The stiletto cacophony of my aching heartbeat resounded in my eardrums, the chest cavity where my life giving organ resided expanding exponentially to accommodate for the ever growing speed at which it pounded incessantly.
A soft crackle filled my ears, then, a welcome distraction from the sheer panic invading my senses.
"We're in place, Lydia. Just take your time, and remember that he can't hurt you before we get to you. We're just playing a waiting game now, so take a deep breath. You need to get out of your car now, he should be coming soon."
Detective Ryan's voice filled me with a particular sense of both dread and hope, if hope even was the right word for the emotions infiltrating my body at that very moment.
One second passed, then two, then three. It was as if my body knew what to do of its own accord, as my shaking legs swung to the left and my sweating, numbed hands clasped the handle of my car's door.
I took one parting breath, one last look at the escape that I should have used before going on this suicide mission. But if I knew it was a death trap, then why did I agree to this in the first place? Because I knew they'd catch him, but not before hurting me, or worse.
But it would be worth it. If he never hurt another person again, especially someone that I loved, my demise would be worth his downfall.
But would it be worth the carnage that I left behind in my wake? I wasn't daft to think that this wouldn't hurt Emmett, might even wreck him...but he would heal. So long as he was alive to give himself time to regenerate the hole in my heart my death might cause.
Blinking back the salty tears that clouded my already distorted vision, my feet hit the black asphalt and then a calmness draped over me, like an eerie windless day before the inevitable tornado that would come to bring disaster and ruin.
The building to my left was crumbling and dilapidated, its walls browning and dull where it had once been a brilliant white. The one to my right wasn't much better despite being a younger age.
Shaking, steadying breaths plagued my lungs as cigarette smoke tinted air filled me and I was almost instantly transported to the night where Raphael hurt Amalia, to the day outside the courthouse for Christian's first trial, to the nights where Nate would belittle and demean me in front of his friends at the bars...
And now it would forever be associated with this day, this dark and dreary mid afternoon day, overcast and bristling with stark cold that sank deep into my bones as if it were on a mission to scald me to the quick simply by searing me upon impact with the weather.
I wrapped my trembling arms around my midsection and forced my legs to take one step, two, three...
And so on and so forth until finally I was positioned in the middle of a dark and dank alleyway, the dripping of old rainwater splattering into a puddle and I could have sworn that I heard the telltale signs of a feral cat hissing and screaming in the distance, the sentiment echoed in any horror or action movie in which the audience would scream at the dull and unintelligent main character to run as fast as her legs could take her. But my feet stayed glued to the cracked pavement beneath my feet, the bullet proof vest almost weighing me down on the spot.
Footsteps echoed through the hollowed out alleyway, the sun choosing that time to be almost completely blocked out by charcoal, swirling clouds.
It seemed like a millennia before a figure finally appeared in the distance, his body shrouded in shadows and black.
"You really came. I was almost a hundred percent sure you were trying to trick me, or were working with the cops. But you actually came, alone."
HIs voice was like nails on a chalkboard for all intents and purposes for as soon as the first word was out of his mouth, chills erupted across my spine.
His form was taller than I'd remembered, and flashbacks from that night in his room flitted across my waking consciousness. I remembered everything- the begging and pleading him to stop...
"I came because you won't leave the people I care about alone. I came to tell you to leave me and them alone, or what happens next won't be pretty."
How my voice came out strong and without shaking with vibrato in each syllable was lost on me as a small bark of laughter escaped him, sending a sharp shudder through my body.
"Is that right?"
He took a step closer, then a few more, until finally those shadows no longer kept him from my eyesight.
His eyes were sunken in and hollow, his hair scraggly and his face growing a thick blanket of hair which made him almost look like a completely different person. Almost. I'd never forget that detached look in his eyes, like he was half of a human and half of a monster.
"Yes. You took enough from me, and I won't allow you to do any more damage. Because of you, I was damaged. I allowed more predators into my life, because they saw me as easy prey, because of you!"
"I took enough from you?! I would have given you the best night of your life all those years ago if we weren't interrupted. And then everything was fine, even the trial was going to go my way, but Mia's brother was too close to it. He knew his sister was going to testify against me, so when I came up here for a visit to see my favorite girl, he cornered me. What else was I supposed to do?"
His favorite girl? He surely couldn't have been talking about me?
"Yes, Lydia. You're my favorite. The only one who didn't try to fight me in court...until here recently with the murder accusations. All true by the way, but it still hurts that you thought so low of me to immediately assume the worst."
He was outright deluded, that much I was certain. He stalked closer towards me and my heart thundered in my chest. Sweat beaded up on my forehead as it skipped a few beats, and I swayed on my feet.
No, not here, not now. My heart had been managed recently with my medicine, but my doctor had said to keep stress to a minimum.
Facing my abuser and a murderer definitely wasn't following those doctor's orders.
"What's wrong, are you sick? I saw you in the hospital, with that football player. He's in the way, his friend almost took care of him for me but before I could finish him off the cops showed up. It's fine, I'll just take you away from here and we can forget about him, forget about the rest of the world."
I tried desperately to blink back the stars but I couldn't see straight. I began panicking as he kept coming closer. I backed up a bit as the static sounded behind my ears. Where were the cops?!
"Stop, don't come any closer," I said, my breath coming out in wheezes as I clutched at my chest, the tears falling freely down my cheeks as the terror took over me completely, fight or flight kicking in finally.
I stood my ground as his dark figure kept coming closer.
Christian, my attacker, a murderer, was circling me like I was his prey. Because he was the predator, always was and always would be.
We'd never be safe. He'd already escaped police custody twice and was doing fine evading them, especially considering they'd needed my help to even get close, to be the bait.
"What's wrong, you're hurt?"
I was wheezing in breaths, trying to get in enough air to survive but the black dots invading my vision kept me from seeing just how close he was, and I would not survive if he got too close.
And then his arm was around my back, as if attached to a ghost body since I could have sworn he had just been three feet away, not directly beside me.
I flinched back and out of his hold that seemed to burn me and I wanted to turn and retch on the pavement under me but my body didn't comply, as the nausea kept rolling through me over and over again with no release.
And then the boots on the ground sounded from all around.
"FREEZE! HANDS IN THE AIR!"
"You betrayed me? How could you Lydia? After everything we've been through?!"
I couldn't see him, couldn't think, could barely breathe, hunched over in a corner whilst sobbing into my hands, reduced to a weakling as my useless heart stuttered and broke in my chest.
"He was tackled to the ground but fought and struggled with the cop, his hands in his pocket.
"He's got a gun!"
I hadn't realized the words had come from me as the glint of dark metal shone as finally the sun peaked through the hazy clouds.
It was like my prayers had been answered, the sun giving way to the dark and bleak night that shrouded everything, but then a shot went off, and it wasn't from the officer.
The uniformed body rolled off of Christian's body as he stood and pointed it directly at the next one, Detective Ryan.
"NO!"
It sounded cliche, but everything afterwards truly did happen in slow motion. Looking back, I could recall every minuscule detail, right down to the way that the first officer's blood pooled around an old cigarette butt, the crimson liquid painting the old white and brown nicotine stick tainting it with a life force that it sucked from its users.
I was off to the side, a direct line to Christian, but Detective Ryan was in front of him, rushing at him with a SWAT shield in front of her, her long legs locked in a dead sprint towards my abuser.
Murderer. Two times over...
I didn't think as I launched my body at Christian, surprising him as his gun was pointed straight ahead, not to the side where I had come from.
It was almost like I was simply a nuisance to him, considering that I was of feeble strength, but the force from my impact knocked him back just enough for him to stumble and then Detective Ryan was there, slamming into him much harder than I had, his gun skittering to the side of the alleyway as the deadly metal machine was rendered useless without a fatal, killing machine at its helm.
The walkie talkies started going crazy, countless voices filtering through that damned static and I fought the urge to tear the piece out of my ear.
Citizens poured through the alleyway to inspect the cause of the gunshot and police tape was quickly wrapped around the site, attempting to keep the non personnel from entering.
"Lydia?"
Her voice was muffled, my ears ringing with the sharp clamor of the gunshot as the person it had killed lay lifeless and limp on the ground in a puddle of his own blood.
"You did good Lydia. There's someone-"
"Lydia!"
My head finally registered the sound of my name as it came from someone other than an officer or detective.
My eyes met his as he limped towards the scene, his face stricken with grief as he took in the sight before him.
His girlfriend huddled on the ground around a dead police officer, a writhing murderer fighting in handcuffs off to the side, a gun being picked up by forensic workers with gloves and a plastic baggy.
He was dressed normally, not in the hospital gown he'd been in earlier in the morning. I smiled, drained of all my energy.
He tried to duck under the tape but was stopped by a uniformed worker trying to keep the peace but as everyone noticed Emmett's appearance the clamoring from the crowd grew further.
My head swam, the flash of cameras fogging my already haunted vision.
As I swayed again on my feet, Emmett cursed and ran under the tape just in time to catch me in his arms, Christian being carried away in a police cruiser.
Finally safe, I closed my arms against the man I loved and allowed his warmth to consume me while my heartbeat returned back, one, two, three beats...content. Safe.
Free.