Author's Note: I have about 14 stories on my to-do list right now, including a multi-part story, so...yeah. I'm not going to have a life for a while. But that's fine. Levi is worth it. :)
It had been a particularly disgusting morning, and clumps of mud still littered the streets. At least it had stopped raining in time for you to accompany Captain Levi on some errands. The sun shone brightly as you walked through town a half step behind your superior.
Since you were technically on duty, both you and your captain were still in your Scout uniforms. The wings on your back always elicited an array of reactions from people, ranging from pure admiration to utter disdain. You had gotten used to it by now, and you instinctively ignored the townspeople's staring as you passed.
The two of you were walking across a bridge when you were met with a rather unpleasant sight.
"Well, if it isn't the Scouts," one of the MP's sneered hatefully.
"Walking wastes of taxpayer money," his partner added.
You glared at the men, but you refrained from doing anything more after Levi hissed at you to ignore them. However, that task became impossible when they stepped right into your path.
"Excuse us," you bit out, trying to control your temper.
The MP's didn't move. "Hasn't your joke of a regiment been disbanded yet?" the first one asked.
"You're in the way," Levi muttered, sounding almost bored. "Move."
"And who are you, short stack?" the MP asked.
You almost couldn't believe what you were hearing. How dare they? "You are addressing Captain Levi," you snapped. "You ought to show some respect."
The MP's scoffed. The one who had just spoken replied, "Why should I show respect to people who aren't worth the dirt beneath our feet?"
For emphasis, he kicked the clump of mud beneath him. You watched, aghast, as that mud flew through the air, as if in slow motion, and splattered all over Levi's boots.
That was the last straw. It would have been considered extremely disrespectful to kick mud on any officer, but given what you knew about Levi's obsession with cleanliness, the action made you all the angrier.
Without giving anyone time to react, you bent down, grabbed the man's legs, and tipped him over the rail, into the river below. There were a few gasps from the townspeople nearby as you, Levi, and the other MP all peered down into the water.
Fortunately – or perhaps, unfortunately – the MP could swim, and he was now yelling at you and shaking his fist while he kicked to stay afloat.
You couldn't help laughing a little under your breath. The scene was quite comical, and the MP had certainly deserved it. Actually, he deserved a lot worse, in your opinion.
"(L/n)," Levi growled, yanking you around to face him. "What were you thinking?"
Immediately, your mood became serious. As you stared into your captain's eyes, that forbidden emotion that you had been feeling recently once again rose to the surface. "He got mud on you," you replied softly.
You weren't sure, but you could've sworn that something in Levi's expression changed a little. His eyes weren't as cold as they had been a moment ago. "We're leaving," he stated.
He then turned sharply away, forcing you to rush after him.
------------------------------------------
Later that evening, you were sitting outside with the rest of your squadmates. Levi had gone somewhere with Commander Erwin, so you were all taking the opportunity to rest before he returned and inevitably made you clean the entire castle...again.
"By the way, (f/n), did you really toss an MP into the river?" Oluo asked with a conspirator's grin.
"Who told you that?" you muttered, glancing at him suspiciously.
"Oh, everyone's talking about it," he replied. "So, what did he do to incur your wrath?"
Oluo wasn't the only one interested in your response. Your other three squadmates had stopped what they were doing to listen as well. You looked at each of them in turn, wondering what you should say.
You didn't want to admit that you had done it for Levi, because you didn't want to imply that he needed you to defend him. He definitely didn't. However, you had done it anyway, because you cared about him – and that was something else you couldn't admit.
In the end, you stated nonchalantly, "He was playing in the mud, so I thought he needed a bath."
"Is that all?" Oluo scoffed. "Come now, (f/n) dear. You can't expect us to believe –"
"Hey guys," Eld interrupted, suddenly looking very serious. "We've got company. Check it out."
You all turned in the direction that Eld indicated, only to see three MP's walking toward you. Your apprehension grew when you realized that two of them were the men from the bridge. The third appeared to be a high-ranking officer.
"Can we help you with something?" Eld asked when they stopped at your table.
To your dismay, the leader looked directly at you. "(F/n) (l/n)?"
Your expression remained impassive as you replied, "Yes."
"You need to come with us," he stated.
Eld rose to his feet. "Wait just a minute. What is this about?" he asked.
"Earlier this afternoon, (l/n) assaulted a Military Police officer by throwing him into the river. So she's being court-martialed."
Uh-oh.
You expected the MP's to hold a grudge, but you didn't think they would take it this far. If you were sent to court and found guilty, not only could you be kicked out of the military, but you could also be thrown into prison. And you were definitely going to be found guilty.
"Let's think about that for a moment, shall we?" you said with a placating smile as you stood to your feet, taking a discreet step back. "You want to haul a little girl like me into court and admit that I was able to throw one of your elite soldiers into the river? You want to say that in front of the premier and the entire military?"
The man paled.
You shrugged, then held out your wrists. "Well, if you insist..."
"I...well..." he stammered, trying to maintain his composure while he searched for something to say. "On second thought, we don't have to take this to court. Just...don't do it again!" he finished sternly.
You put on your most innocent expression. "Whatever you say, sir."
The one you had thrown in the river looked flabbergasted at his superior's statement. However, he wasn't in a position to argue. Instead, he glared daggers at you while the three of them walked away.
You and your squadmates didn't move or speak until the MP's were out of sight. Then Gunther broke the silence with an amused chuckle. "Did you seriously just wiggle your way out of getting arrested, (f/n)?"
"Is that what I did?" you mumbled as you sat back down, still reeling from the incident but trying not to show it.
"Don't play coy, (f/n) dear. We all saw what happened," Oluo said in a superior voice. "Of course, I never would have let them take you, anyway –"
"Oh, give it a rest!" Petra snapped. "Don't you get how serious this is? (F/n) was almost arrested!"
"Fair point," Eld added. Then he turned to you. "I'd keep a low profile for a bit. You don't want to give them another excuse to arrest you. After all, if you go to jail, that's not just on you. It reflects poorly on Captain Levi and the Scout Regiment."
His words made you feel sick. You never wanted to embarrass Levi – you were just trying to defend him. However, it seemed that was a fine line to walk. "I'll be careful," you mumbled, hanging your head low.
Eld noticed your dismay. "Hey, now," he began gently, "it's not like I don't sympathize –"
"(L/n)!"
Your head whipped around at that cold, familiar voice. Levi only used your last name when you were in trouble. And he did not sound happy at all.
"My office!" he barked from where he stood at the entrance to the building, next to a severe-looking Commander Erwin. "Now!"
You winced. Your squadmates gave you sympathetic glances as you rose from your seat and made your way to your captain.
When you reached him, Levi turned to go, but the commander stopped him. "Just a moment, Levi. I'd like to discuss something with you."
Levi flicked his steely eyes to you. "Go," he growled.
You nodded timidly, then shuffled off in the direction of his office. You weren't scared of Levi himself, knowing that he would never hurt you. However, you were scared of how angry he sounded. In the years that you had been in his squad, he had never spoken to you with such sharpness.
You silently opened and shut the door, then made your way to the chair in front of his desk. However, you stopped halfway when you noticed something in the corner.
His boots.
He must not have had time to clean them before going off with Commander Erwin, and instead changed into a different pair. He was probably intending to clean these ones when he returned.
Without really thinking about it, you went to the cabinet where Levi kept his cleaning supplies, pulling out a rag and a bin. Then you knelt in the corner and began scraping the mud off of his boots.
A few minutes later, Levi stormed into his office. "Do you have any idea –" he began angrily. However, he abruptly stopped talking when his gaze landed on you. His eyes widened almost imperceptibly.
You were still hunched in the corner, meticulously cleaning his boots. Normally, you would have been expected to stand and salute a superior officer. However, when your eyes locked with his, you found yourself unable to move, or even breathe.
"What are you doing?" he asked, his voice barely audible.
"I'm...cleaning your boots, Captain," you whispered.
His eyes remained locked on you. "I see."
An uncertain silence stretched between you. For a long moment, neither of you moved or spoke.
"Um...sir...may I continue?" you murmured, afraid of breaking the silence, but also unable to let it go on.
Your question seemed to snap Levi out of his trance. He quickly tore his gaze from yours and muttered, "Yes. Continue." Then he walked to his desk and slid into his chair.
Now that Levi was no longer looking at you, you were able to return your attention to his boots. However, as you faced away from him and scrubbed the leather, you agonized over what he might be thinking. Although he had clearly been surprised to find you like this, his expression hadn't betrayed anything else.
After several minutes, you stood up and tossed the rag into the bin. "I'm finished, Captain," you murmured, keeping your eyes on the ground because you were too nervous to look at him.
"Good," he stated. "Take a seat."
You meekly did as he ordered. However, you were confused when Levi stayed where he was. "Aren't you going to check my work?" you asked.
"No. I'm sure you cleaned them properly."
Your breath caught. Levi was incredibly particular about cleanliness, so for him to trust you like this...it was huge. And you were completely stunned.
"(F/n)..." he began softly, "...about what you did today..."
You bit your lip, unsure of what would come next. Levi didn't sound angry anymore, so you supposed that was good.
He sighed. "Erwin and I passed those MP's on their way out of Headquarters. They told us that they had originally come to arrest you, but they changed their minds." He shook his head. "Do you have any idea how bad this could have been for you?"
"I do, sir," you replied quietly. "And I'm sorry. I didn't mean to cause trouble for you. I just –" You stopped abruptly, tensing up as you realized what you had been about to say. Under no circumstances could you tell Levi that you loved him.
"You didn't cause trouble for me, brat," he muttered. "I...I get why you did it."
"You do?" you gasped, your head snapping up to look at him in shock. Had he found out about your feelings for him? Impossible. You had been so careful to hide them. But still...
"Yes," Levi stated, glancing off to the side as if he couldn't look at you. "I mean...I am your captain..." he mumbled.
Your heart gave a funny beat, sort of like it had been let down. But why were you feeling this way? You should be happy that Levi thought your devotion to him was nothing more than a subordinate's loyalty. Yet, all you felt was sadness.
"Yes, sir," you muttered as your eyes fell to the ground. "I did it because you're my captain."
Levi cleared his throat, trying to get over the awkwardness. Although he appreciated your loyalty, he didn't particularly feel comfortable discussing it. He looked back at you and said, "Well, I personally don't care that you threw that pig in the river. If you ask me, he deserved it. But I do want you to stay out of trouble, even if it's on my account. You're a good soldier, (f/n). I'd hate to lose you."
His last sentence carried a weight to it – a sadness, almost. However, you were too wrapped up in your own melancholy to notice. "Yes, sir," you repeated.
Levi's brow furrowed. "You don't have to sound so depressed, brat. You're not being punished."
You swallowed before quickly looking up at him and forcing yourself to smile. "I'm fine, Captain."
Levi gave a thoughtful hum low in his throat, as if he didn't quite believe you. "Whatever. You're dismissed."
You got up to leave, feeling like a knife had been stuck in your chest. You had thought that you didn't want Levi to know about your love for him. In a way, that was still the case, since he would certainly end up rejecting you if you told him. However, a growing part of you was itching to tell him, wanting him to know how much he meant to you, and hoping against all odds that maybe – just maybe – you meant as much to him.
Just as your fingers touched the doorknob, Levi called out, "Wait."
You whipped your head around to look at him, and he stood from his chair, his brow furrowed in concentration as he made his way over to you. He stopped right in front of you, then reached up and took your chin in his hand.
Suddenly, you couldn't breathe.
Levi tilted your head slightly to the left, then muttered, "You've got dirt on your face. Sit on the couch. I'll clean it off for you."
You stared at him, completely stunned. First, he had touched you, and now, he was offering to wash your face? Your heart was pounding so intensely that you couldn't think straight.
Somehow, you managed to do as he asked. You perched in the middle of the couch while Levi went to his washroom, then came back with a damp cloth. He sat next to you and once again took your chin in his hand, tilting your head to get a clear view of your jawbone. The dirt must have been hidden from his sight until you turned to leave, and he saw your face at just the right angle. Even so, he could've simply alerted you to its presence without cleaning it off himself.
You didn't expect him to be so gentle when he applied the warm cloth to your skin. As he rubbed the mud away, he murmured, "By the way, thank you...for cleaning my boots."
He sounded so sincere, like he genuinely did appreciate you. Upon hearing those soft words, you were hit with the full force of exactly how much you loved him. And it was too much for you to take.
Tears pricked your eyes. You hastily tried to blink them away as you whispered, "I was happy to do it, Captain."
And you were. You would do anything for Levi, no matter the cost. You would drag yourself through the mud if it meant that he could be clean. You would sacrifice your life if it meant that he could be safe and happy.
You wished you could tell him how you felt. You wished he would feel the same way. And you wished, desperately, overwhelmingly, that the two of you could live a long and happy life together.
But those wishes would never come true. So you sat quietly on his couch, trying not to cry as he wiped all the impurities from your skin. Unfortunately, it seemed impossible to hide anything from Levi.
He stilled when he saw the water in your (e/c) orbs. "Are you crying?" he asked with widening eyes.
You quickly pulled out of his grip and turned your face away so that he wouldn't see. "N-no, sir. It's n-nothing," you stammered.
Levi sighed. "Tch. Drop the formalities, brat. Call me 'Levi'," he muttered.
You swallowed the lump in your throat, then whispered, "Okay...Levi."
It was the name you loved above all others, and it felt beautiful on your lips.
"And don't say that it's nothing," he continued. "Something is obviously bothering you, so just tell me what it is."
You bit your lip, but remained silent.
"Is this about the MP's?" Levi pressed.
You shook your head.
"Did someone hurt you?"
Again, you shook your head.
"Then what?" Levi insisted.
You squeezed your eyes shut, but even so, you were unable to stop the tears from flowing any longer.
"Tch," Levi hissed. "Don't do that."
Far gentler than you would have expected, you felt his calloused palm cup your cheek. He turned you to face him, and when your misty eyes met his, pain crossed his features. He then raised a hand to cup your other cheek, and his thumbs carefully wiped the tears from your skin.
"What's wrong, (f/n)?" he asked softly.
You felt the lump return to your throat. "I can't tell you."
"Why not?"
You shut your eyes again, trying to block out the pain. "You'll hate me. You'll send me away."
"(F/n), nothing on this earth could ever make me hate you."
"But –"
You were cut off by a pair of soft, slightly chapped lips pressing gently against your own. Your mind was too shocked to process what was happening, but your body instinctively relaxed, savoring the kiss that was all you could have ever wanted. Then Levi pulled back, and your eyes opened to meet his.
"W-why?" you asked breathlessly.
His thumbs stroked your face again – this time, almost reverently. "I'm in love with you, brat," he admitted shyly, a light blush tinging his cheeks. "I'll never hate you, or send you away. So will you please tell me what's wrong?"
"I...um..." you stammered, finding it difficult to process. Levi...loved you.
At last, the truth sank in, and you smiled, even through your tears. "I actually was afraid that you would never love me, because...I love you, too. A lot."
He blinked in surprise, then asked breathlessly, "Shit, is that really the reason?"
You nodded.
"Tch. You're an idiot," he grumbled, though his voice was soft despite his words. "How could I not love you? You're beautiful, and tough, and clever enough to talk your way out of getting arrested." A small smirk touched his lips. "Plus, I really enjoyed watching you throw that MP in the river."
You giggled, feeling butterflies in your stomach because of his compliments. "I guess it's just...you never really seemed interested in...romance," you explained.
Levi hummed thoughtfully. "I suppose that's fair. But you know how I feel now, right?"
"I do," you murmured.
"Good."
His fingers continued to stroke your cheeks, even though your tears were now gone. The gesture made you feel so loved and cherished, and you couldn't help smiling at the man who held you with such care. His eyes softened at the sight, and then, unbelievably, he gave you a small smile in return.
It was the first time you had ever seen him do that.
"Now that we've cleared that up," he muttered, "can I finish cleaning your face?"
You nodded, and one of Levi's hands left you for a second as he picked up the washcloth. He continued his gentle ministrations, and you suddenly realized that this was a way in which Levi showed affection. Your heart warmed.
After he was done, he gave you a thorough once-over to make sure there wasn't dirt anywhere else. His eyes locked with yours as he murmured, "Perfect." And before you even had a chance to blush, he leaned in for another soft, loving kiss.