CHAPTER 6
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Bright light shines through the blinds, alerting Darryl to the oncoming morning. Quiet birds chirp outside of the building as he threw the blankets off from his tense body, rubbing sleep from his tired eyes. He stepped out of bed and onto carpeted floor, crouching down under his desk and pulling open the mini fridge's door handle. He took a container of spaghetti that his mom cooked for him the day before and slipped on his socks and shoes-- though he didn't really need them, since the college campus dormitory building is basically his home. He trudged through the cleared hallways, feeling cold air rush at him from every angle. It wasn't early enough to be freezing cold outside, but it was still pretty cold for Spring. I let my mind wander as I made my way to the cafeteria area. I set my container in the microwave with the top slightly popped off so it didn't explode under the heat(don't ask). It was finished in no time, mind numbing any emotions I wished to feel at that time. Sadness, fear, paranoia to protect me in her absence. No, I didn't feel a thing. I went back to my dorm and ate my breakfast spaghetti in silent thought, feeling myself on the verge of tears yet so far away at the same time. That's how my story goes, isn't it?
Being without Lucy should be setting new levels of fear for me, shouldn't it? Then why do I feel nothing? I stabbed my fork into the warmed pasta, trying not to let my mind wander this morning. I don't feel okay going out-- I didn't go to college yesterday, my mom actually called in for me that day right before we explained the situation. I had to call in again-- I don't think I could ever go back without her, it doesn't feel the same. The same memory keeps replaying in my head.
Two years ago, when Lucy was still in training, she missed an alert. I fainted and hit my head so hard that I ended up in the hospital for three days. Some kids were cooing at her from a distance, and I didn't think much of it. The next part was hazy, and my mom (who was thankfully there) told me I was bleeding so much that she thought someone had spilled a red paint bucket.
It was terrifying. I didn't want to go back to a hospital ever again in my life-- the only reason I would end up there would be if something bad had happened, right?
Not to be a Debby-downer, but something bad can happen at any moment. You can't predict that the next morning you wake up will be your last, or your job is going to fire you, or that your mother will end up in the hospital. But it still happens. Today could be your last if you take your dog on a walk in the wrong area, and get hit by a car, or faint and hit something way too hard.
Before I knew it, dawn turned into bright afternoon. I listened to music through blaring headphones, currently writing an email to my biology professor about our latest lesson. My phone buzzed from beside me, and I used one hand to grab it off of my nightstand where it laid. I finished the sentence I was working on before opening the notification I got. It was a text notification, from contact 'Zak Ahmed'. It was already after school was 'over' for the most part-- I didn't know about his night schedule, but I figured he wouldn't be in class right now.
A smile tugged at my lips when I realized it was him. We haven't texted since the incident happened, and I haven't gone to school- so we haven't seen each other either.
'Why havent u been to school? u sick?'
I quickly typed a response, met by an even faster reply. 'Sorry Zak, I'm just worried about going places other than my dorm without Lucy'
'Oh, i'm sorry dude. I'm sure she'll turn up eventially'
I chuckled softly at his bad spelling and grammar. 'it's ok. i'd rather be where it's safe in case i have an episode'
'I can come over if it makes you feel better?'
I paused.
'Sure, come over. Do you know where i live?'
A knock came from my door a half hour later, long and repetitive. I groaned softly as I climbed out of bed, shuffling over to the door, and opening it before any more minuscule damage could be done to the wood.
I knew Zak was coming over-- I had to tell him which dorm I was and everything, but a look of confusion managed to creep across my face anyway. Once the door was open and we got a good look of each other, he smiled brightly. "Hey, Darryl. How you holding up?"
"I'm doing as good as I can, I guess..." I deadpanned and stepped aside to let him walk in. "Thanks for coming, even though you didn't need to."
"Don't worry about it, I wanted to come over anyway." He took a seat at the foot of my bed and I grabbed my laptop, stabilizing the device against my arm as I stared quizzically at the screen. I was watching some other Minecraft YouTube-- someone named JefHalo and GoodBoyHalo. They fought a lot, but their social medias seemed to show a different story. It seemed like they were pretty good friends-- with the matching 'halo' in their name. I didn't question it, their videos were entertaining when they weren't quote-unquote having their 90th divorce. There were a lot of parody accounts who posted clips of them, and I found those more enjoyable than the rest. They also hosted events on their Minecraft Servers, which was ... interesting, for a block game. "What are you staring at?" Zak asked, making me jolt in surprise. I had gotten a little carried away thinking again.
"Nothing, i was just..."
He peeked over my shoulder, catching a glimpse of the paused Minecraft video I had been watching. "Oh, you've seen them too? I'm not a huge fan but they're entertaining." He said, shooting me a huge smile as if it was an accomplishment.
Even so, I couldn't help but smile too. His goofy demeanor was exactly what I needed right now. "Yeah, I'm not a big fan either, but I like their videos."
We spent that afternoon watching different Minecraft content creators, and he seemed way too excited to share everyone he knew with me. Some group called 'SleepyINC', two teenagers who happened to be entertaining enough to be way more successful than expected, and some 'Fundy' and 'Nihachu' person. It was a lot to take in, but once the evening fell, we had figured it was time to stop watching MCYT (that's what he called it).
I warmed up two containers of pasta for the both of us as he set up the movie we decided to watch. It was just some Netflix thing called 'The half of it'. I didn't know what it was about-- he refused to tell me, saying it was all apart of the surprise and was expecting me to say how I interpreted it by the end of the movie.
I think it was about halfway into the first of two hours when I started to 'lose' it. I stared blankly at the screen, and I just knew in the back of my mind that my face was shifting between inexpressive and discomfort. I found myself staring at the bed sheets underneath our legs, fiddling with my fingers beside him as we both leaned against the pillows propped up on the wall.
It took me a second to process, but I heard fingers snapping and Zak calling my name. I could barely tell that the movie had been paused because I hadn't been paying attention for a little while. "Darryl? You good?" He asked, but his voice sounded so far away. I couldn't bring myself to answer, staring into space for a second more before I felt my face contort with pure emotional pain. I felt hot tears prick at my eyes, and not a second later I had my knees to my chin and I was attempting to wrap my arms around my knees and face.
Two hands with a hint of saturated blue stopped me from hiding completely, which made me unbelievably apprehensive. I felt the room getting hotter, and I just wanted to curl up and get away from whatever had me so distressed. I closed my eyes, hearing muffled words being thrown in my direction.
I couldn't focus on his words, and god did I try to. I really did, I wanted to understand but the words just kept going in through one ear and out through the other. Flashes of hot and cold made it worse as I just sat there and took it all.
I almost couldn't process the hand on my shoulder, pulling me into the figure-- no, it was only Zak. It was just him. He trapped me in a loving hug, and suddenly I was leaning into his touch in the midst of an emotional attack.
I couldn't tell how long it was until I was back to my 'normal' self. It felt like it had been a few seconds, but I feel like it might have been a few hours at the same time. I was grateful for his touch, his compassion. Lucy would have reacted better, but I she wasn't here now, was she?
We went back to watching the movie, and I heard him gently whispering to me during some of the scenes. Was he trying to make me feel better? Was it because he was worried, or did he just not want to deal with my emotional baggage? Maybe both?
It was making me feel better, though.
I could tell that within the last 30 minutes of the movie, that I was already falling asleep. I had let myself slip a few times, but nothing that would put me in a position beyond my conscious control. I stole a few glances at the other boy, who was the same height while we sat down. I wasn't that much taller than him, but I still liked to hold it above his head. Ha, get it?
It didn't exactly catch me by surprise when I closed my eyes for a little too long, and suddenly I couldn't hear the movie playing anymore. I didn't really care though, either. It was just really warm.
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Zak stared intently at the screen, watching as two characters had a small heart-to-heart. It was something about the future and love, none of which he had wanted to think about right now. "Do you think they end up together in the end?" He asked, pausing for an answer. None came, though, to his surprise. He glanced over at the other boy, suddenly realizing he had fallen asleep. Darryl had ended up leaning on Zak's shoulder and wrapping an arm around the other boy's waist well over 30 minutes ago, and he knew Darryl was tired by the way his eyes kept fluttering open and shut. It wasn't supposed to be a huge surprise, but Zak couldn't fight the redness that spread across his face.
He looked pretty while he slept. Though, he looked prettier with his bright eyes open-- there was no fighting that.
Zak smiled and fought the urge to brush his friend's hair around, turning back to the screen and waiting impatiently for the movie to be over.
It wasn't the ending they thought it would be-- well, it wasn't the ending that Zak thought it would be, but it was the ending that was explained at the very beginning. 'This wouldn't be a movie where everyone gets what they want'. He looked back to a sleepy Darryl, gently shaking his shoulder.
The boy didn't budge, and Zak slipped the glasses off of his face and folded them on the nightstand next to the bed.
He yawned into the sleeve of his hoodie, closing the laptop and plunging them into complete darkness.
Zak had half the mind to fall asleep right there, next to the boy he was beginning to fall in love with, but he knew better than to be weird. With that, the boy dressed in deep blue shifted Darryl's arm off of him and slipped on his shoes. He gently opened the door, shutting it behind them as he walked into the bright hallway.
Tomorrow will be better.
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Word Count: 2084