It was now 7:45pm and Mimi had arrived to her mother's house in North Long Beach, near Lakewood. She sat in her car trembling and hoping that her mother would be home when she'd get to the door. Frightened, she stayed in her car for a couple of more minutes. During those couple of minutes she meditated and took an few sips of water. She was receiving an influx of incoming calls, a few from Brenda, Jessica, Christian, Jesse and Stephanie G.
Just when she thoughts the calls had finally stopped she receives an incoming call from one of her closest friends, Danny. They both met at the same place of work. Just like her friendship with the rest of her coworkers, they developed a strong friendship. Almost like siblings only Mimi had common sense and Danny being unreasonable at times.
She slides the "End call" and rest her head on the driver's seat. He calls again and she hangs up. He calls her a third time. It was the last straw. She turns off her phone and shoves it in her purse.
Her head was filled with the nightmare she had last night and the flashback ,she had just thirty minutes ago, and the one from last night's party. It was knowing at her like a parasite. The more she thought about them the more she felt too scared to tell her mother.
Her mother had raised her and her younger sister alone, at the age of 23, after her father had left her to move his other family across the state. Their divorced was finalized just two months later. Her mother, Leila, had struggled raising both her children alone after the death of her mother. She relocated to NYC where she had met her second husband, a Moroccan native of Middle Eastern descent. The two got married just moths after dating and lived in several parts of Brooklyn. Their marriage was very rocky, with her mother being the bread winner of the household and her step father, with his green card, being the housewife and struggling to find a job.
Throughout the years together, however, there was something strange. Every night, Mimi would see strange and frightening monsters. It was normal for kids to fear monster living under their beds or see strange shadows in the dark but these monster were shaped like humans. When Mimi was four, she was sleeping saw a shadow appear on the wall in front of her. The shadow had gotten bigger and its head and legs elongated as it approached. She screamed. The shadow had disappeared instantly and her mother and stepdad came rushing in to check on her. She cried for quite some time but had a hard time explaining what she had saw. Her throat and lungs felt like they were closed shut. Every morning she'd wake up paralyzed and unable to speak. Her mother would often move her to help get her out of it. Nights and mornings like those had continued until she turned seven. Her mother was always welcoming her to talk to her about anything that bothered but all she'd just say is "nothing" or "I just need some time alone to think"
Five years later, they had separated, after a dispute between the two. Mimi's mother settled into a shelter for women and then permanently settled into an apartment in the projects in the Bronx. Her mother's and step father's divorced was finalized two years later. The small family spent the rest of their lives there but didn't love their living conditions or the environment. All her mother wanted was to look and feel loved, but didn't expect to be used by her two former husbands. Mimi's teen years were not so pleasant either.
She was shy, quiet but adored by teachers and a few classmates throughout middle school and high school. But she was silly and herself in the comfort of her own home. Like most high schoolers, she was encouraged to talk to guidance counselors about their educational plans and preparations for college. She took her education seriously. Mimi had interest in baking and the culinary arts and applied to as many colleges possible. Mimi, however, had growing problems that she herself could not understand.
Mimi had became distant and quieter but found solace with the discovery of Kpop and other music. At the age of sixteen, her mother had suggested she'd see a therapist. The last person she had trusted with, professionally, was was her speech therapist when she was four. Her speech therapist, Susan, was the closest thing to a best friend she could have, before she left to her new job. Before she left, Susan gave Mimi a handmade book with pictures of her and peers. In memory of Susan, Mimi still keeps the handmade book in hopes to finally see her again.
Her therapy sessions, during her junior year of high school, would go quite well but there was something that Mimi was too afraid to tell and didn't really know how. She'd miss a couple of sessions only because of fear of missing school or afraid to reveal what really lied beneath her. Since then Mimi had been avoiding seeking professional help.
Once calm and finally collected she got out of her car, locked it and head to the door. She rang the doorbell and waited. Mimi jumps when she hears something rustling in the bushes. She rings the doorbell again and the rustling continues. Mimi slowly steps back and reaches for her pepper spray in her purse. Her thumb presses on the button ready to press when two bushes tails appear. Two brown and white colored cats, one small and one slightly fatter, appear from the bushes. Their tails sway and meow with keen and friendly interests.
She's relieved and kneels down to pet them. The door swings open and her mother appears.
"Oh Mima I'm so sorry! I didn't hear the door"
Mima was family nickname given by her sister. Mimi was a nickname given to her by one of her close friends in middle school. Her sister had a hard time pronouncing her real name as a toddler so she magically came up with Mima. Mima is now a nickname that her close friends can use, if permitted.
Mimi straightens herself and turns around "I rang the doorbell twice, mom and you still couldn't hear it?" She chuckles. She gives her mom a warm and loving hug.
Her mom pecks a small kiss on her cheek "You know I'm getting old so my hearing is not as good" She lets go and steps into the house. "Come in, I made enchiladas and rice and beans tonight" She signals the two cats to come inside the house with the two cans of tuna in her hands.
Mimi follows. She closes and locks the door behind her "Is it Mexican theme night, tonight mom?" She laughs. One of the cats rubs its cheeks against Mimi's legs "Are these your cats mom?"
Her mom waddles with each step "I promised the neighbors I'd make them enchiladas. Yeah they are. One of the neighbors decided to give them away so I decided to adopt them. They like to go outside at night. They're like my guards"
"What happened to Romeo? I was wondering why I didn't hear him bark when I rang the doorbell" They both enter the kitchen.
Her mother goes to the oven to check on the enchiladas. She grunts while taking out two large pans of enchiladas "He's upstairs with a cone on his head right now" She sets them on the counter and huffs "He just had surgery. They had to remove a tumor from his stomach. Now he's quiet because he's healing and can't move"
"Aww I'll go upstairs and check on him later then" Mimi takes a seat at the large porcelain island counter.
She pours Mimi a cup of ice cold water "You want me to fix you a plate?"
Mimi shakes her head "No, I had two PB&J's and a large cup of fruit punch. I'm ok"
Leila smiles. "I'll make you a plate for you to take home then" She walks over to the stove to check on the rice "You sister came by to visit yesterday but wasn't expecting to see you tonight, with your busy schedule and all. How's work and everything going?"
Mimi sighs and plops her chin on her arm that was resting on the counter "Busy. Too busy for my liking"
Leila opens the top to the pot. A wave of steam blew on her face, fogging up her glasses. She waves the steam away. "Well you are working towards owning a bakery and saving money to move to South Korea. What about you're husband? How's he doing? I didn't get a chance to say happy birthday to him"
"He's busy too" She deadpans.
"Oh, I'm sorry that you're both busy. Your birthday is coming up soon!" Her mother runs over and kisses her tenderly on the head.
"I didn't request my birthday off" She murmurs.
"What? Why?"
"Because we have sixty twelve dozen cupcake orders, and four orders of brownies that day. And two of my other supervisors had requested that day off" She lied.
"Aww that means we can't celebrate your birthday!"
Mimi wraps her arms around her mother, pulling her in for a warm comforting hug "It's ok. I have plenty more birthdays. It's just another day"
"I gave birth to you so you know you and your sister's birthdays are always going to be special to me"
"I know mom" Mimi smiles tenderly. "Mom, can I ask you something"
Leila takes a seat next to her "You know I've always told you that you can tell me anything"
Mimi sighs and folds her hands together "Mom, was there ever something wrong with me?"
Leila is taken back by her question "No. You were always quiet and had a hard time speaking. You never spoke a lot as a kid but you grew out of it. But no, why do you ask?"
"I just always felt like there's something wrong with me. Those nights, when I was little, I'd scream because I was seeing things that weren't there. I stopped seeing them but now they're starting to come back."
"Are you getting enough sleep? It could be lack of sleep that's making you see things that aren't there."
Mimi takes a sip of water. "It could be. I just can't seem to get to sleep. I'm having these nightmares that...seem so real...like they're actually happening. I had a flashback of someone... just before coming here. And then last night I had a flashback and accidentally pushed Junji against the wall at his parents house and I was just so sh-"
"Wait. I thought you said he was busy." Her mother interrupted.
Mimi chokes. "Uh umm he was b-but um he had to uh"
Leila cocks her head to the side and places both her hands on her hips "Mima, what is it that you're not telling me? Did you two get into a fight?"
"N-not really. W-we sort of did b-"
"Oh Mima! Running away from an argument is not going to solve anything! You two better work things out. You two can't be running away from arguments, especially when you have kids"
Initially that was the reason for the small argument, but there was more than that that she couldn't tell.
"Mima as much as I love you with all my heart, you're a grown woman and I can't be there to solve your marital problems. And as for those nightmares and flashbacks you're having I'd really suggest you see professional help. I tried to get you the help you needed when you were a teenager but you just skipped sessions. I want you to feel comfortable telling me what's wrong so I can be there to help you"
To help you. Those were the three words that Junji had said to her when she denied. They were becoming her least favorite words.
"Ok mom. I'll take your advice." She gets out of her seat and plants a gentle kiss on her moms cheek. "I better get going then. I'll see you when I can"
Leila reaches over and grabs a plate wrapped heavily in foil and gives it to her "Oh here's your plate!"
"Oh thanks mom. I'll have it for lunch at work tomorrow" She gives her mom one last tight hug before heading to the door.
Two of the cats had followed her to the door. Mimi leaves the house, with the cats following behind her. While walking to her car she reaches into her purse to turn on her phone. She had received 15 missed calls from Junji and several others, from about an hour ago, and her phone was at 25 percent. She could sense already sense that he was still out there looking for her.
The cats leave as soon as Mimi gets into her car and run back to her mother's door. Mimi turns on the engine, plugs her phone in the car's charger holds the steering wheel tightly. After a few seconds of collecting herself, she begins the drive to her house.
***
After bustling through heavy traffic, she arrives to the house at 10:00pm. Mimi grabs that plate of food her made made for her, closes the car door, locks it and strides her way to the door. She opens the door and steps in and is met with the bright light from the living room. She turns her head to see Junji, sobbing with his hands cup to his face.
Mimi's heart drops seeing him in such a fragile state. She sets the plate down on the coffee table on the side of her.
"You're still up?" She stutters.
Junji pops his head up. "Mimi, holy shit!" He jumps out of his seat, runs towards her and engulfs her with a tight embrace. "Mimi, I'm so glad you're ok!"
"I'm ok babe."
"I kept calling you but I figured you really needed your space to clear your head so I told everyone to stop calling"
"I'm fine for now, Junji and thanks for giving me my space. I'll get back to everyone as soon as I can"
The two sperate from their hug and Junji takes her hand and guides her to the couch to sit.
"Mimi you know I love you and I'd do anything to make you happy but there are things that I still want you to be honest with me about"
Mimi's hands begins to tense up a bit and bites her lower lip "I know you do but it's...it's really hard to open up to something that I can't understand. The constant nightmares are making me tired and I'm at a point where I just don't know what to do. I decided to make a phone call tomorrow morning to see about seeing a therapist"
"I think that's the best idea. And I'll be there every step of the way. I want to help you, but you have to let me. Can you do that?"
Mimi is hesitant at first but agrees.
"I don't want you sleeping in the livingroom tonight. I want you to sleep in the bed with me"
"Wait b-"
"Please Mimi. At least try...Just this once."
Mimi pouts her lips slightly "But you have to wake up at three and I don't want to risk keeping you up if I have a nightmare"
"Doesn't matter if I get two hours of sleep. As long as I get to hold you and comfort you and be there for you"
The thought of sharing a bed with her husband, in such a long time, scared her but she knew it would do her greatly and it would be the first step she's ever made. And all it took was those were the words that convinced her.