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All rights to C. S. Lewis
Chapter 8: "Bad weather"
With the first weak rays of sun and the cool and salty morning breeze coming from the sea, a squirrel and three mice left Cair Paravel. They would travel north for two days, half the time it would take to the company that would leave the second morning after their departure, unaware to any of this.
This schedule would give them time to get to the dwarves, unnoticed, to let them know of the arrival of the company and keep an eye on the road for any altercation the soldiers might encounter. All this while staying hidden, all the time.
The Kings and Diácano saw them departure from an archway hidden behind large plants near the castle walls. Hoping for the best they turned as soon as they saw the last red feather from the mice's hat disappear in the tall grass near the woods that surrounded part of the castle.
Too many things had to be arranged yet before the company left towards the dwarves. But by the end of day there were fifteen, men and creatures, all volunteers and very skilled warriors of the King's Army. Despite the Erasmus' resistance they concluded that it was for the best if Diácano leaded this mission.
So the rest of the time before their departure he kept Casio, his fellow centaur and second in command, by his side giving him guidelines to follow in his absence.
On the evening before the company's departure Edmund was walking back to his chambers for a quick clean up before supper when he spotted Susan by a window in the dim corridor.
"The weather is changing" stated Susan sensing his presence, not taking her eyes from what she was looking out from the window. He had wanted to talk with his sister since their arrival to the castle two weeks ago but she seemed determined to avoid him.
Edmund came to a stop besides her and look out too from the window. They could see the sea, furious waves crashing on the rocks of the cliffs, dark clouds covering the sky.
It had been like this for several days now that he thought of it. "What do you mean?" he asked her anyways.
She looked at him for a second, thinking her answer and then turned to the window again. "Come on, a monsoon?" she ironically questioned.
"Well, I wouldn't say it is a monsoon, the weather has been quite humid these last few days, it's just a storm probably", he speculated.
But Susan just shook her head, "It's something else, you can feel it too Ed" she nudged him gently "like something is moving in the shadows, slowly stirring and getting ready. Darkness." Although what she was saying was alarming her voice was calm and quiet, her blue eyes never leaving the sea, and her face serene.
They stood in silence while Edmund let this sink in. Indeed, there was something else from the weather itself, but he couldn't put his finger on it, which made him wiry, so he decided to drop that and instead he asked something that was bothering him as much as the freaking weather but it was something he could get an answer about.
"What's going on Su? You seem out of it since we've come to Narnia".
"I thought it was over" she simply said.
"We are not supposed to be here Edmund. We weren't coming back. This was over" her eyes blazed with irritation.
"But aren't you happy to be back? We are in Narnia" Edmund couldn't grasp the idea that his sister was in such discomfort in Narnia. It was impossible for him to imagine.
"Ask yourself this same question once this is over and you are back in your Cambridge room preparing for exams, pretending everything is normal when two days before you were a king" she said bitterly. "Edmund, can't you see? This won't last, soon this will all disappear as if nothing ever happened. And at what cost? This is a war Ed, anything could go wrong, a poor shooting and someone could die".
Edmund's head was spinning, of course he knew the risks but he never actually stopped and thought about them, like he felt safe like those things wouldn't happen to them and at the end they would go back home as and feel sad about living but that's how it was supposed to be. That was the plan.
"How can you go back from an experience so splendid as it is Narnia to England and being no one?" she asked him intently, her eyes were glassy from all the tears threatening to fall down her face, his sister's face showed so much sorrow that he felt the desperate need to hug her, and so he did. He held his sister in his arms while silent tears wet his shirt. He felt so bad for her.
"You are not anyone. Don't say that Su. We love you, you are our sister, that's who you are, and you don't have to pretend to be anyone else. You have us and we have you. Forever. And Narnia leaves within us as long as we keep believing it is." he spoke quietly in her ear trying to soothe her.
Slowly she looked up at him with puffy eyes and a red nose "You promise?"
"Of course. No matter what" he reassured her. She smiled weakly but this time it didn't falter.
They walk silently to their chambers in the west wing and stopped first in her door.
"Thank you Ed. You are becoming a great man and I am very proud of you" she said sincerely touching his hand and then got into her room closing the door behind her, not before saying "I'll see you in a minute for supper. Clean yourself up." This made Edmund smile widely.
As he walked across the corridor to his chamber he couldn't stop thinking about what Susan said, her words resonated in his head. Yes, it was difficult to go back, he struggled a lot to find his place on Earth, but these experiences shaped him as a person, he had learnt so much from Narnia, he was a better person because of it. And not for a minute he doubt about Aslan's choices.
He had done some bad things in the past that still haunted them after years. It was his forever debt. But he tried to mend it every day and it was because of this place that he changed. He would never regret coming to Narnia.
But he never actually thought how this affected his siblings. He assumed going back was hard for all of them and that coming back was the best thing that would ever happen to them. Guess he was wrong. He was aware of Peter's struggle and reluctance the first time, and Lucy's hope, he knew she never gave up, she always saw the possibility of returning but continued on with her life. And Susan, she seemed to have it all figured out, she seemed to be the one who had adapted the fastest. It was true that their siblings had noticed she was a friend of parties and social relationships. Almost in excess. They saw her become materialist, but he never thought there was an underreason for that behavior.
He felt ashamed he didn't realize before. His sister was suffering and none of the siblings had realized that. Consumed in these thoughts he prepared for dinner. He still had a few minutes so he plopped down on the bed. His head was a wheel that wouldn't stop turning and with his eyes closed he lost himself in the madness of his broodings.
And like that Peter found him, sprawled in his bed, ayes closed and his forehead creased.
"You know, I thing you already have wrinkles on your forehead" He joked leaning over the frame door of his chambers.
Edmund sighed heavily "don't you ever knock?" he asked irritably.
"You know I don't. Remember that time I caught you –"he started joking.
"Shut up" Peter always liked to laugh at that incident from when he was younger. And this moment was not the exception as he was snickering from the door.
Seeing as he brother didn't react but stayed laying down with the same worried expression Peter calm himself and closed the door behind him before sitting on the chair next to his bed. "What's got you so worried?"
Edmund turned to face him, his elbow sinking on the mattress as he leaned on it. "I talked to Susan" hearing this Peter straightened in the chair listening carefully "I assume you notice her behavior?" Edmund asked him seeing how his brother seemed so interested.
"Of course I've noticed, I talked about this with Lucy. Wait, should I call her?" he asked standing up.
"Nonono, I'll talk to her later, I don't want to make Susan uncomfortable when she sees the three of us coming together for supper" to which Peter nodded his head in understanding and sat down again. "She's not happy to be here, it is difficult to her to go back, she is struggling with our reality back home. We have to be there for her before she loses her way Peter" he quickly explained.
Peter sat there, his hand on his chin, thinking "Well, I understand. And I am not surprised by this. It was hard for me to, and it is hard now. I am afraid of going back home, and I am afraid to lose one of you here. This is a war after all" to this Edmund opened his eyes in surprised but when he tried to talk Peter cut him off getting up and patting his shoulder "I'll talk to her later Ed. Thanks for telling me. Come on, let's head down for supper".
As they turned in the hallway to the dining room they saw King Erasmus and Bill talking at the entrance and as they approached the wooden doors they could hear Erasmus talking.
"I'm sorry Bill, but not this time. Alright?" he apologized Erasmus while Bill was looking down nodding his head.
"Alright" he sounded disappointed when he spoke.
"Cheer up boy! There are plenty of things to do here equal in importance" Erasmus tried to cheer him up and clapped his back urging him to the dining room while the corner of Bill's mouth quirked up.
They caught up with Erasmus at the wooden door he was looking at Bill's back restlessness.
"All good there?" Peter asked curiously.
Looking at us with a smile he said offhandedly "Oh yes!" but his smiled faltered and he shook his head with apprehension "Bill wants to go with the company to the north, but I am afraid I cannot allow that, it would be irresponsible of me, he is not that experienced as the others" he finally said.
"Well, I agree with that decision, it is an unnecessary risk, he can stay here and train more for what's coming" coincided Peter.
"Exactly, but he is young and excited with all this new things here and all the skills he discovered he has, that I'm afraid he might do something, well, stupid" Erasmus admitted.
Both brothers nodded their heads in understanding.
"Maybe I could train with him" Edmund offered.
"Oh that would be extraordinary!" Erasmus exclaimed "he really respects your abilities Edmund" and smiling broadly he entered the room.
"Is this your way of getting the sister to notice you?" asked Peter quietly with a wink and quickly turns around before Edmund could even answer leaving him rolling his eyes while following suit.
They sat around the table along with Susan, Lucy, Bill, Calantha and Erasmus. They ate dinner quietly making small conversation.
"Bill?" called Edmund casually to the boy who was toying with his food across the table, he looked up at him "I am training tomorrow, would you like to join me? I saw you have a few tricks, maybe we could exchange some moves? I am afraid I'm a little rusty, I could use the practice" he proposed.
Bill's eyes went round and he almost dropped the glass on his plate in his excitement "really? Yes, that would be awesome! Maybe you can teach me how you dodged that soldier the other day? It was amazing!" he really looked like a child on a sweet shop.
"Sure" answered Edmund with a smile, Bill's smile was contagious. Resuming on his dinner he noticed out of the corner of his eye how Lucy was smiling while she watched Bill sitting in front of her, and Edmund knew that little that had to do with his smile being contagious.
"Where is Anne? I haven't seen her all day?" asked Susan suddenly looking around the table, to this question Edmund perked his ears but said nothing continuing to eat his dinner. "Is she alright?"
"Oh yes, she is fine. She is out collecting some herbs with the centaurs, you know tonight's the full moon and all that stuff, apparently what they collect today will be special" said Bill nonchalant.
"Well, let's hope the rain doesn't catch her! This weather is horrible!" Mentioned Calantha and to this comment Susan straightened up and nervously looked out the window at the dark sky. "Everything alright dear?" asked Calantha looking at her with concern.
"Yes" answered her Susan maybe a little too hurried and brightly for anyone to buy it, but no one commented on it.
By the time they left the dining room a few lightnings could be seen in the dark sky.
The next morning the company went north through the mud that the rain from last night had caused.
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