Chapter 36:
"Okay we've been at this for hours." Alice had finally made her grand entrance to the table three hours ago. "At this point I do too."
"Hey, we want to put an end to this just as much as you." Julius sighed, braiding his hands together. "We can't mess this up."
"We won't." Nicholai made that clear. "It's already settled." He had taken off his jacket in the middle of us trying to discuss business.
"Which was stupid." Nobody was going to give it to him straight and uncut but I was. All heads turned to me and he raised both eyebrows at my bluntness, well get use to it. "You can't threaten someone of that magnitude and think you're going to be left alone after you exchange vows."
"I gave it some thought." His posture remained unbothered. "And I made the next move."
"Something tells me you're not telling us what all you know." My left eye twitched from the stress, my gut feeling was telling me that he knew how this was going to play out, and all of this planning and trying to make sure it'll be a smooth sail would be pointless.
"Have I given you a reason to doubt me?" My mind played back to all of the encounters we've had and how he had handled them, and so far no he hasn't, but the way he wouldn't simply just engage himself grew to be bothersome. "You're overthinking this." He paused my thoughts from running wild.
"Anyone would if we want to come out of this alive, I'm not overthinking, I'm analyzing all of the options and if you know something you need to tell everyone that has their life on the line for you and that's all the people in this room Nicholai."
His face creased in like I had hit the nail right on the head and his jaw locked in place before he once again relaxed, not giving away too much but I had caught him in his act.
"Is she right?" Crixus tiredly asked. He threw down the floor plan, of where the wedding would take place, to get the answers we all had questions to.
"Don't question me Crixus." Nicholai didn't take his tone lightly.
"Don't question you?" Crixus timing was spot on in this moment. Lorenzo placed his hand on his shoulder but he shrugged it off and Lorenzo sat back with his hands raised, staying out of this one. "Is she right Nicholai?"
He didn't utter a single word; his stare was blank.
Crixus slammed his hands on the table, almost shattering the glass before he tried to get to Nicholai but he couldn't as both of his brothers were to their feet the second he tried. "We lost Emil because of this and you've been planning something behind our back?"
"Crixus." Julius warned him but he didn't stop.
"We deserve to know!" He shoved his brothers hand off his chest to eye Nicholai- who stood to his feet.
"No one is going to die, so cut the dramatics." He came around to stand just behind Julius, who's body tensed up like he wouldn't know who to defend- they were all brothers.
But we were about to find out.
Crixus reached around Julius like a cobra striking Nicholai across the face unexpectedly, and we all stood to our feet and Alice stood in front of Sage who just watched his brother get hit, his eyes were unreadable but they were locked in on Crixus.
But that wasn't the reaction we were waiting for.
Nicholai sucked his bottom lip between his teeth, his tongue grazing the blood that oozed out of his busted lip before his face split into two, releasing a dry bitter huff like he expected that from Crixus. He simply turned and walked towards the entrance without a single look back, picking up his jacket along the way.
"You had to bring him up?" Riana broke the silence, her voice quaked.
"Rain.." We all had promised her that we wouldn't bring up her cousin, because she was only learning to cope with the lost and Crixus broke the truce. "I didn't.." But she had already left behind Nicholai with Alice and Sergio right behind her. "Riana wait!"
And that gave Sage the opportunity to give him a direct blow to the face that he would remember. "Don't ever do that again." He left behind them, going after his brother.
"What just happened?" Lorenzo turned to me like I held the answers. "How the hell did it turn into all of this?" He was right, we all were just fine not too long ago and now the group was dismantling faster than it was formed.
Julius sighed, pulling Crixus back to his feet. "You better count your blessings." He angled his head to the side to see the forming bruise. "You need ice."
"Thanks Doc." He rolled his eyes before he coughed, holding his face.
"Non sto scherzando con te." Julius ridiculed his little brother. "We don't have time for this and we are too involved to back out and you thought this was the perfect time for you to express your concerns about Emil? Pray that you get out of this alive, otherwise you'll end up just like him."
"Look, let's just take a break." I spoke. Continuing to argue wasn't going to fix anything but by the looks of it Crixus felt like he was responsible. "I'll go get them."
"I'll go with you." Lorenzo backed me up, already having a set of keys in his pocket if need be.
Julius followed behind us. "Fix your face." He scoffed to Crixus, leaving him alone for the meantime.
We stepped outside, the lanterns giving us a guide to see three shadowy figures. "Riana calm down." Sergio voice was the first one we heard when we grew closer.
"What's going on?" She was sitting on the curb with her head between her legs, trying to control her breathing but she was failing heavily.
"She's having an anxiety attack." Julius noted. "Give her some room." Alice came to stand next to me as Sergio hesitantly backed away from Riana.
"How do we help her?" Sergio asked but Julius was already on it. He bent down in front of her, hearing her small wails. "Hey," He reached behind her to rub her back soothingly. "Deep breaths." His voice was blocked by the wind, but from her inhaling and exhaling and bringing her head back up to look at him was a good sign. "Think of something that makes you happy." She closed her eyes, her rocking slowed.
We waited for almost fifteen minutes before she opened her eyes again, her tears now dry but still visibly on her face. "I'm sorry."
"Don't apologize." Julius held his hands out for her to take so she could get back to her feet. And she almost instantly fell into his arms.
"I need to go home." Riana didn't break away from Julius, she couldn't stand by herself just yet. "I need to see my family."
"I'll take you in the morning." He promised. She nodded her head, and he helped her back into the house with a close Sergio behind.
Sage came from out of nowhere, like he had been lurking in the shadows this entire time, pulling his phone away from his ear. "We need to go." It was plural but it singled out Alice and Lorenzo. "Now." He wasn't negotiating with me.
"Here." Lorenzo tossed the keys to Sage.
"Hey." Alice secured her hand around mine. "Be careful." Her hold tightened and I gave hers a light squeeze before letting go. "You know I will." I reassured her.
I had to jog to the car to catch up. "Where are we going?"
"Just get in the car." Sage mumbled.
I tried to form words while he drove to wherever we were going, it was familiar at first but we turned onto a road that was pitch black. "It's a shortcut." The road was bumpy as we bounced from side to side, my hand shot out to the dashboard to keep steady. "I have men following behind us just in case."
"We could have taken Alice and Lorenzo." I commented.
He looked over to me for a split second before rolling his eyes. "Lorenzo barely has two hands to operate let alone one, I'm not taking that chance."
"And Alice?" I poked. He craned his head before he made a sharp turn into a clear road with just us with the lurking trees. I turned my head and sure enough we were being followed by two trucks. "Well?" I snapped my head back around to question him.
"I'm not taking any chances." He settled back into the seat, we were going to be going straight for awhile.
"Do you like her, like her? Or just like?"
"First, grow up." He lectured me, before an idea took over his face. "But since you're asking do you like, like my brother or just like?"
"I asked you first."
"Rock, paper, scissors?" He held out his hand, looking over to see my bland expression. "Come on best two out of three?"
I rolled my eyes. "Just one." We shook our closed fist three times before his fingers split out into two and I kept my hand in a closed fist. "Now spill."
"I've never liked liked someone before." He admitted giving an awkward shoulder lift. "But I care.. if that counts."
"What would you do for her?" I quizzed him but he had caught on to me.
"Is this the big sister talk, don't hurt her and all that?" He grinned a boyish grin. "She's never asked me to do anything for her but I would if she would let me."
"She's the first girl to turn you down?"
"No." He shook his head. "She's just bitter that she liked the kiss we shared."
"What?"
"That's a long short story for another time filled with X's and O's." He pulled into the hotel that was oddly familiar, mainly because a shoot out happened the last time we were here. "Should I go get him or you?" He asked next, putting the car in park.
"Come with me." I knew he had men follow behind but he would be safer with me than outside with them. Nicholai's car was parked off to the side and it made me question why he was here. Sage directed me towards the back, clearly not wanting to go through the front like a normal person. There were holes in the door from the altercation still. "So they weren't going to fix this?"
"The cameras don't work." He pointed above us and sure enough both cameras were hanging on thin ice. "It's run down anyway." We walked up the stairs, seeing two mice huddled in the corner. "So mice can reproduce but I can't?"
"Sage, shut up." I pushed him forward so they had privacy. "Maybe they're just cold."
"Right." He drawled out, opening the emergency door for me to go through first. "Make a left." He directed me like I wasn't familiar with this place. The smell of cigarettes and alcohol clouded my senses and my skin began to itch, the walls were even more crustier than before. "I did not miss this place." We made the last turn to the hallway that held the room number. Our steps came to a halt seeing Nicholai with his back to the wall, his left hand dangling a beer bottle in between his legs that were pulled up to his chest.
"I'm going to uh.. I'm going to wait over here." Sage was uncomfortable seeing him like this and he went back around the corner, leaving me with him.
I took slow baby steps not to sure of how he was going to react. His eyes opened briefly before they shut again seeing it was just me. On the opposite side of him was another beer and his gun. "You know if you're going to drink at least get the good kind." I stood in front of him.
"I'll keep that in mind." He took a sip before he grimaced. "It's not my favorite but it was his."
I crouched down onto my knees. "Who's?"
"Emil's." He swallowed hard, his voice was hard and cold and sober. I looked around him to see there was still faded blood stains and he was sitting where Emil had fallen. I stripped his beer bottle from his hands to place it next to its match.
My hand went to his bottom lip that had dry blood on, seeing he made no effort to get rid of it. His eyes snapped open, his grey eyes staring always with curiosity but this time they were light red around his cornea. "Tell me about him." I mumbled. He shook his head, his right hand closing around mine to pull it away.
"You should leave." He told me.
"And go where?"
"I should have never involved you in this." His bottom lip separated from its top, a shaky breath rippled through. He was talking to himself more so than me. "Selfish." He mumbled, closing his eyes to let his thoughts consume him like the alcohol did.
"Nic, what are you talking about?"
My eyebrows creased in, not hearing anything he said but I caught the end. "It's not safe." But maybe he meant himself.
"Stop." I stripped his hands away from his hair, his knuckles were beat red from his grip. I brushed the pad of my thumbs over them to soothe the ache. He tried to pull away from me like my touch stung. "Hey.." I moved his legs apart to get closer; something I've never done. "Look at me." But he didn't comply.
My hands closed around his face, my right hand going under his chin to push it up. "Nic, look at me."
He tiredly brought his head back up to give me what I wanted. "His death is on me Olivia, and I know." His breathing was turning shallow. "I know." He tried to hang his head again but I didn't let him. "I shouldn't have gotten you involved.." He kept going but I stopped him again, he didn't need to beat himself up over the situation.
"You didn't, I did this on my own." That had to be made clear. "It was my choice."
"And it was the wrong one." His hands felt like brittle as they closed around mine to pull them down to rest just before his chest.
"It's too late now." We couldn't go back three months to change what was already been put in place, what was done was done. "I'm here." I sat back on my heels, ready to stay for as long as he decided he was going to remain on this floor.
He dropped my left hand, it limply fell by his hip, as he brushed my cheek with the back of his right hand before turning it over to guide his fingers down my neck. He stopped just above my heart and I attempted to keep myself in check, my heart pumping wildly.
He could feel it, no doubt about it, and he took my right hand to place over his so I could feel his was just the same. "I never gave him a proper death." He stopped before he tried again. "A proper goodbye.. I just stepped over him like he didn't lay his life on the line but I could only think of one thing."
I crinkled my eyes, trying relive that morning. "We had to get out." It was simple enough.
"No." He inhaled. "I needed to get you out."
"I can take care of myself." This was my one hundredth time repeating this. "Besides we didn't like each other that much back then."
"Back then?" His eyes twinkled with mischief, finally, and I hung my head with a smile pulling at my lips but he snagged my head back up gently.
"You're still you and I'm still me." I shrugged nonchalantly. "We just hate each other a little less."
"I never hated you." He corrected my undertake. We were centimeters from each other.
His words rang in my ear. "I didn't hate you either." I fiddled with his hand awkwardly and he turned mine over to trance the accidental cut on the outside of mine, just below my thumb.
"When this is over.." He hesitated. "I would like to take you somewhere, like on a.. uhm.." He fumbled over the word and I made no effort to help him.
"On a what?" I encouraged him.
"When two people go and have dinner and when the night is over the boy walks the girl to her door to kiss her goodnight." He illustrated a movie scene and I couldn't help but laugh. "What?" He was genuinely confused and worried for my response.
"You mean a date with holding hands, and you bring me flowers and I let you pay for dinner?"
"What kind of flowers?" He asked.
I froze but responded almost instantly,"Orchids."
"You don't favor them." He observed my slight change of body language.
"They're a close second right behind Anemone, I just prefer the blue ones my mom loved purple. There's a field in New Zealand."
"Have you been?" Was his next question.
"Uh.. I'm not sure, I had a dream once about them.. I was just standing there and it felt almost real." The sun basking on my tan skin, kissing my eyelids while the tips of my fingers touched the seasonal flowers. "Probably just a distant memory." Another one I couldn't trace back, it was lost just like the others.
"But to answer your question." I didn't dwell on what couldn't be fixed. "When this is over and you're not officially married.. I'll let you know." He leaned in; I backed away. "Preferably when you don't have corona on your breath."
"Hm." He roughly cupped the back of my head and my self control evaporated when he tried again, he was hard to resist but it was short lived.
"Alright before you go ripping at each other, can we please go back home I just killed three spiders for the sake of this." We took our time breaking apart from each other. Nicholai cut his eyes to his brother, who wouldn't look at him directly.
I stood to my feet and one swift motion and Nicholai picked up his gun along the way, leaving just the discarded beers. Sage swayed back and forth, letting out a sired whistle here and there and Nicholai stood in front of him.. waiting.
Sage slapped his brother with little to no effort; it wasn't as hard as it should have been. "Next time if you go off by yourself, make sure I'm in the passenger seat."
Nicholai barely had to look down at him; they were equal. "Open the car door quicker next time." Sage wrapped him in a hug before they patted each other's back twice. "Let's go."
Sage took the lead and exiting the hotel, kicking one of the mice down the stairs as we descended. "Rude." I huffed, watching him or her bounce down the stairs like a tumbleweed. I walked in the direction of the car that Sage and I came in, but a hand tugged me in the opposite direction.
"This way." Nicholai beckoned his head towards his and my feet shifted to follow after him.
"I can't stay." I didn't want to push my luck, and I didn't like being apart from my family that could need me at any minute.
"I will." He volunteered himself up to warm up my bed and I didn't stop him, his company wasn't bad to have.
I kept reading the time: 8:37.. 8:46.. 9:02.
"Does your brother know?" I looked over, my eyes drooping down before they closed not getting his reaction but I continued so he would answer right. "About what you're planning?"
"I'll tell you in the morning." His voice went in and out but I caught it.
"You promise?" I yawned.
"Yes." He rubbed my hand and I felt his lips touch the back of hand like a whispered butterfly.
"I love you."
The words fading into a dream.
•••
Who said it first? Lawd my children doing too much now.. I'll be back, they need a timeout. (Fictional characters, that is)