POV Mew
- So... you asked him for some time?? - the amused tone of voice Jane was using put Mew's nerves to the ceiling.
- I know it sounds dumb... - Mew started saying.
- I'm sorry for saying this Mew... but it doesn't sound dumb, you sound like a jerk.
- Aow!
Mew and Gulf had done all their scenes at Pagan Island really quickly. As a reward, they had got to spend time together visiting the island as tourists. They went to the beach together and had one hell of a time. No cameras, no director, no script... just them.
At night, they had talked... about nothing important. Mew had realized how little he actually knew about Gulf. Simple things like when were his first kiss or his favorite color. He had been a little depressed about it. Made him feel like the worst boyfriend ever. But Gulf hadn't care.
- You know me P'Mew... you know the things that matter. The rest will come with time.
There was so much at stake, and that filled Mew's heart with fear.
What would people think?
What would their friends think? Mild? Boat?
What would their families think?
Being with Gulf had brought nothing but happiness to Mew's life... but it had brought fear as well.
He had needed to think for a bit. Re-valuate his decisions. And that's what he told Gulf.
- Are you regretting being with me? - he had asked with sad eyes.
- No! - Mew had taken his hand - Never. I just need to clear my head. I promise you I will call you.
Four days had passed since that particular conversation, and even though they had exchanged some messages over LINE, they haven't talk yet.
- What? I'm your friend, so I have to call you on your shit when you're being an asshole. Well, guess what? You're being an asshole - Jane said.
Mew knew she was right. But that didn't mean he liked that fact.
- Gulf understood where I was coming from.
- Because that boy is too sweet to you. You have been together for... what? A week? And you're asking him for time already?
- When you put it like that... - Mew sighed - I just wanted to get rid of this odd feeling I have. I don't want to hurt him.
- And what do you think you're doing now? He must be out of his mind, worried for you.
Mew had to give it to her. He was being a jerk to his boyfriend.
Boyfriend.
He never actually thought he would be referring to Gulf like that. Or anyone, for that matters.
Being in a relationship gave Mew a restless feeling. And he didn't know why. But Jane was right, it wasn't fair to Gulf to just wait for him to put his shit together alone.
- I know - he finally caved - You're right.
- I'm always right - Jane said with a superior stare.
- Fuck you.
- Not interested.
He was gonna kill her someday.
- I called him this morning, he's gonna spend the night here - he said to Jane while moving to the kitchen to find some water.
He was in the process of taking some water out of a bottle glass when he heard the next words coming out of his sister's mouth.
- Do you have condoms and lube?
- *cough* *cough* - Mew almost choked with the water - ALAI WA?
- Don't play a saint with me, young man. Your health and Gulf's are important.
- We just started dating!!
- So what? When it happens it happens - she said while shrugging.
Sex was another thing he had in his head constantly, and not for the right reasons.
The thought of being intimate with Gulf didn't bother him at all. In fact, he was ready for it, but there was so much in the way he needed to clear first.
It was going to be Gulf's first time with a man, or so he thought.
That alone put a lot of pressure on Mew, he was starting to feel stressed about it.
What if he didn't do a good job?
What if Gulf didn't like it? After all, he had a girlfriend before.
What if Gulf didn't get excited when he saw him naked?
And worst of all... Mew could get a flashback.
Mew hadn't been intimate with anyone since HIM and they didn't even have sex, not once. But some things did happen and just thinking of the consequences of that particular night...
It would be the worst to have a panic attack in the middle of trying to be with Gulf.
He didn't deserve that.
- You know what? I think it's time for you to go - Mew finally said to Jane.
- Oh... throwing me out I see...
- See it like you want to see it. Just go away.
- Fine. I'll go. But don't think this conversation is over - she said with a dangerous stare.
- Wouldn't dare.
After Jane was gone, Mew started doing preparations for that night's dinner. He wanted to prepare fried pork with basil. Gulf's favorite dish. Mew had called Jane for a recipe when she had suddenly decided to come to his condo to talk to him.
Meddling woman.
But Mew knew she was just worried about him. Mew was worried too. But he had come to realize that he would rather feel that way than not being with Gulf at all.
- Do you think you're ready MewMew? - Jan had asked.
- I don't know that for a fact. But I do know how Gulf makes me feel.
- How is that?
- He makes me feel like I can finally breathe again.
- Then why are you staying away? - she was genuinely confused.
- Because he'll want answers... answers I'm not ready to give.
- He'll know when to back off. Give your guy some credit for the love of god!
Mew's thoughts were interrupted by the sounds of the numbers being put at his condo's door.
- P'Mew? - came the question.
- In the kitchen.
Gulf head popped from the kitchen door. After seeing him, a bright smile stared to cover his all face.
Mew loved that smile.
- P'Mew~ - he said with his baby voice.
Gulf moved to where Mew was standing, fully intending to hug Mew, but he stopped before reaching his goal.
- Emm... - Gulf stood there in the middle of the kitchen, fidgeting without knowing what to do.
He's hesitating. Because of me
I'm an idiot.
Mew moved forward, taking his boyfriend's body into a tight embrace. Gulf fidgeted for a moment, not knowing what to do with his hands before returning the hug. Mew hide his face on the crook of Gulf's neck before talking.
- I'm sorry.
- What for? - Gulf seemed actually surprised.
- For asking for some time. It wasn't because of you, I swear.
Gulf hand found Mew's hair and started stroking it softly.
- I know Phi. I know this is not easy for you - Gulf said quietly, still caressing Mew's hair - I just hope one day when you're feeling restless about something, you come to me for support instead of going through it alone.
Mew tighten the hug, while tears started to form at the back of his eyes. Gulf was right. They were together now. That meant Mew wasn't alone anymore. He didn't have to deal with all the problems by himself.
- I know Gulf. I will be better. I promise.
- I don't need you to be better. I just want you to let me carry the burdens with you. I'm stronger than I look Phi.
Even if Gulf said that Mew was still afraid of him finding out about his past.
Will he be disappointed at him?
Will he be disgusted by him?
Will it make him see him differently?
So many questions. The fear for the answers consumed Mew's heart.
Mew guided Gulf to the table in the center of the kitchen to sit down.
- I will share everything with you, I promise. I just want to enjoy this time with you before...
- Before what? - Gulf asked.
- Before you decide I'm not worth it - Mew finished in a low tone of voice.
Gulf leaned forward and kissed him softly.
- That's not gonna happen. Don't you see P'Mew? It's too late for me to back off - Gulf whispered against his lips before kissing him again.
Gulf went to pull back when Mew grabbed him by the back of his neck.
- Do you mean it? - Mew asked.
- Totally - Gulf murmured before brushing his lips over Mew's once again.
Then he gave him another kiss and another. Every kiss grew a little deeper than the last one. By the time Gulf came out for air, Mew had his arm wrapped around Gulf's waist and was pulling them to their feet. Mew's eyes stared at Gulf's, looking for something, and then his mouth slammed down on his boyfriend's and took complete control of the encounter.
Passion made them lose control over what was happening. Mew's big hands skimmed Gulf's ass before giving them a gentle squeeze, and then he was lifting him. He set his young boyfriend on the table and used his body to maneuver him so Gulf was laying flat on his back.
Mew's mouth continued to consume Gulf's, making them feel like they were the only people in the whole world. Mew grabbed both of Gulf's hands and pinned them to the table and held him still, as his mouth still plundered Gulf's. When Mew tried to pull back, Gulf's mouth tried to follow him, but with Mew holding him down, it was impossible for him to do so. Mew should have been afraid of the level of passion he was showing to his boyfriend, but at that moment he couldn't care less.
If there was a reason not to do this... now I can't remember it.
Mew's dick was already hard and pressing painfully against his sports pants. Maybe he needed to stop.
This is getting out of hands.
But his passion fogged brain couldn't find it to release Gulf's hands. And when Gulf whispered "Please P'Mew", he was completely gone.
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POV Gulf
I need him.
Gulf had never felt that way before in his life. Sexual experiences were lacking while going through puberty. Better explained... he was still a virgin.
Not a thing that bothered him or anything like that, but it made him feel a little nervous.
What if he made a mistake and Mew backed off?
What if he ridiculed himself with his lack of experience?
He didn't want to disappoint Mew.
But all that jumped out the window the moment Mew had kissed him. It had felt so good. And at the moment Gulf needed relief, and even though he knew where the encounter was leading, he knew without a doubt that the only one who could give him what he needed was Mew.
Mew leaned down to kiss him and transferred both his wrists to one hand above Gulf's head. His tongue continued to play with Gulf's as his long fingers traced down his chest to his abdomen to finally settle on his groin. Gulf tried to prolong the contact, but Mew moved his hand to his belly to push the hem of his shirt up.
Gulf let out a loud moan as Mew's hand made contact with his sensitive skin. His mouth left Gulf's to leave a trail of kisses down his cheek to his neck while his hand pushed his shirt higher.
Gulf struggled to pull his hands free, not because he was afraid, but because he was desperate to touch his boyfriend. He finally cried out in relief when Mew's hand rubbed over his dick.
- Don't stop - Gulf begged.
- Shhh... I'm going to take care of you - Mew said against his mouth and then he was kissing him again.
Gulf felt his fingers fumble with the zipper of his pants for a moment and then his veiny hand plunged into his underwear in one soft move. Gulf screamed with pleasure when his hand encircled his dick. Electricity went through his body when Mew started stroking him. Between Mew's kissed and his hand's movement, Gulf couldn't even say anything before his orgasm slammed into him without warning.
The pleasure had been like anything he had ever felt. Gulf had jerked off over the years, but nothing could compare with the experience he just had. He hadn't had any control over his body. He had been Mew's and Mew's only. He felt tears prick his eyes as Mew whispered "You're so beautiful", and then he was laying a chaste kiss on his lips.
The entire thing hadn't lasted more than a couple of minutes, but it felt like hours before Gulf was able to come back to his senses.
- Are you ok? - Mew asked, releasing his hands as he ran his fingers through Gulf's hair. His other hand was still on his pants.
Gulf managed to nod, still too overwhelmed to speak, and then he was kissing Mew again. He kept the kiss brief as Mew was looking down at him with some unknown feeling in his eyes.
- Are YOU ok? - Gulf asked.
Mew copied his nod as he started to pull back, pulling Gulf into a sitting position. Gulf couldn't tell what Mew was thinking, but he didn't miss the big bulge in his pants. Guilt went through him as he reached for it, but Mew stopped him by grabbing his hand.
- But you didn't... - Gulf said awkwardly.
Mew studied him for a moment before lifting his hand to his mouth. He tenderly kissed the back of it before releasing it.
- This was for you only.
Gulf managed to nod. He couldn't trust himself to speak.
He can be such a gentleman.
- Do you want to clean yourself before helping me make dinner? - Mew said.
- Yes - Gulf answered.
Gulf got off the table and pecked Mew's lips before heading to the bathroom with a smile on his face.
I can't believe that happened.
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Gulf startled awake when he felt Mew's body jerk beside him.
- No! - he murmured, voice heavy - No! Stop!
- P'Mew? - Gulf whispered. He rubbed the sleep out of his eyes and sat up the best he could.
He was trapped between Mew's arms. After dinner, they had gone to Mew's bedroom to watch a movie and they had felt asleep. Mew had been awfully quiet, but he had assured Gulf he was fine.
- Hey - Gulf placed his hand on his chest - P'Mew, wake up.
Mew's body began to twitch. He mumbled incoherent words.
Another nightmare... a bad one.
- P'Mew!
Teeth clenched, a scream tore out of his throat. Panic started to fill Gulf's body.
- P'Mew! - he yelled again, getting to his knees with some difficulty. He took Mew's shoulders and shook him, trying to wake him up.
- Wake up! P'Mew, wake up!
With a gasp, his eyes flew open and he sat up. He stared upfront like he was looking at nothing.
- Hey - Gulf whispered - Are you ok?
Mew's body twisted, and Gulf watched in horror as he rolled off to his side and vomited onto the floor.
- Oh my god!
Gulf started rubbing his back, trying to soothe him while he gagged. He held his hair away from his face.
- It's ok Phi. I'm here - Gulf repeated those words over and over again.
Shit... what do I do now?