
But romance isn't a game.
I thought it was all a lie,
until I looked into your beautiful eyes.
They concealed all my fears;
I forgot about my tears,
And I knew you were the one for me.
You control the strings to my heart.
You are what keeps me going.
It wasn't until then that I thought it wasn't true.
But you hold the strings to my heart.
Then that day came and I wanted to stay,
Yet my heartache still came.
But you took it away.
You took it all away.
So just hold me close,
Never let me go and carry me away.
We'll wash it all away with this song,
And make it in this world.
To have and to hold, is all I need.
To never leave your side,
to stay with your soul and never part.
Our souls could part...but I'd follow you all the waaa-yy.
Don't let us fade awaaa-yy
When the time comes and we can be with each other,
Don't let this be out blunder
The love in our heart will groo-ww
The time for us is noo-ww
The strings will play,
Yet never fade away.
Play this song, to know you belong.
To hear the strings of our hearts."
Satisfied, I leaned back in the bed and re-read my work. I picked up a pen and wrote my way outtttttt lol For the first time, I smiled. In the darkest of times, I had managed to harness the energy that fueled me onstage. I had managed to accomplish what I thought would be impossible.
With a fresh mindset, I shifted in my seat, and located my phone. It was at three percent battery, but that would be enough to do the job. I had twenty eight missed calls from Katniss Everdeen and twenty nine from Primrose Everdeen. I pushed the guilt that squirmed in my stomach away and texted Finnick something he'd probably never believe. But I had faith that this would happen. I didn't know what I would do if it didn't.
And sure enough, fifteen minutes later, Finnick, followed by a surprised-looking nurse bounced into my room, grinning with a guitar case wrapped around his back. "Peeta!" he cried, rushing over to my bed. "Oh man, dude, it is so good to see you. Ah! I missed you so much."
"I missed you too. All of you," I said, grinning right back. We both laughed, even though there was nothing funny about the situation.
"Are you sure he's ready to leave?" the nurse asked doubtfully. "It's only been a week."
"Exactly!" Finnick said cheerfully. "An entire week. Plus he got a fancy new leg. All the ladies these days love shiny, metallic legs."
"Yeah, well, Katniss won't care." I said confidently. "But anyway, we should get going. We have a concert to hold." The moment those words escaped my mouth, I felt even more invigorated. I was coming back.
"All right," the nurse replied, still doubtful. "Well, be careful. I don't think you'll be walking any time soon. Remain in the wheelchair until your therapy starts, okay? Overexerting yourself will only cause more complications."
"Yes ma'am," Finnick said. "I will make sure he is glued to that rolling chair of his."
I laughed, and the nurse shook her head exasperatedly. "I still can't believe that you two are world-famous musicians."
"Me neither!" Finnick said loudly as we left the room. Feeling happier and lighter than I had in months, I waved good-bye to every assistant and nurse in the whole place. And when we finally crawled in Finnick's car, it didn't even bother me that my seat was soaked with spilled Sprite.
As Finnick started driving, he shot me a sideways glance. "Are you one hundred percent sure that you want to do this? Paparazzi will be everywhere. And the last time we heard from Gale... well, you know what happened."
I sighed. "I know, I know. And..." I paused, staring out the window, afraid of Finnick's reaction to what I was going to say next. "This will be my last show. At least for now."
To my uttermost surprise, Finnick nodded. "I've been thinking that too. I loved being a super-star, but I'm done with that kind of life. I'm done staying up till six in the morning, taking pills to keep me from falling asleep midday, parties, and crowds. I think... I think I want to be done."
I gaped at him, totally thrown off-guard. I never would have believed that Finnick would let me do that, let alone agree with me. But I swallowed my shock and nodded. "We are wise men," I told him, patting him on the back. "Thanks for taking it well."
"Indeed we are. The wisest of men. And don't thank me just yet. Gale will probably lose his shit," Finnick reminded me.
"Well, didn't he sort of dump us about a month ago anyway?" I asked, grinning.
"Ah. You have a point. Well then, I suppose he'll be pleased."
"He finally got rid of us," I said in a mockingly remorseful voice.
"Took him long enough."
We both laughed. God, I had missed this, I thought happily.
"Is that it?" Finnick asked, peering out the window. We were in the parking lot of a grand hotel, complete with a huge pool, mini forest, and stage.
"Looks like something Gale would stay in, so yeah, probably."
Finnick laughed and said, "Alrighty then. Let's head in. Do you need help getting out of the car or should I just stand here and watch you struggle?"
"Uh, help please."
After a bit of tugging and not so graceful landing on my part, I was in the wheelchair, clutching my hospital report with the lyrics hastily scribbled on to it. We crossed the parking lot, and Finnick's paparazzi prediction was correct. Tens of them swarmed Finnick and I as we pushed and shoved our way through the crowd and into the lobby. Cameras flashed and interviewers desperately tried to get our replies to complicated questions, but Finnick and I paid them no mind. At last, after a good five minutes of shoving people out of the way, we reached the lobby. Sure enough, Gale stood right in front of us, clearly waiting for our arrival.
"You got the message," I said, rather awkwardly.
"Oh yeah. Let's head upstairs. I have a suite on the sixth floor." We followed him down the hall and into the elevator, ignoring the flashing cameras and waving fans. The elevator ride was silent and tense, but once we got into Gale's room, he flashed his signature seductive smile at us.
"It's been a while, boys," he said.
"Indeed it has," Finnick agreed.
"So, you two want to put on a concert, I hear. And... why do you need me?" he asked. There was a tone of bitterness in his voice. I looked at the floor, guilty. I had not anticipated that there would be much tension between us. But then I realized that Finnick and I had disappeared for three months without really letting him know.
"Well, because you're part of New Capital," I said. "We're gonna do this together."
"You didn't seem to think that these past four months," Gale snapped. Finnick winced.
"Three months, actually."
"Three months, four months, what's the difference?" Gale demanded. "The point is, you two left me for a long-ass time, and then you come back months later, begging me to be part of a show with you! Peeta has a leg missing, Finnick looks like he hasn't slept in weeks, and you just expect me to roll with it?"
My heart sank, but I had a feeling that this might happen.
"No."
"What?"
"No," I repeated. "I didn't expect you to roll with it or like the plan. But it was worth a shot in the long run. I just wanted you to be there for me and Finnick's last shows."
"Your what?"
"Last shows," Finnick said again. "Gale, that life of being a world-famous star was fun. It was exciting and new, but it was draining. We never got a break. And Peeta and I, well, we finally got one. We finally got a break. And we realized how amazing a normal life could be. How we could be ourselves and not worry about how what we said might make the top headlines tomorrow. How we could live and love normally. It was refreshing."
Gale looked down. For a moment, it was silent. Then-
"And you didn't think to include me?" he asked quietly.
"What?" I asked, sure that I had misheard.
"You didn't think to ask me about it? You didn't even bother to let your best friend, your brother know that you were taking a break? Or maybe you did and just didn't want me involved," he said angrily.
"No, no, Gale, that's not it," I said desperately. "You were on tour, and we didn't want to stop you from doing what you love. Finnick and I thought that you still really liked your limelight life. We thought that you would hate living a normal life. That's why we left. Not out of anger. Just because we thought you wouldn't want to."
Gale's expression softed. "Well, next time, you let me know before you leave!"
Finnick and I quickly swore that we would, and slowly a smile crept back onto Gale's face. "I suppose it won't really matter with you two leaving. I was always the favorite amongst the fans anyway," he boasted jokingly.
"Hey!" Finnick said, elbowing him. "Not true. I definitely had the most fans. It's just part of my divine charm."
We all laughed, relishing these moments of happiness and togetherness, knowing that they were limited.
"So, Peeta, tell me about this plan of yours," Gale said, collapsing onto a couch.
And so I did.
~New Years Eve~
"Are you sure you're ready for this?" Gale whispered into my ear. "You're still in a wheelchair."
"Yeah, I know that," I hissed. "I'm fine."
We were backstage on the hotel stage, hiding from the thousands of fans that had showed up for our final show together as a trio. We had decided that even though Finnick and I would be done, Gale would continue to lead New Capital as a one-man show, just as he had promised all those weeks before. Although there had been thousands of news reports and headlines on our tough decision, the fan feedback seemed to be mostly positive. And that made it all the more better.
Finnick came dashing in next to us, smoothing his hair down.
"Did you see them?" I asked.
"Nope. Katniss, Annie, and Prim are not here. But they could show up... eventually. Maybe they're just really late."
"Yeah. Maybe," I echoed. There was no use denying it: I was disappointed. I had something quite special planned at the end of the concert, but without Katniss, the plan was useless. But I kept the ring in my back pocket, just in case.
"Trio! In on three!" a stage manager hissed at us from the shadows. I took a deep breath.
"1... 2... 3... GO!"
Gale ran out onto the stage first, grinning and waving. Finnick and I followed him, Finnick pushing me in the chair, smiling good-naturedly.
The announcer said in his booming, echoey voice, "Ladies and gentlemen! Please welcome the talented Neeeewww CAAPITAAAAL!!"
This was met with screams and claps from the crowd, who were all cheering very loudly. I blinked, ears ringing. I had forgotten how loud putting on a concert was.
"Aaaand nowww, GALE HAWTHORNE!" the announcer shouted.
Gale grinned and said loudly but clearly, "Welcome, everyone!" Before he could finish, the audience's deafening cheers cut him out. He smiled and waved his hands at them to settle down. "Now, as you all know, this is our final show, just the three of us." A hush fell on the audience. They all knew this of course, but to hear it directly from the subject itself if different. "But! Of course we will still remain good friends. And, as you know, I will continue to lead the band, solo, though. So as a special treat, we wanted to sing a few of our favorite songs and conclude with a new solo written by Peeta alone!" The audience screamed back its approval and Gale stepped back. A small beep from my earpiece confirmed that our microphones were on and ready to do.
And so, with me sitting in the wheelchair in the middle, the three of us did what we did best.
We sang our hearts out.
We sang a total of ten songs, and the entire time, I was scanning the audience for a particular someone that I didn't think I'd find. I was looking for a familiar pair of eagle-gray eyes with long lashes. I was searching for long, shiny dark brown hair. It was the second-to-last song, and I still couldn't see her- but wait!
All this time I had been looking toward the back of the stage without realizing that Katniss, Prim, and Annie were in the front row. My heart almost stopped when I saw Katniss: fierce, determined, and loving, staring back at me. I love you, she mouthed.
Those three words propelled me forward, and I finished our song with an echoing high note. The audience erupted into applause and cheers. Finnick and Gale, both drenched in sweat, looked at me and grinned. I winked at both of them and rolled my chair forward an inch. Even though I was out of breath, I said, "This final song is one that I started months ago and finished during one of the hardest times in my life." I paused. The audience fell silent again. "But this song also got me up out of bed after losing a leg and gave me the energy and motivation to continue. Katniss..." I paused again, for dramatic affect. "This one is for you."
And just like I had so many times before, I sang.
"I used to believe in love;
One day it was all taken away.
It's hard to keep going at first;
But romance isn't a game.
I thought it was all a lie,
until I looked into your beautiful eyes.
They concealed all my fears;
I forgot about my tears,
And I knew you were the one for me.
You control the strings to my heart.
You are what keeps me going.
It wasn't until then that I thought it wasn't true.
But you hold the strings to my heart.
Then that day came and I wanted to stay,
Yet my heartache still came.
But you took it away.
You took it all away.
So just hold me close,
Never let me go and carry me away.
We'll wash it all away with this song,
And make it in this world.
To have and to hold, is all I need.
To never leave your side,
to stay with your soul and never part.
Our souls could part...but I'd follow you all the waaa-yy.
Don't let us fade awaaa-yy
When the time comes and we can be with each other,
Don't let this be out blunder
The love in our heart will groo-ww
The time for us is noo-ww
The strings will play,
Yet never fade away.
Play this song, to know you belong.
To hear the strings of our hearts."
The audience was screaming, and most were sobbing, but I wasn't done yet. I looked down at Katniss, just a few feet away and said softly, "Katniss, will you come up here?" Tears were already streaming down her face and I knew mine would look similar in a matter of seconds. She climbed up the stairs and knelt down next to my wheelchair, clutching my hand with her own shaky ones. Her entire face was filled with love and for a moment I couldn't speak because I was so filled with love.
"Katniss," I began in a choked voice. "You are the most amazing person I've ever met. You're strong, beautiful, fierce, loyal, and your presence alone can cheer me up instantly. Thinking of you was the only was I was able to stay sane during those weeks at the hospital. I know we've been through so much together, but I wouldn't want it any other way. I love you so much and I always will. Katniss, I want to spend the rest of my life with you."
I snuck a glance at her. Katniss's eyes were wide with shock, and tears trickled down her cheeks, but I had never seen her look so full of joy.
"Katniss, will you marry me?"
The audience waited with baited breath. I looked her, the love of my life, straight in the eye, and pulled out a beautiful yet simple diamond ring.
"Yes," she whispered.
The audience screamed bloody murder, and Finnick and Gale roared and clapped withthe rest of them, but I only heard and saw Katniss. "I love you," she whispered through her tears. "I love you so much and I'll never stop."
And even though I knew that I would probably fall, would probably hurt myself, I pushed my wheelchair aside and stood up. I pressed my lips against hers and together we collapsed to the ground, melting into one.
And I wouldn't want it any other way.