Tristan
He was just stood there. Frozen. Looking down at his half opened bag, like he's thinking of a thousand things to say to me. Some of which I do deserve.
"I didn't just invite you over for your saftey. I done it for mine too"
His expression was confused, scrunched up brows, squinted eyes and his top lip perked up. I would by lying if I said that wasn't cute.
"You gave me an opportunity, Brad. I've been too worried to take it. But I think I'm ready"
"Is that before or after you kick me out?"
"I'm not kicking you out"
"Well, I'm leaving"
"Please don't"
"Why? I'll make sure to get murdered on the way it might make us both feel better then!"
I grabbed his shoulder to turn him around and face me but he just squeezed his eyes shut and tensed his whole body up. After a few seconds he opened one eye and exhaled.
"Sorry"
His eyes went back down to the floor.
I really need him to look at me. Think, Tristan, think.
"I got your phone if you want to spend some time alone"
"What's the time?"
I clicked his home button and ended up unlocking the phone onto a chat conversation.
Bradley- I'll wave as you go past then aha
Connor- How romantic xx
Bradley- always for you baby xx
Connor- I love you xx
Bradley- I love you too xx
Oh. Oh okay...
"Um... it's 16.02. I'm gonna just- I don't feel too good... I'll uh I'll be right back"
I slid his phone into my pocket and went to the bathroom, locking myself in.
I scrolled far up their conversation.
Connor- what a joke right. Lost a game to a camper. Their gun sucked ass.
Bradley- you should get better aim then.
Connor- I'll aim my hand to your ass if you don't shut up
Bradley- you should teach Nate that
Connor- no. I dont think our date went good. I'll update you tomorrow.
Bradley- okay.
Connor- hows you and tristans work coming along
Bradley- i want to kill myself but yanno. Its really hard to work with him he never stops judging me, he always wrecks my confidence- self esteem included BY THE WAYYY.
And just everything i do is wrong like dude... im trying
Connor- at least he hasnt tried anything like shredding your work up.
Bradley- i have no work anyway. I wrote a little verse but hes just gonna push it aside and say "oh your so shit blah blah blah"
Like suck my dick tris.
Connor- I'm sure you wouldnt mind him sucking your dick?
Bradley- goodnight connor x
Connor- LMAO. Goodnight x
14.48 PM
Connor- I just got on my bus, I can see you down the road
Bradley- I'll wave as you go past then aha
Connor- How romantic xx
Bradley- always for you baby xx
Connor- I love you xx
Bradley- I love you too xx
My heart is pounding, my chest feels so tight like I could throw up. Oh my god am I sick? Am I ... feeling sad? Oh, Bradley Simpson, what are you doing to me?
I heard 3 knocks on the door.
"Tris... are you okay. Have you been sick?"
"I'm fine. Just needed to cool down."
"Okay. Do you want me to get you a drink?"
"I'm good, thanks"
Bradley is one of the loudest people I know so I heard him walk away and shut my bedroom door. I stood up and washed my hands and splashed my face with cold water, letting out a big sigh.
I walked back into my room and Brad was lying down above the covers on my bed. I didn't want to say anything about it. I just let him.
Sitting down next to him, I realised his head was by my thighs. I looked down at him and he was clearly tired. His eyes were getting weaker and struggled to stay open. The corner of my lips curved into a smile as I watched him collapse next to me.
I got my phone from my pocket and put his on my bedside table. There was nothing I could do but go on my phone, the TV would wake him so... Instagram and Facebook it is.
-------------------------
I opened my eyes and looked to my left to see the brunette with his arm over my legs and his head resting on my thigh as a pillow. I must have drifted off to sleep too because my phone was on the floor and my hand was in his hair, tangled in the soft curls.
"Brad"
I whisper. Oh yeah a sleeping person is definitely going to hear that.
"Brad"
I say in my normal voice. Nothing. I move my hand from his hair and try to gently lift his arm from off my legs. With success, I was able to slowly reach down and grab my phone just by my fingertips. Perks of being a drummer, nothing is too heavy on your fingers.
18.23 PM
Oh god that was over an hour. We must have been comfortable.
"Brad"
I gently shook his body then tapped his shoulder.
"Mmh"
"Hey"
"Mmmh"
I smiled.
"I'm going to start cooking. Do you want to stay here?"
"Wanna stay with you"
"Um....okay sure. Well I'll meet you downstairs"
Bradley
I felt Tristan leave the bed and it suddenly got so cold and my eyes were still trying to close. 5 more minutes.
"Why do you always yell at me?"
"Why do you never listen?"
"Okay so what I forgot. Big deal!"
"You just don't get it"
"I don't get you! You told me to forget about it"
"I told you to forget about the other thing, not this!"
"I'm sorry"
"You're always saying so much shit. You're always asking questions, always saying sorry. How about you mean some of that shit"
"I do mean it!"
"Bullshit"
"Okay then. You tell me why you're such a prick to me and then 5 minutes later you're an angel to me. Or did we forget that I'm not the only bad person here?"
"I didn't call you a bad person"
"That's not the point. Answer my annoying questions. "
"No"
"Why"
"I don't have to"
"Yes you do, just how you make me do it"
"I don't"
"Do"
"I don't want to"
"Why"
"Because"
"Then fucking show me what you're aftaid of! Cuz you keep blaming yourself for it"
"You want me to show you?"
"Yes. Do it"
For a moment we stopped arguing and just looked at each other.
"Fine"
He said calmly and took a step closer to me. He leaned his face in and kissed me on my cheek.
"Brad?"
"You love me?"
"Brad........ dude"
"Huh, what?"
"You fell asleep again"
I opened my eyes again and saw him standing on my side of the bed.
"I don't remember falling back to sleep, sorry"
"It's fine. Don't get too much sleep or you won't sleep tonight."
"Will you want to stay up with me?"
"Maybe"
My heart. My smile.
"So uh... what's for dinner?"
"Chicken breast with a mushroom and cream sauce with red wine. Side of salad and chips"
"Am I in a restaurant? You sound so posh"
"Do I?"
"Yeah"
We both laughed. It was a lovely moment. A few seconds where we both shared a joke. I could see him smile with full intention of doing it. A moment where he didn't fake how he felt, what he was feeling. He was adorable.
"Tris?"
"Yeah?"
"Sit down next to me"
I waited for him to go round the other side and climb next to me.
He looked at me, a little nervous.
"Tristan... I don't know how to ask this and it's completely fine if you freak out over it."
"Okay"
"I just want to know for sure"
"Okay"
"And I can see we're getting on better. I don't want it to stop"
"Okay"
"But can I ask this?"
"Yeah"
"What did you mean when you said sometimes you want me close and sometimes you want me to fuck off? Do you wish you seen more of me?"