I PULL ON loose strings from my ripped jeans as I wait for Mr. Ray to finish his phone call with Daniel. I'm sure that he won't be nearly as ecstatic about my newfound friendships when he finds that I missed an important test because of my social life.
"Your foster dad is on the way," Mr. Ray tells me upon pressing the red button. "I didn't realize you were adopted."
"I'm not officially adopted," I murmur, "it's a long story."
"I'm trying to say that I understand you are angry and feel that you need to be reckless, but please keep Julie out of that, okay?" he asks sincerely. "I trust that you can be a good kid, so try, please."
I blink. Does he think Julie getting in trouble was my fault?
"What's that supposed to mean?" I ask slowly, straightening from my nonchalant slouched position.
"I don't know what's going on with my daughter anymore," he says, sighing. "And as far as I know, you're the only thing that changed in her life."
I blink again.
"Mr. Molina, we didn't lie to you when we said we overslept at Flynn's house," I reply. "She didn't wake us up. We didn't mean to miss school. Julie lied about everything being okay because she didn't want to stress you. You're already under a lot of pressure."
He nods, finally understanding me. "Next time be more careful, okay? I don't want her Aunt Victoria to break up your friendship because she thinks you're a bad influence."
So that's who this really is coming from. Aunt Victoria.
I peer around the hallway to see her eavesdropping. She widens her eyes at being discovered.
"I didn't mean to accuse you, mija," she begins, thinking it would soften the blow to use an affectionate term.
Yeah, right.
"Eso es exactamente lo que has querido decir," I respond in Spanish, surprised that I remember that much. "No mientas."
My Spanish has been improving.
At least that's one class that I won't fail.
"Chiquita," she starts, putting an arm out in my direction.
I shake my head, not wanting false sympathy. Aunt Victoria is new to me, so I don't know if she is the type of person to talk trash behind my back, then feel guilty when I find out. The pattern usually doesn't break with people like that.
I dash out to the porch and sit on the steps, trying not to cry. No matter what I do, everyone thinks I'm a mistake.
"Why didn't I die?" I mumble, pulling up my knees to my chest. "That would have been better."
It seems like I've been causing more problems than fixing them.
"Hey, don't say that," a guy tells me. I recognize that voice.
"Reggie?" I mutter softly. "That you?"
"Yup," he replies, sitting down next to me. "I can tell you there is a handful of people who are glad you didn't die."
"Yeah?" I rub my eyes.
"Yeah." He pauses, not sure what to say. I get the impression that Alex has always been the sensitive one, Luke the goofy heartthrob, and Reggie the funny, dumb one. He's actually a lot smarter than he lets on. "I know I'm sure glad you didn't die. Then who would sass us and keep us in check? Who would have gotten Julie to rejoin the band?"
It really is all about the music. "Flynn."
I'm expendable.
"Maybe, but she wouldn't have been able to know what's going on with Luke," Reggie says. "See, I like to people watch nowadays. There isn't much else to do when it's a one-sided relationship."
"Your point is?" I ask, raising an eyebrow.
"Julie is happier and that makes Ray happier. We're practically BFF's so I can tell you that," he explains. I chuckle and he smiles. "Alex cares about you because that's a part of who he is. I care because you never made fun of my love for country music or treated me like I'm the dumb one. For a lot of guy bands people try to put labels on the members. To you, I'm just me."
"Yeah, you're undeniably the strangest, but what's not to love?" I tease.
"You're right, I am pretty awesome." He grins and straightens his leather jacket.
"I'm sorry for how I treated you the first day, calling you a womanizer," I say. "That was rude of me. You deserve better than that."
"Eh, I mean your first impression was me shaking my butt on stage then hopping down to flirt with Carrie's minions," he says indifferently. "While it did hurt a little, it was justified."
"I guess so," I reply. "I still feel bad."
"Don't."
We sit there for a few more minutes, comfortable with the silence. That's unusual for Reggie, but I like it.
"Mia and Teresa look up to you like the big sister you are. Even Blake does, no matter how macho he acts," Reggie adds. "Well, as macho as a child can be. Taylor and Daniel treat you no different from their kids."
I laugh at the macho part. "How often are you at my house?"
"I get bored," he shrugs. "It happens."
"Weirdo," I tease, giving him a playful shove.
In the next few seconds of silence, I notice he's left one person out.
"And Luke?" I ask quietly.
"Luke...he's complicated." Reggie's eyes glaze over as he drifts back to a memory. "Before we died and met you, he was a dreamer. A dreamer with a crushed heart."
I'm not sure what he means so I raise my eyebrows in confusion.
"Luke was always the one to shoot for the stars," Reggie elaborates. "Little did he know those stars would burn him."
I wince.
"He didn't let anyone get in the way," Reggie continues, "not even his parents. He said some hurtful things that he couldn't take back. But you probably guessed that from what Alex said."
I nod.
"Anyway, it haunted him and it still does," the bassist says. "But with you, he's more alive than he was towards the end of his life, ya know? Like maybe he isn't one big screw up."
I bite my lip. "That can't really be how he feels, can it?"
Luke's life isn't one big screw up.
It's vibrant, full of color, even if he isn't literally lively since he is a ghost.
"No offense, but I've known him longer," Reggie answers. "Luke isn't as confident as seems. I haven't seen him so empowered until now."
Interesting.
I lay my head on his shoulder after checking that no one's around. "Thanks Reg."
"Anytime, Lil' Mae," he puts an arm around me and I feel something new.
I belong here. I'm not a burden to the world. I'm a part of the world. I'm meant to be here. I have a purpose.
I sigh, letting the weight of that slide off like jello from a spoon, leaning into Reggie.
"I've never had a sister, but I imagine if I did she would be just like you," he whispers. "I hope she would be."
"Really?" I ask, craning my neck to read his expression.
"Duh." He's smiling.
"Good." I hear tire scraping pavement and jerk into a standing position.
"What was that for?" Reggie questions, dark eyebrows furrowing.
"I think my foster parents are here," I answer, "I'm about to get an ear full."
"Good luck," he says. "We'll send someone to check up on you later."
"Lila Mae, when you asked to have a sleepover at a friend's house, I said yes because I thought you would be responsible!" Daniel fusses, tugging a tense hand through his thick mop of hair. "Do you know what Taylor is going to say when she finds out? You're lucky Ray called me, not her."
"I know and I'm sorry," I say, "but I never lied. I slept in and that was an accident, yes. I'll make up the calculus test tomorrow, okay?"
"Your teacher said it was a very important test and without a validate excuse she has to dock you two letter grades," he explains. My jaw drops.
"Seriously?" I ask. I didn't know that.
"You can't fail math!" He sits next to me and breathes to calm himself down.
"Yikes, see ya later, 'gater," Reggie salutes me with two fingers before disappearing.
"I'm really sorry, Mr. Daniel, I promise it won't happen again," I tell him. "You've slept in before, right? Things with the band didn't go as well and we were exhausted. I'm a teenager. Am I not allowed to make mistakes?"
He searches my face before finally deciding it is the truth. "You're right. You don't have to be perfect and you're trying your best."
Yes, yes!
"And I missed class last Friday because of my passing out, meaning according to the syllabus my test is scheduled for tomorrow," I reason. "So, my grade shouldn't drop because I wasn't given ample time to study anyway, especially with me being a new student."
"Fine, I'll talk to your teacher and see if she will let you retake it for up to a 100," he agrees, "but don't think this means you could get away with this again."
"Oh, no of course not," I say.
"I won't tell Taylor or ground you as long as you promise to study tonight and do well on the test tomorrow."
I'm planning on performing tonight, but who says I can't do both?
"I promise," I tell him.
"Well, now that that's settled, we should be getting home. Let me go thank Ray for letting me know what's going on," he says, walking inside.
I'm left alone until another ghost boy interrupts my thoughts.
"Lila! Are you excited to perform?" he asks, plopping down next to me.
"I don't know how it will work out," I say. "I've barely earned Daniel's trust. I can't blow this."
"What? After all that fussing and apologizing, you're going to bail on us?" Luke stands, upset. "Hypocrite."
"Shut up!" I stand, glaring at him with crossed arms. "This is out of my control."
"He didn't ground you," Luke protests, "and we're planning on sneaking Julie out."
"Julie agreed to sneak out?" I ask, shocked. That didn't sound like the goody-two shoes I know.
"Yeah. It's really important to us. Please," he begs. "You'll be in and out before you know it."
I think over this. "Just one song?"
"'Finally Free'." He nods.
"I guess it wouldn't kill me," I say, beginning to be persuaded. "What time will you come?"
"Seven," he says, clapping me on the shoulder. "Thanks, Lila, you're the best!"
As I see the grin on his face and feel my heart flutter, I know he has a grip on me.
Dang it!
For once, Reggie might know something I don't. Something it's taken me this long to realize.
Luke likes me. Maybe even in that way.
And I think I like him too.
Oh my goodness! This story grew almost 2K reads in one day? Thanks for your support! Know that I notice each and every one of you and you are appreciated!! I write this for you. ❤
xoxo,
Lynn