I think I've found a proper groove to this life. A month has passed since Seren and I visited my family in Crystalwood. While I do still have moments of doubt and sadness, Seren has kept up with her promise. It doesn't take her long to pull my mind off of that awful encounter with my old bullies. She'll take me out, show me a good time.
One of those instances landed us in a random drive through theater that was two hours away from her apartment. After a quick look on Google for places near us and this was where we went. Now, it's like a tradition for us. We try to go every so often, especially when they play older movies from the eighties and nineties.
We've learned that shoving salty, buttery popcorn in our faces is a great way to bond for the two of us. I wouldn't change it.
Work has taught me more things too. Because Chandler has been working from home more, a lot of responsibility has been set on my shoulders. My hours are the same, but the workload during office time has grown. I've found that I've taken on a bigger role in the company as Chandler's assistant. Others may not see it as this, but I almost feel like I'm his partner rather than his puppy.
As I now stand in my apartment after a long day at work, I realize that this place isn't really my home anymore. I just about live at Seren's place now since all our time is spent together. Her place is furnished too, so of course we'd spend more time there; even if both our jobs are here and my place is closer.
My place is still bare, save for a single cheap lawn chair I bought to fill the living room. It doesn't do much other than stick out like a sore thumb. Shaking my head, I laugh to myself as I walk to my room. My clothes fall off my body in a trail, leading to the bathroom. The drains squeak when I turn the shower on.
The hot water washes away the stress from today's work day. Dropping my head, the liquid drenches my hair, causing it to fall down the side of my face along with droplets. With a deep breath, I take a moment to enjoy the silence and being alone.
It doesn't take me long to get my body clean. After a quick wash, I step out into the steam-filled bathroom. When I enter my room, Seren is sitting on my bed, her eyes glued to her phone. Her blonde hair reaches her shoulders now in a mess of waves. She wears lounge clothes; gray sweats and an oversized t-shirt that looks an awful lot like mine.
"I'll be fast," I tell her, taking long strides to my closet. "Are you getting a haircut like you wanted?"
"Nah, I'll just let it grow out. See how I like it long, and if I hate it, I'll get a chop." I imagine her shrugging while my head is shoved in my closet.
"You'll look beautiful either way," I mumble, rifling through my clothes. "Should I dress up for the club? I feel kind of weird dressing down... but I also don't have luxurious clothes."
Arms wrap around my waist and her head is shoved into my back. Alarm bells ring in my head as I drop what I'm doing to comfort my girlfriend. Turning in her arms, I stare down at her with concern. Seren is never closed off, but she's never very clingy. We cuddle and keep close, but something about this feels off.
The frown on her face and the tears in her eyes only confirm what I'm thinking.
"What happened? What's wrong?" I grip her face in a delicate hold, pulling her head back so I can stare at her head on.
Seren shakes her head. Pulling her head from my hands, she goes back to hugging me and presses her head against my chest. In my arms, she sags against me and sighs. If I wasn't holding her, I wouldn't even notice the shake of her shoulders, but I do.
Her cries go on hold. The only sign is her shaking body.
"Seren?"
"Not right now please," she whispers against me, sniffling. "I just wanna get to the club, dance this stress away, then go home and relax."
Nodding, I bend my head and kiss her hair. Something is wrong, but Seren will tell me in her own time. She's never been like this around me before. Seeing her hurt isn't what I want, but this gives me the chance to return all the comfort she's ever given me.
***
The club is busy today. From what I've seen, Saturdays are almost always prime times, but this Friday, it seems like something special is going on.
When Seren and I got here, we slipped in through the back which landed us in the private dance wing. Even back there it was busy with dancers running around and getting ready. What I can't get my mind off of is Seren's mood. Since we talked for a bit at my apartment, she's been quiet.
Whatever is going on, it's keeping her mind occupied. I only hope it's nothing that's tearing her down.
I sit in the front row, right next to the stage as Seren dances her life away. The sexy sway of her hips and each caress of her body has always been sensual and enough to get me going, but today she has the aura of a tiger. Her being works harder than I've ever seen before. This routine is new.
The men around me watch with looks of fascination and every once in a while, I catch a male adjusting himself. My stomach rolls with each vulgar phrase that falls from someone's mouth. The music fades away and all I can hear are exclamations about my girlfriend.
I would fuck her into next week.
Give me some time with her and I'll break her fucking back.
I bet those pretty plump lips would look great wrapped around my cock.
My blood boils as I continue to listen to their words and watch Seren give everyone a show. She's not just dancing for me, I'm not the only one who gets to see her intimates. Every male and female in this place has seen my Seren.
The rest of her dance leaves me angry. With crossed arms and a scowl set on my face, I sit through Seren undressing for these men. Her breasts that fit like a matching piece in my hand are exposed to them. The stomach I know as warm and soft rolls from her hip movements. Thighs that have been wrapped around my head are wrapped around the pole, telling these men she knows how to work her body. I hate this.
"Fuck me, that Ariel is really something else," a man next to me says, groaning as he watches my Seren strut off the stage.
"They know how to pick their girls." The guy next to him smirks. "Now I just wonder how much the club would charge for a night with the little mermaid. Everyone has a price, always."
I can't take any more of this. Standing, I stomp past club guests and head to where the private dance is closed off. The guard lets me through without me having to give a password. At this point, most of the workers here know that Seren and I are together. That doesn't stop their looks of disbelief, seeing me come in with her, but they know.
A man comes out of Seren's room. I watch him, recognizing this guy as the one who talked to me months ago. When he passes, his cold eyes hold my own for a long while. Shuddering, I pull myself out of whatever this is and continue to Seren's quarters.
With a knock on the door, I wait for her to open it. Instead of Seren greeting me at the door, she just calls for me to come in. Not hesitating, I take a deep breath and enter the place. It looks the same as always; rack of clothes on one side, a couch and chair in front of a pole, and a vanity for her makeup.
"How was the show?" she asks as soon as we meet. This is something she does every time I watch her. "I feel a little looser after dancing it out."
"It was different." I nod my head, shoving my hands into my pocket and looking at the ground.
"You don't sound like you enjoyed yourself today. What's wrong?" Her heels click as she walks over to me. The sounds grow closer as she does. When she sets a hand on my arm, I pull away. "Okay, what the fuck? What?"
Puffing my chest out, I find the courage to look at her. "There was an enormous crowd today."
Her eyes soften. The sight of her regarding me makes me feel guilty and shameful for catching an attitude. "Did someone say something?" she questions, crossing her arms. Right now, she's like a mama bear who's ready to take up for her cubs.
"No." I shake my head, frowning. "There were a lot of guys watching you."
"Okay? I don't understand what you're getting at, Sutton."
"I hated seeing that and hearing the disgusting things they said about you, okay? Everything that left their mouths were vulgar things about the way they'd like to have you or something about your lips being wrapped around them."
Seren narrows her eyes and uncrosses her arms. Placing her hands on her hips, she gives me a look so full of annoyance. I've never once been on the receiving end of this type of stare from her. Being on this side is scary and I can't help but feel as if I've just committed a huge crime.
"Are you telling me you're upset because a bunch of guys said some sleazy shit about me?" She tilts her head to the side, raising an eyebrow. "Me, a stripper?"
I nod my head even if it's reluctant.
"Are you being fucking serious, Sutton? This is my job, I strip for a living. We can't exactly tell the men to close their eyes when we come out to dance."
"I know that... I just hate that all those men were staring at you," I mumble, feeling foolish for bringing this up.
"Why? You knew what I did from the first moment you saw me. I even told you that I would never let a man dictate what I do with my job and my body." She glares at me head on. This is our first fight. Our first proper fight.
"I'm not saying quit—"
"Then what the hell are you saying?"
An exasperated sigh leaves me as I lift a hand to run through my hair. This isn't turning out how I thought it would. I don't even know what I was expecting.
Seren laughs, the sound lacking humor. She shakes her head and turns around to face the mirror on her vanity. "I'm only going to say this one more time, Sutton. My body is mine and just because I'm in a relationship, it doesn't mean that I'll stop doing what I love. I enjoy stripping and I won't let anyone take this away from me. If you can't handle the fact that I strip for a living, then this relationship should come to an end."
Panic hits me with full force. Those words knock the wind out of me and I can't stop myself from pressing a hand to my chest. Her stare is so hard, even if we're connecting eyes through her reflection. She doesn't falter, even as she sees me struggling to get any words out and to calm myself down.
"I don't—" Taking a deep breath, I try to speak again, but the words just don't come out.
Seren nods. The hard look falls, only to be replaced with disappointment. At last, she turns to face me and I want nothing more than to take her frown away and replace it with a smile. Walking over to me, she places a hand against my cheek.
"Maybe we should spend some time apart, Sutton." Seren sighs. It takes a moment for me to realize what she's just said.
Gasping a breath, I shake my head. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry." The words come spewing out now that everything is on the line. "You're right, I shouldn't be so angry that you're doing your job. I knew what I was getting into and you even warned me too. Please, Seren, I'm so sorry. But please don't break up with me. I love that you strip, and I love that you enjoy your job. I was being an asshole."
"Yeah, you were," she agrees and it only breaks my heart more. "These feelings came from somewhere and I don't think you fully mean what you just said about loving what I do. If you did, this wouldn't be a problem in the first place. I don't want to be with someone who's always going to question me and look down on what I do."
"I won't." My voice comes out high and pleading, resembling a child who's getting his favorite toy taken from him. "Please, Seren, I'll never question you again."
She only shakes her head. "A break, Sutton. I think you need to figure out if this is really what you want. I'm ready to be with you, no questions asked. But are you able to overlook this place, my job?"
When I say nothing, she sighs and nods. "Please take some time to think about this, okay? For me, please."
The least I can do is agree to do this. No matter how hard I want to refuse and beg her to forgive me, I nod my head and make my way out of her room. Nothing else is said, no hugs are given, and no kisses are made.