friday ; 2:00 PM
loud.
the hallways were always so crowded at the end of the day. friends grouped up at lockers discussing Friday night plans.
and me?
I was going to spend my friday on my leather living room couch and a box of chinese food.
claudia was planning on being with calum tonight, leaving me alone with no plans.
I stood at my locker, shuffling some books around. I was taking my time, twirling a strand of hair around my finger.
there really was no rush since I was coming home to nothing but a loud family.
suddenly I leaned down to grab a book that laid on the bottom of my locker.,
my school uniform skirt going up a little higher than usual, queuing one friendly ashton irwin.
"hey princess." his breath scattering down my neck.
I swallowed harshly before turning around to face the dark boy.
I leaned up against my locker, his legs tangling between mine, his arm leaned up against the locker.
he made sure I wasn't going anywhere.
his school uniform was unbuttoned, his tie became untied, revealing his toned collarbones.
I gazed up into his light eyes, "ashton." i seemed to almost whisper.
he eyed me up and down, "jade, jade, jade." he hummed.
there was something about ashton that whatever he did was so incredibly hot. he didn't even have to try.
he was dark and I was the light.
he made me feel weak and a lump inside my throat while I spoke.
"so tell me, " he pushed his curly hair out of his eyes, "what is a girl like you doing on this friday night?"
this was all so new to me.
it took ashton four years to finally notice me. all it took was showing up at one west brooke party.
and I was all his.
claudia used to always make fun of me for being so innocent for him. I would bend over backwards just for him to even look my way.
but now that I had his attention it was all so over whelming.
I bit down on my lower lip, still twirling that piece of hair, "whatever you're doing." I tried my best to sound cool, this was ashton irwin I was talking to.
he smirked in satisfaction, "very persistent, I like it."
I shrugged a shoulder at him, shaking off the compliment as if it was no big deal.
"how would you like coming over to mine later tonight?"
I could not believe what I just heard.
just me and ashton.
"alone?" I made sure.
he let out a deep laugh, "if that's what you want, baby girl."
ashton tended to speak very freely. he had no filter and said whatever he felt. this usually ended up giving girls kinky nicknames.
I felt my heart thump in my chest as i nervously tried to think of a correct response.,
"I-I," I gazed around a passing group in the hallway, catching eyes with Olivia who eyed the two of us up and down, "I don't know."
ashton glanced over his shoulder to see what I was staring at. Olivia and him made eye contact as she gave him one quick nod of the head.
and then he turned back to face me, full attention on me, just the two of us.
"actually," he gave his lower lip a tug, "a few others will be there too, why don't you invite one of your pretty friends to come along, yeah?"
and I knew exactly what this meant.
I overheard his conversation with Olivia in chemistry earlier in the week, and I knew they wanted to be together. and I knew what I needed to do.
I innocently smiled at him, "alright."
his eyes trailed down my body once more before meeting me back in my eyes, "don't be late, Jade."
and I watched as he used his strength to push himself off the lockers and back away into the hallway.
he was so mysterious and captivating. he was so bad and I knew I couldn't play with him. he had one intention and one intention only. and I knew that he wanted the same thing with Olivia.
I let out a huff of air and stood up a bit more straight. I spun around and began finishing getting my things together.
I knew that tonight would be something,
different.
-
9:52 PM;
"jade, I feel out of place." a grumpy luke trailed behind me as we began walking up to the house.
it was late, but the night just began. the house was beaming, and when ashton said only a few people would be there, he meant there would be way more than a few.
it was party and it was in full swing.
and it was olivas and ashtons plan all along.
I gazed behind me as luke tried to catch up with my pace, "this isn't your first party, luke." I chuckled slightly.
"yes I know, but I don't have olivia with me." he crossed his lanky arms over his chest and towered over me as we stood at the door.
I didn't mention to him that olivia actually was going to be there. I had just told luke that there was a party and I didn't want to go alone. and of course he wanted to be with me, he had told me earlier that he didn't want ashton to take advantage of me.
the door was pushed open and we entered the crowded house together. luke seemed to almost cling to me as I guided us towards the the center of the crowd.
there was a keg placed in the kitchen where the two of us began to help ourselves.
luke gazed down at his cup, "this could be laced, jade." he seriously did not trust ashton, but who could blame the boy.
without hesitation I brought the cup to my lips and downed half the alcohol in one sip.
luke gave me a look with wide eyes and a tilted head.
"it's been a rough week." I said with a shrug and watched as he took weak sips of his own.
lukes eyes scanned around the room, taking in the people around him. to be completely honest they all probably knew who he was since he was dating olivia.
"jade." luke shouted over the music.
I gave him a glance to insure that I was listening to him.
"please don't get too drunk tonight," he searched my eyes for some sympathy, "I don't want to spend my night taking care of you." he teased.
I stepped closer to him and placed my hand on his chest, "I'll be fine." and then I gave him a little pat.
luke looked concerned.
I could tell that even if I did end up getting trashed, he would help me regardless. that's just who he was.
I knew little about this boy for only knowing him for a short period of time, but he was selfless.
he put others happiness before his own. he was a good boy. he wasn't my boy.
"sooo," luke rocked back and forth on his tip toes, scoping out the scene, "what do you wanna do?"
I brought my cup to my lips, taking in some of the cheap vodka chased with sprite. I never liked vodka. I always thought it was too bitter for my taste, yet I always found myself coming back to it.
"let's walk." and without another thought or word I grasped onto his hand and began dragging the six foot something boy.
his hand enclosed onto mine. his hands are huge and made mine feel locked up and safe.
i looked like a little girl pulling around her parents to get to the ice cream truck. he was so tall standing over me and I felt so innocent.
"jade, jade," luke groaned from behind me, "jade look at me." he called behind.
I stopped walking and spun myself around to look at him. he had a blank expression on his face, he was obviously annoyed.
"don't leave me." he spoke in a hush tone, almost impossible to hear over the music.
I hopelessly took in his words, admiring it all.
I looked down at our connected hands and then back into his petty blue eyes, "im right here."
he shook his head at me, "I don't want to be alone tonight."
I tilted my head at the boy, unable to read his words.
"you have me, luke." I swallowed harshly, not breaking our gaze once.
and I knew what he meant.
he wasn't himself lately. the last party he was at I left him alone, he woke up alone. he needed someone. he needed something to forget it all. I understood.
and with that he gave my hand a gentle squeeze, allowing me to weave our way through the crowded room.
we found ourselves outside now. we took the backdoor outside, where a lot of guests ran around in the yard with sparklers and teens jumping into the pool with only their underwear.
it was a nice night out. the moon hung low and there was a slight warm breeze.
we stood side by side on the balcony, a string of lights above us.
"you know, jade." luke brought his drink to his lips and harshly swallowed.
I held my eyes captive on the tall boy, waiting for him to continue.
"when I got your call asking me if I wanted to come tonight, I've got to say I wasn't upset." he shamefully admitted and chuckled at himself.
a smirk creased on my lips, "and why is that?"
he shrugged his broad shoulders, "I would have just sat at home, watching old reruns of how I met your mother."
"I needed someone to go with and well you're my guy." I simply spoke, leaning up against the railing.
luke rested his arms against the stone as well, "partners in crime." he playfully joked around.
I quickly rolled my eyes, "if you want to put it that way." I giggled slightly and gazed down at my half empty drink.
silence came between us, typical.
but it seemed to be nice this time. I liked having him by my side. we stood side by side just enjoying each others company, listening to the thumping music from inside and the loud crickets.
it was so normal, we were getting used to each other.
"look at the moon." luke bluntly spoke.
I gave him a glance and then looked upwards at the moon. it was full and reflected in my eyes.
I stuck up my finger in the air with one thumb out. I lined my hand up with the moon and squinted one eye to connect the two.
"calum told me the moon is the same size to anyone in the whole wide world who is looking at it in this moment." he spoke softly, admiring how tiny it seemed against his thumb.
I felt luke tear his gaze away from the moon and eyes on me.
"im the one who told calum that." i giggled slightly, making me happy that calum told him.
my hand dropped to my side and I met eyes with him. we stood there just taking each other in, not a word.
I swallowed deeply, "it's a nice saying."
"in australia I would bike everywhere, I used to come home so late and would peddle on dark roads, but I remember the big moon seemed to almost guide me home." luke smiled, remembering his home.
I couldn't help but smile at how happy this made him.
he ran a hand through his big messy hair, "ive kissed so many girls under the moon, it's like it knows all my secrets." he chuckled at himself, sounding pathetic.
I bit down on my lower lip, watching his cheeks curled and his dimples indented his cheeks. his smile peaking, his little spot on the middle of his front tooth.
"I hope you haven't kissed too many girls, luke." I teased him slightly.
he shook his head from stopping the laughter, "only the ones who mean something, jade, only the ones who mean something." he repeated himself.
"oh what lucky girls." I said playfully pretending to act foolish.
he chuckled at me, "and guess what?"
"huh?"
"I've captured at least twenty on polaroid." he chuckled into the palm of his hand, placing the other hand on top to stop squeaking like a little girl.
I rolled my eyes at the boy with a scoff, "and they agree to kiss you with a camera in their face?"
luke shot his hands up in surrender, "I mean hey, jade they can't resist. they just come to me."
"oh im so sure of that." i said between groups of laughter.
he darted his eyes at me, "you'd do the same!"
"i-," I stopped myself to think, "I wouldn't kiss-." I then completely stopped myself from continuing, unknowing how to phrase my thoughts.,
"would you kiss me?"
my eyes trailed up at him, his eyes in mine. the light from the moon lighting up half of his face.
I swallowed, still unsure of how to answer his question. he narrowed his eyes at me, patiently waiting for a response.
I mean, its luke.
the boy with a tiny upper lip and plump bottom lip. as well as that dumb black lip ring teasing me on the corner of his mouth. as he spoke his lips moved slow and I couldn't help but stare. luke was luke.
luke wasnt, he wasn't kissable. he is luke. the boy from the record shop.
what a weird question to ask.
I opened my mouth to answer, the words trailing on my tongue.
and suddenly,
"jade?" my name was called from a low voice, coming from behind us.
I gently closed my mouth, swallowing my words, spinning around slightly as well as luke.
and then my heart stopped.
"ashton." I said in a hush tone, watching as he slowly approached me.
from the corner of my eye I watched as luke backed away.
"I've been looking everywhere for you." he placed two hands on both of my upper arms, latching our bodies together.
I met eyes with him, feeling my heart drop to my stomach once again. he was so incredible up close, he was everything I've always wanted since freshman year. and he was finally all mine.
"I-I've been waiting for you." these words seemed to escape my mouth without reasoning.
a famous smirk came across his rugged face as his face became closer to mine, his lips placing tiny kisses on my jawline.
my eyes slowly trailed over to luke who was beginning to slip away within the crowd, but he was still in sight of us. he began fixing himself another drink.
the kisses became more intense as ashton went harder and became more rough. I placed my hands on his chest, gently gripping onto his ripped shirt.
"you're too good." he mumbled under his breath, speaking so innocently to me. he knew exactly how I was.
and with that his lips were pressed against mine. his lips were traced with alcohol, sloppily moving against mine.
he tasted like candy and whisky, he knew what he was doing and he was doing it so well.
my eyes slowly fluttered open as he pulled away and connected his lips to the crook of my neck.
I let out a soft cry, "ashton, we can't-"
he brought a finger to my lips, hushing my quiet, "we can go somewhere." he mumbled to me, continuing leaving trails getting farther and farther down.
luke took one look at us and he was off. he drifted into the crowd of people and I lost sight of him. I left him.
I couldn't fight this.
this was ashton. it has always been him. it was him since the first day of freshman year as sixteen year old me watched as he went on a jog in gym class. I wanted him, and I had him all to myself. there was just no way I could fight this off.
my head nodded, his lips still nibbling and chaffing onto my neck, I agreed with him.
he backed away from me, pulling me in front of him with force. he allowed me to lead the way to the room. we entered the house, his hands both placed on my hips.
he began whispering in my ear as we walked through the loud group of people, "you are all mine."
I swallowed harshly and found myself at the bottom the long stairwell that brought back memories of the last party.
I connected my hand with his large hand, guiding him up the steps, having no idea what I was getting myself into.
the hallway was darkly lit, the lights dimmed down low. and I knew exactly what room he wanted me in,
the room at the end of the hall.
suddenly his two hands found their way back down to my hips, forcefully spinning myself around and pinning me up against the hallway wall.
he used his hands to bring my own hands over my head and in his grasp. we weren't even in the room yet.
his lips were brought back onto my lips, tugging aggressively at my lower lip.
there was no one else in the hallway, it was just us two. we were making a lot of noise surprisingly.
he slowly let me out of his grip so that I was now standing on my own two feet. he wrapped his arm around my waist, beginning to guide me down the rest of the hallway.
we reached the door at the very end of the hall and ashton began to fumble around with the down knob.
it was locked.
"ashton?" a voice called behind us at the end of the hall, which also brought back some memories.
my heart felt as if was going to stop beating any second. I was going to get caught practically fucking ashton in the hallway.
I held my breath and spun around as well as ashton to find a shadow of someone.
ashton squinted his eyes, pushing his messy hair out of his eyes.
and she approached us,
olivia.
she had make up smeared all down her face, a bottle of opened whine in her hands. she looked like a trashy mess.
"fuck." ashton mumbled under his breath, gripping hold of my hand.
he suddenly pulled me behind him so that he could face olivia himself.
the two looked at each other in the darkness, ashton and i breathing heavily from the build up.
"what in the hell do you think you're doing?" she raised her voice slightly, approaching him so that they were extremely close.
he let out a breath of air, eyeing her up and down, "olivia, what are you doing?" he harshly spoke to her.
"what do you mean by that?" she spoke with such attitude.
"oh please," Ashton let out a loud scoff, "you know exactly what I mean. I waited for you. I wanted you. in fact I needed you. but you chose him."
and by him, he meant luke. olivia chose luke. and I didn't know anything about what this meant or what was happening.
olivia tutted, "no ashton," she swallowed harshly trying to regain her balance, "I want you. you're all I want."
my mouth slowly became agape as I heard these words slip through her mouth. she was obviously drunk so whatever she said she meant. she didn't want luke, she didn't need him.
"you have to leave the fucking boy then." he threw his hands up in the air in frustration.
she swallowed, "I- I can't do that."
ashton began to laugh at her, sounding so pathetic, "then what makes you think I'm going to chase after you?"
olivia ran a hand through her hair, "you have to understand where I'm coming from, ashton."
but she was so wrong. cheating on luke was awful. she got herself stuck in a terrible place and she's just digging her grave really.
"olivia," ashton placed a hand on her hip, "you can't be mine when you have him."
"that hasn't stopped you before!" she shot back at him, crashing into his chest.
I stood behind them quiet. there was a couple times I wanted to barge in and state my opinion, but I knew things would be worse. I didn't even know if olivia knew it was me behind ashton.
"like you said, he's a nice boy he's a good boy, you can have him all to yourself." ashton tried to explain to her but he slurred eon his drunk words.
she looked up at ashton with the blink of the eyes and then moved her gaze over to me. she gave me a stare down, sucking down on her bottom lip.
she recognized me.
"you've got to be kidding me." she practically tossed ashton to the side.
she was now facing me, arms crossed over her chest.
"ashton, we didn't know this girl existed until this month, this- this doesn't make sense." olivia spoke not breaking harsh eye contact with me once.
"leave her out of this, olivia." ashton mumbled under his breath.
olivia spun around quickly to face ashton, "leave her out of this? for christ sake she is in the middle of this all." and she turned back around to look at me.
I remained quiet, my back against the door.
"what do you want from us, jade?" she got very close to my face, as if I couldn't hear.
I gazed over at ashton who glared at her and then back at olivia.
"i want you to leave luke alone." i coldly responded, getting a weird look from ashton.
ashton obviously was confused as to why I spoke lukes name. for all he knew, I didn't even know luke existed. by me saying this it probably ruined all that we had going.
olivia scoffed, "do you want him, jade?"
and then it all hit me.
I didn't know what I wanted. luke has always been out of the question. he's just a boy who I met a month and a half ago. yet all my thoughts have been about him. all I've wanted to do since I've met him was protect him. I wanted him to be happy, I didn't want him to myself. but I did like being the reason to make him happy.
I eyed ashton from the corner of my eye, him hesitantly waiting for my reply.
"I want," I swallowed trying to collect my thoughts, "I want him to be happy." I answered honestly.
Olivia gazed at ashton and then back at me, "you can have him."
these words hit me cold. she so freely gave him up.
ashton approached the two of us, "is he what you want, jade?"
I narrowed my eyes at ashton, still unsure about that question. that thought has never came to mind. I never imagined myself with luke.
I felt both eyes on me, sending chills up my spin and my head to spin from the alcohol. the room felt burning and the walls were closing in.
"I need to get out of here." I stumbled on my words.
and then I pushed past the two, practically sprinting down the hallway. I heard ashton call my name, but not making an effort to chase after me.
I reached the long staircase and skidded down each step, my hair falling into my face.
all I wanted right now was to find luke.
when I reached the bottom of the steps, I had to push past so many crowds of people. they all stared at the look of panic on my face. everything was so blurry, everywhere I turned people looked the same.
the blaring music causing my ears to throb. I stopped in my tracks in the middle of the room and began to look around.
suddenly a not-so friendly face passed me by. without hesitation I grabbed hold of the boys arm, pulling him close to me.
michael clifford.
his worried eyes eyed me up and down. but as soon as he recognized that it was me, a smirk plastered his face.
"hey baby." he licked his lips.
"michael," I let out a breath of air, "I need your help." I never thought I would be asking him that.
he raised an eyebrow, "oh you do?"
"where's luke." I jumped right into the question.
his face faded, obviously disappointed in my words. his eyes trailed across the room, beginning to think about where he was.
his eyes fell back on me, "the last I saw him he was getting drunk by himself at the pool."
and that was where I left him last.
I let my grip fall off of michaels arm and without another word I turned away from him and made my way to the back of the house. I took the same way luke and I had originally went when we went outside.
the backyard was still completely crowded and trashed. I stood on the balcony, overlooking it all. I ran over to the ledge, my eyes trailing across the pool.
and there he sat.
his knees curled up to his chest, bottles surrounded his body. he just sat there with his headphones stuffed into his ears, gazing up in the sky.
what a party animal.
I pushed myself away from the ledge and began running down the long steps that led to the pool. I ran past many drunk faces to finally reach him, towering over his body.
I stood quiet for some time, just the sound of my puffing breath.
his eyes trailed from the sky then met with mine. he had a blank expression plastered across his face. he slowly lifted one hand up to his earphones and ripped one out, ready to hear me talk.
"luke." I breathed out, falling to my knees to get on eye level with him.
he licked his lips, raising an eyebrow at waiting for me to carry on.
"luke," I repeated grabbing hold of his hand, "let's get out of here."
he looked down at our connected hands and then back at me, "jade." and that's all he said.
I looked at him with empty eyes, waiting on edge for him to continue.
"yes luke."
"you came back." his soppy drunk voice slurred over these words.
a gentle smile creased on my face as I pulled myself closer to him, giving his hand a squeeze.
"yes, I told you I wouldn't leave you." I looked into his sweet eyes.
he was so innocent when he was drunk and vulnerable. he needed to be taken care of. he needed someone by his side.,
he nodded his head slightly, "I know where we can go."
and with that I gripped hold of both of his hands, standing up and helping him up behind me. when we were both standing he towered over me per usual. we stood there for some time, just smiling at each other, happy we were both there.
I broke the gaze and spun around, beginning to pull him away from the crowd just like the beginning of the night.
he drunkly giggled behind me, "im so happy I met you, jade."
the same smile was on my face as I gazed up into the sky, "me too, luke."