Saturday.
I woke up from a head splitting headache and flooded messages from Chae asking me "What the fuck went through your mind last night that you decided to drink that much and have the audacity to pass out like a dead goldfish infront of me???"
Bitch I died. I died. My dignity died.
I threw my phone on the other side if the bed and held my head, trying to nurse the hammering pain whacking every inch of my brain. Memories from last night slowly flashed back into my mind. Bar... Ryujin.. kiss... kiss!
The kiss.
Images slowly started to unwrap themselves and flash before my eyes. I can't remember anything but the kiss. The kiss was still clear. I really wish it wasn't tho.
Did... I really want more? I mean, did I really want it? She didn't push me to do it, I was the one who had the freaking guts to push the kiss saying "then do it" without hesitation. And after we pulled away? Did I? What does the kiss make us? And Lia— oh my God, Lia. Lia didn't even cross my mind last night. Oh shit. Im so screwed.
I groaned. The pain pounding my head was the worst, and it's still early in the morning. The memories just made my head hurt more. And more.
Deciding that beating myself up about it wouldn't do me any good, I cleaned myself up and refreshed my mind with some food. There is no way in hell that I'm gonna stay like this, still in my clothes from last night that reek of alcohol and other nasty smell.
After a good bath and some hangover medicine, I plopped myself down on the soft sheets of the matress face first and let out a deep sigh. I plopped over and stared at the ceiling, trying my best to think straight (tho I am obviously not) but still failed to gather my thoughts.
If I really wanted more of that kiss, then what happens to Lia?
She's already your ex.
And what's with me and Ryujin?
You're just friends.
Friends? Friends don't do what we did last night.
You were drunk.
I was.
Did you really want more of it?
Well—
My thoughts and debate with myself were cut off when my phone started to buzz on the other side of the bed where I threw it a few moments ago. Trying my best to reach it without moving from my spot, my heart almost dropped as I saw the caller ID flashing on the screen.
"H-hey." I greeted.
"Uh-uhm yeah, hi..." Ryujin trailed off.
"Why.. why are you calling?"
Silence. She wasn't speaking at all, though I can hear her breaths from the other end of the call.
"Hello? Ryujin?"
"PLEASEGOTOTHEAMUSEMENTPARKWITHME!" Ryujin said in one breath. I couldn't even make out anything from what she said.
"What?"
There was a sigh at the other line. "I.. Yeji, go to the amusement park with me later this afternoon. Please?" She said, slower and definitely calmer from her first attempt.
"I can't." I swallowed the lump forming on my throat. If lying is the only way to save my remaining dignity then so be it. And of course! I really don't want to! Everything would just be so so awkward!
"Why?"
"I still have the hangover from last night." I reasoned out. Well, it's true anyways.
"From the alcohol or from my kiss?"
"What the— of course it's from the alcohol!"
"You're so defensive." She snorted.
"Ugh! You're so annoying."
I dropped the call right away, not wanting to hear more of her laugh from the other line. After that, the familiar tone chimed in on my phone.
From ryujin devil
i'll be there in 30 mins
you have no choice, the recording's still w me
see you! 🤪
I groaned and rolled over on the bed like a worm sprinkled with sea salt, wriggling for it's dear life. Everything that's happening just made me think if my life would be better if I just become a worm. Okay, maybe I am overreacting but still— hello?
I wasn't ready to see her. I would never be. I don't know how I would show my face to her after what happened.
But I stood up, and prepared. Of course, knowing what crazy woman Shin Ryujin is, she'd really pop right outside my door in 30 mins and pester me more.
Right when I was about to finish preparing my bag, my doorbell rang. And when I opened the door, Ryujin was already there with some comfy fit and her little yellow backpack hanging on her shoulder.
"I don't want to gooooo." I said, trying my best to avoid her gaze.
"You don't want to go but you're already done preparing?" She asked.
"I was about to sleep again."
"Reasons." She replied and held my arm. "Let's just go! I'll really post the recording, try me."
I snorted. "I know for a fact that you don't have enough guts to do that."
She smirked.
"Right, I don't have the guts to give this to the media. But I can pass this to my friends and you're friends. You know how fast things spread, right?"
I rolled my eyes.
"Not the amusement park! I still have a hangover. I'm seriously gonna puke all over you." I threatened.
"I'll be the one driving! You can sleep while I drive."
I sighed and looked at her. She was serious. I heaved another sigh before nodding and going back to my room to gather my things in the bag.
Locking my condo, Ryujin immediately held my hand and went straight to drag me until we reached the parking lot. Before getting inside the driver's seat of her car, she turned to me on the shotgun and smiled.
"Let's go?"
———
shinramyunjin: 🛣
———
Ryujin woke me up when we arrived. Lightly tapping me on my shoulders, my eyes fluttered open to an amusement park where I can even see kids running around from the distance, and many more.
"Baby, we're here. Wake up." She said.
I shook my head awake.
We both put our sunglasses and caps before going out. There is less people than what you would expect since it was a weekend. A saturday, to be exact.
I prayed silently to the Gods that no one would recognize us or even turn their head to our direction, but who am I kidding? How could you not attract attention when you're Shin Ryujin?
But still, it was kind of relieving since no one asked for pictures or such. Maybe they're not fans of dancers like us so they're not familiar. We kept our heads low and bought tickets at the entrance. That's when I noticed the pastel pink instax camera hanging on her neck.
"We're bringing that?" I pointed to the camera.
"Yup. For our adventures."
That's cute.
Wait what?
"Ready?" She said, looking at my direction. Our gazes met and my heart clenched a little.
My brain was telling me not to go with her while I still can. To avoid her. To not let her get any closer. And deeper. Avoid another attachment.
For Lia.
But... everything else inside me was screaming that I should go with her. She had this strong pull that I just can't resist.
I shook my head. I will spend my day with her without feeling any kind of attraction, to prove that what I have been feeling was just from the spur of the moment kind of feelings. Because I should only feel that way for one woman and that's Lia.
Not Ryujin.
So I nodded.
For Lia.
I pulled Ryujin to the side to avoid people.
"What's the plan?" I asked while still looking around.
"Extreme Tower!" Ryujin said like an excited kid.
I nodded and let her lead the way since she was the one holding the map. I was on guard and avoided making eye contact to anyone.
The line was still short since the park just opened. As we got closer and closer for our turn, my stomach began to flip. I already felt nauseous just by looking at the talk tower. I got nervous at the thought that I might puke once we're being let go at the top. Well, that would be a sight.
I swallowed. "Are you sure about this? Can't we just start with the Carousel?"
She snorted and turned to face me.
"You're scared?"
"Normally, no. But right now with my hangover, yes. I feel like I would puke any second." I admitted.
She laughed. "Trust me, you won't!"
We couldn't finish our conversation because it was finally our turn. We sat side by side and she held my hand and gave me a reassuring smile. I smiled back shortly before closing my eyes shut. Then I acted like I wasn't affected at all throughout the ride despite the fact the she was holding my hand. I denied that I felt something. I didn't. I didn't. I didn't.
We screamed our lungs out once we were falling. Well, I did most of the screaming.
I was kinda shaking after we got down, while Ryujin was just beaming. Curse those people who actually enjoy things like these.
Ryujin stopped by the photobooth and I joined her. Okay. Where's the justice in the fact that she still looked good while I looked like some ghost with my mouh wide open when the photo was taken? Damn it.
Ryujin laughed when she saw the pictures.
"Let's go," I said.
"Wait. I'll take the pictures."
"Why?!"
"Remembrance."
I rolled my eyes and just let her be. She's gonna use it against me for sure.
And, I was right. She teased me about it as we made our way to our next destination: Anchor's Away. I ignored her because I seriously don't have the time to listen to her when my heart was pounding so hard I could actually feel my bile going up to my esophagus because of the ride she wanted to get onto.
I stopped on our tracks and considered leaving her since she kept walking. I don't have any problems with theme parks but then, I have a hangover.
When she noticed that I wasn'f following her, she turned and walked back. She pulled on my arm.
"I'm sure I'm gonna puke on this one."
"Go ahead. As long as you puke on them, not me." She said with a small laugh.
For the short span of minutes that we waited on the line, I prepared myself and tried to calm my stomach. I will not make a disgusting scene. Not now. Never.
But when it was our turn, guess where Ryujin decided to sit? Yes, at the last seats. Near the helm of the ship.
Ryujin held my hand tightly and as we slowly went up, I could feel the anticipation slowly eating my insides. I was sure I was losing all my color.
"I'm gonna puke." I whispered.
"Conceal. Don't feel. Don't let it go."
I glared at her for qouting Elsa.
"Not heLPIIIIIIIIIING!!"
When the ship started swinging down, it was like my heart just fell out from my vagina. Like my internal organs were being pulled out one by one. I cursed Ryujin endless times in my head for making me ride this damn ship.
When we got down the ship, I heaved a deep sigh and bent down. I didn't puke but damn, it feels like my soul was left at the top. My throat went dry from screaming.
"All right, let's take a rest. You look like you're about to pass out. Come on, let's eat." She said lively.
I kept glaring at her as we were walking down to the food stalls. I didn't want to eat because I feel like I'd puke right away. But because Ryujin was so insistent, I ate. It wasn't like I couldn't refuse her. I really tried, but I couldn't.
After eating, we walked around and Ryujin saw this huge stuffed bear that was a prize on one of the games.
"You like bears?"
She nodded.
"Okay, I'll get it for you."
Fuck. My cheeks flushed when I realized what just came out of my own mouth. I don't even know why I said that. I'm doing a really bad job that I didn't feel any different for her.
No, friends also give each other gifts. And this, is one of those times. This doesn't mean anything.
"I'm feeling giddy," Ryujin giggled and bumped her shoulder with mine. My cheeks went hotter.
"I think you have a crush on me." I said nonchalantly while trying to redirect the attention back to her.
She just winked at me and my heart fluttered.
"You're so annoying!" I said, moving to the games faster.
I hearf her laugh from behind and I just got embarrased more. I decided to focus on the game instead.
It was the usual game you see on an amusement park. The one with metal rods on loops and you must not hit the metal with or the bulb will light up, and you lose.
Ryujin picked the seat beside me and our eyes met before we started to play. We both laughed at how easily we lost. We were terrible.
She gave up on the 3rd try, but I didn't.
When I was about to hand the gamekeeper my payment for a 6th try, Ryujin put her hand on me.
"Yeji, that's enough. You're wasting money."
"I don't want to. I told you I'd get that for you." I said determinedly.
But Ryujin just pulled me away. "But I already have something better than that bear."
That made me curious so I followed her after she let me go.
"Huh?"
"This."
It was an instax picture of me while playing, with all the bears and other prizes on the background. At the bottom of the picture, she wrote something in her silly handwriting. "A for effort!"
I don't know what's with her fascination with me but it was definitely making me feel well liked and appreciated. I felt special.
I swallowed a forming lump on my throat.
"Y-you brought a marker?"
I didn't want to dwell on whatever I was feeling at the moment so I tried to divert the attention back to her again.
She just chuckled.
"Yeah. I'm prepared."
I just smiled.
Ryujin and I kept walking untik she stopped and spreaded the map infront of her face.
"Yeji," Ryujin called and I stood beside her to see where she was planning to go next.
She raised the map even higher, covering both of our faces. My brows furrowed.
"Yeji," She called once again.
When I turned to face her, everything happened so fast. So fast that I don'g even know if what happened was real or just a figment of my imagination.
But the lingering sensation of her lips on mine and the electricity that coursed through my veins were enough proof that I wasn't imagining things.
"Yes," She beamed. "A kiss in a public place in the broad daylight."
Then she just walked away like nothing happened. I followed her, dumbfounded.
After that kiss, we rode rides with few people and also tried other booths. I was unable to determine if the loud thumping of my heart and the adrenaline running through my veins were because of Ryujin, or just the activities we tried. The uncomfortable feeling in my stomach turned into a ticklish sensation because of her closeness.
And the truth was, I enjoyed spending the day with her. I gave up on trying to push her away from me. I can't, specially when she was genuinely trying to make me smile, when all I could see is pure happiness and sincerity in her eyes, when she made sure that I was having fun.
We rode every ride we could, the Rio Grande being the very last. It was like a river and you get on a small boat shaped like a log, and you drop from a great height like a rollercoaster, just that here, you're splashing straight to the water. We were both unlucky because we got wet after the ride, and we laughed all the way back to her car.
I shivered as I stood by her car.
"What are you doing there?" She asked before getting inside.
"It'll get wet."
"It's okay. Get in and change your shirt."
I entered the passenger seat without leaning my back on the seat.
"I didn't bring a shirt." I admitted.
"I brought one for you. I told you, I'm prepared."
She gave me a white loose shirt with her name in small fonts around the chest area of the shirt.
"You really gave me the shirt that has your name on it?"
"So they'll know you're mine."
I hit her head with my hand and she just laughed at me.
"Go change. The windows are heavily tinted so that shouldn't be a problem."
Yeah, like that was my problem. I was confident with my body. But changing in such a closed space with just me and Ryujin, that's kinda awkward.
She started removing her shirt, so I looked away. God, why did the car suddenly heat up? The aircon is turned on right? I shook my head and changed my shirt immediately.
"Nice abs," Ryujin said with a wink when I turned to her. My cheeks heated up.
"Pervert!"
I could feel myself blushing. She actually looked. I got out of the car before my stupid mouth could say anything and I can hear her laughs a few steps behind me.
We got back inside the park for one more ride. It was the Ferris Wheel. Finally, something that wouldn't make my soul leave my body.
When we got inside one of the ferris wheel's space, she immediately took out her phone and invited me for a selfie. And unlike last time, this time, I beamed at the camera. Ryujin also took a photo of me in her instax camera and wrote, "date with the idol!" I did the same and took a picture of her.
When we stopped at the very top, I can see the sun setting from the horizon. It was purples, and pinks, and red and oranges. It was beautiful.
"Yeji," Ryujin called me.
"Hmm?"
She put her right hand on my cheek and slowly leaned. Everything was in slow motion. I saw her eyes move from my nose, and to my lips. I saw how her brown eyes captivated mine before it closed and she leaned in.
I closed my eyes and waited for her lips to land in mine, almost out of instinct. When it did, I kind of hoped that just maybe, time would stop. The feeling of guilt was present, but the feeling of wanting to kiss her more was there, again.
She pressed her lips softly before finally moving back.
Ryujin took another kiss from my cheek and smiled at me.
"Second sunset. A kiss at the top of the ferris wheel."
———
shinramyunjin: best i've ever experienced ✨
hwangyeddong_: no regrets 💫
———
tadaaaa! another update wowowowow *shocked*
this one is a long ass update, probably because pts and exams are coming up and i may not have the time to write anything for two weeks. also, after posting this i'm gonna make a salad. yes, a salad. pray that i don't burn our kitchen, yeah?
anyways, don't forget to vote for itzy on MAMA! Wannabe SOTY! and don't forget to vote through tweets! also, check out my twt acc *coughs*
take care everyone! until next update <33
aden