Syllable For The Day - 'Barrier'
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KIERA'S POV
All had slept. I was tired with the kids running around. Grace was busy accompanying her mother-in-law. They seemed to have a good bond.
She seemed very fond of Grace. She only made a small chat with me, the one which included my background and all, nothing more.
Being here, I felt that I was the Nanny and not a family member. I realized how good Grace was treating me this whole time. She never made me feel like I was just a Nanny to her kids.
She was kind.
"Hey, what are you thinking?" It was Grace. She had a jug in her hand and she was in a rob.
"Nothing much just that...how well you treat me." I smiled at her.
"Don't think too much. Mom is like that only. She'll accept you gradually. And well, if you want her acceptance this bad, why not take a step ahead?" She winked at me and my eyes widened.
"Grace, my girl!" I screeched slowly. I shook my head and looked away. It was silent and I was thinking about Grace's statement.
I wondered how Alan would react if he knew that I'd harboured feelings for him. It still was a hard fact for me to accept.
"Do you think I could take a step ahead?" I asked Grace. Maybe she could help me realize what should I exactly do.
"What step?" I heard a different voice and with a flash speed, I turned my head to face Alan. My eyes completely wide but then I blinked rapidly.
"What step? No step! When did you come here? Were you sneaking up on me?" I blabbered constantly in worry. He came and sat on the sofa, beside me.
"Just now. Not sneaking." He answered my previous question and I just nodded.
"Not asleep yet?" He asked and then I looked at him. He still was in his suit from the morning. The one in which he was looking sexy. I stopped my thoughts.
"No. You just returned home?" It was almost midnight. I can't believe he worked so much. But back at the mansion, he used to come back soon.
"Don't like this mansion." He said and looked ahead. He was rather stiff. There was something over here that he was uncomfortable with.
For a person to not like such a big and great mansion, he sure must've had a good reason.
"Go and get changed. I'll heat the food for you." I muttered and stood up. I didn't want him to feel uncomfortable with me around him.
Without another word, he stood up and walked to his room. I understood that he agreed with my statement.
I heated the food and just on time, Alan came downstairs. His hair was a little wet and he was looking sexy. I had every urge to pin him down but I didn't.
"Here, have it." I passed the plate with food in it. He gave me one curt nod and started eating. I just sat there watching him eat. He had no expressions about how he felt about my continuous gaze on him.
"Done." He said once he finished his food. I paused him and he gave me a questioning face.
"There is sauce..." I started but my voice faded as my hand involuntarily went to wipe the right corner of the bottom lip.
The moment my finger touched his lip, the softness had me struck. I halted completely and we both gazed at each other.
I couldn't find it in me to let go. Desire pulsed through me. We were just one counter away.
I leaned towards him, but he kept still. I took this as an opportunity to think that he wasn't rejecting me.
We were so close and that our breaths mingled. Our lips were about to touch when a loud noise erupted.
It was Alan's spoon that fell on the plate. Our reverie broke and I realized what I was about to do.
I stepped back and retracted my hand immediately. I took the plate a d put it in the sink and turned to Alan.
"I think...we...better sleep...I mean...in our rooms. I think I should go." I mentally face palmed myself for saying out such things.
I dashed out the next second and ran to find my room and locked myself in.
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ALAN'S POV
I couldn't fathom what would've happened if not for my hand giving away the strength and the spoon falling off.
I felt like I was locked in her gaze. Kiera was so open about her advances but also shy at the same time.
Neither I nor my body knew how to react in such situations. My hand touched that part of the lip where Kiera's hand was, just a few moments ago.
My mind completely went back to the time she kissed me on the New Year's party. At that time, she was drunk but now, she was sober.
What could be the possible explanation for her this move? I put my head in my hands and bugged my mind to give me possible reasons.
Kiera was a person who did what she wanted. She didn't give many thoughts. She did and said whatever she had on mind.
I walked back to my room and laid down on the bed. I closed my eyes but the earlier images wouldn't leave my mind.
"Ah!" I woke up annoyed. I needed counselling. I felt like I was taking too much counselling these days. I picked up my phone and dialled a number. I knew I was going to face the wrath of yells, but I couldn't stop myself.
"Can you ever...even for once consider that I might be sleeping?!" I heard the very obvious and known yell. I just waited for her to finish. When she sounded calm, I decided to open my mouth.
"Kiera was about to kiss me," I said and heard a loud visible gasp from the other side. It was inevitable since Billy was a queen of reactions.
"What did you do? Did you push her away insensitively?! Or did you kiss her voluntarily??" She excited changing her tone from questioning to harsh to excited. I could only try to keep up with her tone changes.
"None," I answered as it was true.
"Why do you always do something else then what I think you must've done?!" I didn't respond to her question.
"Spoon fell from my hand. She ran away." I answered and she hummed.
"Alan, it seems like you are willing to accept but your body isn't capable enough to these changes. On one hand, where I'm glad for the progress you've made, but as a doctor, I'd like to ask you to slow down. Rapid changes may damage your mental built health." She suggested and I couldn't do anything but accept it.
"But what if I'm willing?" I questioned. I was curious to know. If my mind caused all my problems, and if my mind was ready, will my body still reject it?
"Okay. Since you are willing. You go ahead. But, I'm still warning you not to take too hard on you. While, lending shoulder, helping with a zip, making a friend and drinking together seemed tough for you, you can only imagine how will you handle a process of kissing?" Billy questioned but I had no answer.
"In all the previous incidents, you were overcoming your mental barrier. The barrier that was derived from your physical barrier. There is no direct skin-to-skin touch. They were you trying to be helpful and a bit social which you avoided in the past." Billy cleared and I couldn't refuse her because she was right.
"And don't even mention last time. You made your mind agree that it happened because Kiera was drunk and unknown but this time, it was sober. Will you be able to hold her, touch her and kiss her voluntarily?" Billy was indeed serious when she said that.
I gave my thoughts to her words and I didn't seem like I could handle that. There were too many steps that I had to cross.
"I can't," I answered truthfully.
"I'm not trying to discourage you, but as my patient, I need to take care of you and see that you don't push your limits too hard and too fast. It would only damage you. I suggest you take baby steps. While holding hand is your biggest fear, try to touch the skin. Are you getting my point?" She questioned and I hummed in response.
"Your part of fear overcame by high-five. You remember that is your physical improvement. Now, compare a high-five with a kiss and you'll know the difference." She pointed out and when I put them together, I realised she was right.
While it seemed not much, I internally knew there were many steps to happen in between just that I haven't figured out what those steps could be.
"While I love that you're changing but don't change too much that you'll lose yourself. This is a part of you and everyone should accept it and let you walk through your own pace." I hummed again.
"Good night," I muttered and hung up the call.
What was I supposed to do now? I was indeed lost. I had hope that I could overcome my fears but I never thought that these deep fears that were instilled in my for this long wouldn't be gone in a few days.
I needed time to adjust to this. I needed time to know the in-between steps.
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While Kiera tried her best to help and be normal, I could see that she was holding back. I, on the other hand, was learning to handle all my emotions and feelings. I had to.
It was a few days and Kiera and I were keeping our distance. Both of us had our problems. We were also back at Alex's mansion. Kiera and I try to avoid seeing each other as much as possible.
Even though it was for my benefit, I felt lonely. A feeling that I was rather very familiar with. I felt like my blossom was stopped in the mid and there was nothing I could do but wait for my favourable weather to return.
"Alan." I heard my name from that voice I wasn't talking to. I somehow felt really good hearing that voice. I turned and my eyes held a little hope, a hope that it was indeed my favourable weather.
"Kiera." I then realised how badly I wanted to call out her name. This weird feeling was different. It felt like something close to my heart.
"Alan, I know you've been avoiding me and it's not a surprise that I'm doing the same. I just wanted to say sorry. Even after knowing about your condition, I feel like I pushed too hard. I'm sorry. But these feelings are hard for me to keep in. I can't deal with these avoiding and ignoring. Can we go back to normal and try to take it slow? Like, baby steps?" She said and her words had put everything that I wanted to ask her.
"Yes." She gave me a wide smile. I had a small smile placed on my face. She extended her arms and was about to jump on me, but paused. She face-palmed herself then waved her first finger in a denial action.
"Baby steps." She muttered and raised her hand above. I gave her a nod and immediately gave her the high-five.
"Baby steps," I muttered as if we had sealed it with not kisses but matching words.
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"What do you think about this?" Grace had been online shopping for our little Angela, Lilac's daughter. She wanted to buy Christmas presents and she was torturing me and Alex.
"I have work," I muttered and was about to leave when she glared me. I gulped down and sat back at my place. She was scary.
"This is the reason I wanted daughters! You won't talk! Alex can't stop talking and having sex! If my sons grow up to be like you both, I might turn them into girls! You better train them well!" Grace yelled.
I looked at Alex and wanted to smack a stupid in the name for a brother. He really can't even soothe his wife down.
"Let me help," I said and walked towards her and she flashed me a smile. I was still scared. Getting on Grace's bad side was not even the last thing on my list.
Let my brother handle all her wrath. I'd better just have her praises.
Everything looked the same to me. I didn't know how to differentiate anymore. I felt a long tap on my shoulder.
"I don't think this is pretty enough. I think we should get those cute rompers with a pair of cute sparkly boots. What say?" Kiera asked and diverted Grace's attention.
"Yes! That's lovely. Let's do one thing. Distribute the work. I almost have a list of gifts ready. I'll get the gifts, you get the Christmas utilities. Christmas is just a week away, so we need to hurry." Grace said and Kiera nodded.
"Okay, then. I'll help you with the food list. I also wanted to add a few things for Ethan and Tristan." Kiera looked energetic and I only started to feel worse.
"Alan, you'll go with Kiera to get the utilities and the Christmas tree." She ordered.
"Okay," I muttered.
"Then, it's settled!" Grace clapped cheerfully whereas I and Alex gave each other pitiful looks.
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"I thought we were earning well enough to afford a few workers to get everything. Why does she drag me everywhere like a common man?!" Alex complained as we both sat in the office.
"Normal couple things," I muttered and he shut his mouth.
"People always thought I was the rude one, if only they had faced your wrath! I'll have Martin go with Ace. That woman is as scary as much as she's cute and lovely and amazing." He said with a smile.
"Can't be more whipped," I commented and looked down to the file. I read the file and sighed.
"Have to go to Japan," I muttered as I shut the file.
"That young Mr Oshiwara is rather too ambitious. He has to be shown in his place. I'll go with Grace. It's been a long time that we went anywhere, anyways." He commented and I gave him a look.
"What?" He questioned as he realised that I was still glaring him.
"Santorini?" I questioned and he gave me a questioning look.
"What? We all went there. I and Grace didn't even have much time together." He complained.
"Needy," I commented and decided I'd mark away from the important points that we should discuss further.
"Wait until your time comes." He sounded as if he was warning me ahead of time.
"We'll see." I shook him off and we both set to crack this deal with profits to be held in our hands.
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"Era, it's getting late," I muttered to Kiera who was trying to find something.
"Alan! Wait a minute! I just...found it!" She yelled as she held on the paper.
"Should be organised," I said but she narrowed her eyes at me. I kept my face blank.
"Dare you to taunt me again... I'll... I'll kiss you!" An involuntary cough escaped my mouth trying to cover up the shock by her statement. She just smirked at me.
"Alan, it's getting late." She mocked me and all I could do was follow her.
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We finally reached the store. Kiera was rushing as if she was going to lose something. And when I saw why she was running, I just kept my mouth shut.
So many people were around that I had no intention of stepping inside. Kiera had successfully got a trolley which she brought like a trophy.
"Why did we come here?" I questioned.
"You'll get all the utilities here. I know you don't like the touch and proximity, so you be in charge of the trolley. You just have to stand here and try to protect the stuff. Understood?" She asked me and I just blinked at her rapidly.
"Okay?" She gave me two thumbs up and I copied her movements with confusion instilled in me.
She pulled out the sanitizer and sanitized the handle of the trolley and then sprayed some sanitizer on my hands, too.
I was surprised to see her bring that since I had completely forgotten it.
"I know how much you're already suffering. I thought I'd make you a little comfortable." She winked and I let out a small chuckle.
I stood at one place for what felt like two days but it was merely two hours. I amount of money I've earned was enough to buy the whole items in this place, yet here I was, struggling and protecting things.
"Let's go. Do one thing, go and hold the line at the counter. I'm coming with one last ingredient." I nodded and carefully made my way.
I just stood at the counter and a lady pushed me, purposefully. I just looked at her but she wasn't moving. I thought of letting her go but another voice beat me to it.
"How dare you push your way in the queue?!" Kiera yelled and I was glad about the mask and cap on my face or this would be on the headlines.
Billionaire caught amidst woman quarrels in the store, just for getting their queue cut by the other person.
My mind made up the story but before anything, I came back to reality. I was about to touch Kiera's shoulder and pull her back when the other woman held my wrist.
My eyes widened.
"You b*tch! How the hell did you dare touch my husband like that?!" Kiera yelled and pushed the woman back with full force.
In the entire situation, the word 'husband' rang in my ears and my heart went all weird.
A/N - So, so, so, so...HOW WAS THE CHAPTER? Hehe. I seem too excited. I am, indeed.
Recently, my birthday had passed, on the 13th of November, few people had commented on the book and also DMed me. I thank you guys a lot.
This chapter was supposed to be a gift to you guys but I was a little late. I was to update in the noon but because of some issues, half of my chapter was lost. So, I rewrote it.
I hope you guys weren't very sad because of the notification and no chapter. Specially Elafbagsariya and NoorazimaAliFaisal who immediately texted about the chapter and were worried about not being able to read. I thank you both. Loads of love.
I hope all the readers are happy now that I updated soon. I had to write it and publish it today itself, so I did.
Also, ShivaniKoirala and GeetanjaliSharma948 thank you for being new and supportive readers. Keep on voting and commenting.
I'm really glad and happy about this book. Whatever the turn is, you guys have been supportive of it and have been showering it with love.
Even though very limited people have been reading this book, I love you guys, a lot. But on the other hand, I would appreciate it if you shared the book so Alan and Kiera could receive a little more love.
This is the first draft, I'm publishing. I'll edit it tomorrow. Until then, I hope you guys enjoyed my gift to you'll and will be waiting for the next chapter.
With love, Nia.