It was probably when you were around seven, an age where you were supposed to be innocent and childlike, but one instance of déjà vu, and you felt like you had already been living for decades.
It all started when your parents introduced you to a new neighbour moving right beside your house; a couple with a lovely son. Of course, like any other cliché, that son had to be a cutie that swings from hot and cold whenever he interacted with people, so that you, an average-looking girl with angelic heart will be able to melt his coldness, and he would grow up to be in love with you.
Unfortunately, this wasn't your average childhood friend to lover story. This was a yandere story, where the boy not only would grow up to be interested in you, but he would also made people in the school isolated you, causing you to wholeheartedly rely on him.
Honestly, to isolate your loved one so that they would rely on you is beyond your understanding. Why can't those lunatics just be honest?
【Under the drizzle of rain while holding the umbrella for their love interest, they would then look at them seriouslyーor shylyーand said; "I like you, so it would make me happy if you relied on me."】
Why can't it be like this?
【Smiling maliciously at the sight of their love interest crying helplessly in the empty classroom, they reached out their hands like a savior, bringing their loved one to their embrace to comfort them. "Don't worry. I won't abandon you. I will always be by your side, darling."】
Instead, why does it have to be like this?
Furthermore, another thing you noticed about these types of stories was that the yandere authors, as if they shared the same braincells, started to call their average-looking, average-personality characters, darling, while the crazy, hot ones are called, well, yandere.
What's their definition of darling anyway? You're not anyone's darling. That word felt like it was used to undermine you honestly and you don't like that.
Anyway, back to the story; the stage has been set, the little darling female lead has already met her little yandere male lead, all that's left is some cringeworthy praise and self-sacrificing action by the girl to melt the cold heart of that boy.
However, that didn't happen. Why? Because on the day he was supposed to open his heart to you, you have already remembered and realized the true essence of this world, hence on the day he ran away from home, under the heavy rain of cats and dogs, you didn't follow the script by going out to look for him. Instead, you were having a cozy day under your blanket, with a mug of your favorite drink, warmth against your skin, while you were watching the television.
ーand then you were told that he died from a car accident.
"..." well, that's escalated quickly.
Anyway, you do feel guilty at first, often plague by the nightmares of his ghost crawling at the edge of your bed asking you why would you abandon him? But then you remembered a certain scene of the original storyline, in which at that time, his isolation plan was exposed to you by accident and after hours of hide and seek, I-ran-and-you-catch-me, he finally resorted to guilt trip.
【His handsome face contorted from sadness, tears pooling inside that emerald eyes of his. The way it glistened somehow reminded you of jewels. Those pearl-like tears gently rolled down his cheeks and trickled down his chin.
He sobbed. "If you're not going to love me, then you shouldn't have search for me at that time. You shouldn't have made me fall for you. You shouldn't have given me hope and reason to stay alive."】
"..." that fucker had a lot of nerve to play the victim and made you to be the perpetrator instead.
Miraculously, after remembering such a scene, you don't feel as bad as before, and his ghost too didn't come to visit you anymore in your nightmares.
Of course, people might still view you as some kind of a heartless bitch if they knew what you felt towards his death. After all, he's only a child, surely you can fix him before he went astray, no? But no thanks. Not once have you ever dream to become a technician. Plus, even his parents weren't able to fix him, what makes people so confident that you can?
You're not a washing machine that can clean all his dirts and turn him pure again. You're just a human being.
Besides, it's not like you were the one that orchestrated that car accident. Fate clearly tried to help you here by killing him before the main story even started so if there's anyone to blame, it's fate.
Now, with him out of the picture, you were now a free womanーor at least that's what you thoughtーuntil you belatedly realized that it wasn't just him that's crazy, this world is literally filled with two types of people; darling and yandere. It's like this world was made to accomodate all the characters created by the yandere authors. Heck, there's even a forum online that discussed various kidnapping methods to be used on darling!
"It's one hell of a day again," you sighed, lying on the bed exhaustively.
Ever since you had an epiphany that you've living in a world of yandere, you have been trying to avoid being someone's darling, and how to do that? One just had to be normal. Don't be too kind and also don't be too rough. More importantly, don't stand out. Just blend in the background like a mob character, but that's easier said than done. Just a couple of years ago, you were almost killed by a lesbian yandere who's pining after your deskmate. Apparently, she doesn't like the way you're breathing beside her darling, it made her jealous, she said.
"..." are you kidding me? the trees did not produce oxygen just for her to inhale them alone!
Hence, you stopped acting like a mob, after all, the risk of being killed as a mob is higher than dying as a darling, but to seek protection from others, especially yandere, is something you won't do at all, so you decided, you will protect yourself by being a yandere.
However, to be a yandere, you have to exude all the toxic traits belonging to a yandere. In addition, you needed to prepare a tragic backstory for yourself, and you also needed to find an innocent darling to be obsessed with, because a yandere without a darling is a threat to other yanderes who's delusional enough to think that you would go after their darling. Fortunately, you knew just the right way to pretend to be one without involving a living being.
"Big sis?"
Your thought was then interrupted by the knocks on your door.
You reluctantly dragged yourself to open the door, narrowing your eyes at the sight of your little sister's blushing cheeks. She was looking at you shyly, almost like a maiden in love, it gave you the chills honestly, thank god she's straight.
"Big sis, you know, Iー" she cupped her own flushed cheeks, looking embarrassed. "ーI think I'm in love."
You almost let out a groan at her declaration of love. After all, this wasn't her first time falling in love. In this world, where there are two types of people, which is darling and yandere, your little sister was born as the latter. She's the type of yandere who yearned for a sweet romance, thus, causing her to be somewhat of a player. God knew how horrified you were back then when you found a boy tied up in her room, a piece of clothing in his mouth to prevent him from screaming, and she was only fourteen at that time.
However, you noticed that her methods were rather forceful and deranged when treating her darling, so she wasn't able to induce stockholm syndrome in him at all. Thinking back, that boy would probably die had you not intervene back then.
"So why are you telling me that?" You leaned against the wall for support.
"He confessed to me first," she smiled at the memory. "What should I do, big sis, I really really really want to lock him up!"
You hid the disgust you felt for your sibling as you think of her circumstance. If the one who confessed to her is a yandere, then by all means, please locked him up, she would do the society a favor and he too would probably be happy, but if the one who confessed to her is an innocent and oblivious darling, then bye-bye, you don't think this relationship would be long-lasting.
"Like I said why are you telling me this?"
"Big sis," she then gave you a pitiable look. "Iー You know, it was a long journey, but I finally found my right one, at least I think I do, but what about you? The world is vast and there's so many people out there, so you should stop pining after a dead person."
Your body went rigid at the mention of a dead person and your eyes reflexively glanced at the pictures stuck to your walls. What reflected on those pictures were the face of your destinied yandere, the one who died in that car accident.
Yes, it was shameless of you, but it was necessary for your freedom. Somehow, you managed to convince the people around you that you were madly, obsessively, in love with a dead person, and your heart will never be moved by another man, much less find a replacement for him.
"So you came here to brag?" You sneered as you took a step closer to her before slamming her against the wall. "Don't go too far. Someone who's so wishy-washy with her feelings like you had no right to educate me. You, of all people, can never understand the love I hold for him."
Yes, it's the kind of love where you would even go as far as to visit his grave to thank him for dying and making your life more convenient to live.
However, despite your threatening posture, your little sister seemed rather happy by the silly grin she had on her face. As expected, after all, for a yandere who seeked sweet romance like her, your love towards that dead person was incredibly sweet that she even told you once that she wanted a lover like youーone who won't forget her even after death, even better if they followed her to the afterlife too.
She giggled. "I'm glad you're still preserving and staying true to your love."
You expected this honestly. Her suggestion was just to test your feelings. You got to thank her though, was it not for her finding your made-up diary consisting of your feelings towards that dead person, and the pictures you begged his parents to give you to, then you don't think anyone will even consider you to be a yandere. All thanks to her loose mouth, both your parents and the people at school knew that you had an old flame that you can't forgetーa dead one at that.
Snorting at her childish behavior, you turned around and went back inside your room, however, there was something that you forget.
In this world where a love so devoted one can kill a person and get away with it is normalized, such a thing clearly only happened in fiction, and when in fiction, anything can be made into a reality.
ーincluding a ghost of a child who's looking at his pictures on your walls.
That little ghost turned his head at you, noticing how you were standing frozen in front of the closed door. He smiled gently.
"I didn't think you would love me this much, (Y/n)."
Shit.