That night, I was the first to go upstairs to get ready for bed. Without the pressure of time, I spent as long as I could in the shower, letting the hot water ripple down my scalp and shimmy across my skin, then drip down my legs. Lazy arms swept body wash across my limbs and torso, working the liquid into a foamy purple lather that filled the bathroom with a subtle hint of lavender. This was my first shower at the villa that wasn't rushed by a line of waiting girls, so I enjoyed every extra second that my skin was gently massaged by the stream of water plummeting from the showerhead.
With my hair deep-conditioned and skin smooth and soft, I stepped out of the shower and wrapped myself in a light pink towel. Steam fogged up the nearby mirror, and I walked to the vanity and rubbed a circle in the condensation. I pulled out my toiletries from my drawer, scrubbed my face clean, and then replenished the skin with a lightweight moisturizer.
No one had come up to get ready for bed until after I'd put on my pajamas and combed out my damp hair. Peach, Giselle, and Polly walked into the dressing room, slowing down when they saw me at my vanity.
"There you are!" Peach said, walking to her vanity across from mine. She grabbed her chapstick and uncapped the tube.
"I'm almost done," I said.
Peach scrunched her face as she rubbed her lips together. "Aren't you gonna blowdry your hair?" She observed my damp hair with skepticism.
"I'm gonna go airdry it." I stood from my vanity and pulled my shorts down slightly. "I'll see you guys in a minute."
I dismissed myself and exited the dressing room. Downstairs, the kitchen and bedroom were both vacant. I slipped through the bedroom and walked out to the grass, surveying the mostly empty garden; a cameraman hid in the shadowy corners, his location only given away by the red recording light. Unbothered, I walked past the pool, down to the treeline, and along the path before arriving at the beach. The moon was on the other side of the villa but still managed to highlight the peaks of the shorebound waves. I took a seat in the sand, digging my toes into the soft earth and pulling my knees to my chest. The proximity to the sea made the stress and anxiety of Love Island worth it. If I closed my eyes, I could pretend I was back in Hawaii with my family.
"Hey," a voice approached from behind me. I turned to see Charlie exit the tree-lined path down to the beach. A cameraman followed closely behind. "Mind if I sit?"
"Yeah, sure." I couldn't hide the surprise in my tone.
Charlie sat a few feet away from me, facing the black rippling waves reaching foamy fingers toward us but falling short by several yards. "I saw you walk out into the garden; I figured this is where you went."
I turned slightly to face him. "I didn't see anyone downstairs."
"I just left my interview at the beach hut down the hallway. I figured you didn't see me," Charlie said. He kept his legs relaxed, his feet dipping into the sand. "I'm really sorry about what happened earlier today. I know if some guy came in and took someone away from me, and I couldn't do anything about it, I would feel pretty helpless."
I nodded, turning my head to face the sand. "Thanks. You've got Peach's wisdom."
Charlie let out a small laugh. "Yeah, we're good together like that. And we both care about you. I mean, you're Peach's best friend. And she talks about you so much, it feels like we're best friends sometimes."
"Well, damn. Sorry, Charlie, I know nothing about you," I laughed.
Charlie paused for a minute, letting a comfortable silence settle between us on the cool white sand. "I'm from Seattle, but I'm living across the US for my MBA. I was in a frat while getting my bachelor's degree. And I bartend. There: three facts about me."
"I knew the bartending thing, actually," I claimed proudly. "Can't say I'm too surprised about the frat pledge."
"What, do you have something against frat guys?" Charlie asked playfully. I gave him an annoyed look. "Oh, you do!" He shifted himself so he was sitting up, facing me. "What is it? Is it because frat houses are gross? The guys are totally bros?"
"It's a little bit of everything." I began feeling vulnerable and hyperaware of the cameras broadcasting our conversation to America. "What's Seattle like?"
Charlie shrugged. "It's nice. According to Peach, it sounds like Chicago, just with less snow."
"I heard it rains a lot."
"Not really," Charlie commented. "I mean, it rains. But not every day, and the raindrops are so small that you don't need an umbrella. The locals don't use them, at least. If anything, the traffic's more of an inconvenience than anything else."
"Wow." I nodded. "I would've never known." Another comfortable silence settled between us. The chorus of the crashing waves lulled closer with the rising tide. "Let's head back inside," I suggested. Though hesitant at first, Charlie eventually nodded, and we stood to our feet, walking back to the villa with the cameraman walking steadily behind us.
"Don't trip; they'll air it," Charlie joked.
We walked across the grass and entered the bedroom to see mostly everyone climbing into bed, apart from Amelia, who was pacing in the aisle. She froze when she saw me and glanced between Charlie and me. "Maddie, I'd really like to talk to you."
While I would've preferred to say, 'I'd rather not,' I submitted. "Okay. Where do you wanna go?"
Amelia pointed upstairs and began walking out of the bedroom. I followed closely behind, passing Michael and Eli, who skeptically watched as we climbed the stairs. Amelia walked into the girls' dressing room, and I followed her out onto the balcony. She plopped down on one of the couches and hugged a pillow to her stomach. I sat across from her, pulling my legs up onto the cushion and crossing them.
"Let's talk about it," Amelia poked.
I did a quick scan of the surrounding area. "What is there to talk about?"
"The elephant in the villa. I took your next pick. I was going to feel bad, but it looks like you and Charlie are getting along fine," Amelia said.
My blood began to boil. "Amelia, at first I empathized with you because I could understand the kind of pressure you were under to find your ideal guy. But lately, with the things you say, it's like you're trying to upset me. And that's not okay."
"How am I upsetting you?" Amelia asked, hugging the pillow tighter.
"Just now. 'I took your next pick.' You say it with pride like it's an accomplishment, not that you've coupled up with Noah, but that I'm not coupled up with him," I explained.
She looked up at the treeline and swept a small strand of hair behind her ear. "I'm sorry if I'm coming across that way. It's not my goal to ruin your life; it's my goal to find my perfect match. You just happened to get hurt while I did my own thing."
"And it would be fine if that's all it was. I can appreciate you wanting to find your match, but you've got to stop with the little comments and the lies that you told Noah. You know Eli and I have never had anything romantic."
Amelia pursed her lips. "I wouldn't say that. He pulled you the very first day, and you guys have talked a lot in private."
"I was helping him get another girl!" My hands ran through my hair in frustration. "Imagine if I told Noah that... that you had a thing for Michael, even though I knew it wasn't true. Wouldn't you be upset?"
"I guess," she said. "Can we be cool?"
"If you stop the little digs, we can be cool."
She opened her mouth, ready to spew some bullshit, but decided to keep it to herself. "Alright." She stood up from her seat and tossed the pillow aside. "I'm going to go pull Noah. I'll see you in the bedroom?"
I decided to pick my battles. "Sounds good."
I let her walk off a ways before getting up and walking down to the bedroom. Peach saw me enter the room and ran up to hug me.
"I was worried about you. Where'd you go?" Peach asked as she pulled back from the embrace and held my arms in place.
"To the beach. I'm alright, Peachy. Charlie followed me down and was a good friend," I stated. Peach turned to look at Charlie, watching sleepily from his side of the bed. He raised his hand in greeting at the sound of his name.
Peach walked over and sat down on the bed. "That was nice of you, Charlie!"
While she tucked herself in, I returned to the cold, foreign world that had become my bed. What was once the epicenter of my romance with Blake had become a distant memory. He laid on his side turned away from me, either already asleep or pretending to as a way of avoiding conversation. I unclipped my mic pack and set it down on my shelf along with my phone. The ledge was unusually empty, and I remembered that I'd left my water bottle in the kitchen. I walked down the hall to the kitchen and found Amelia and Noah having a serious conversation. She seemed frustrated, and he had confusion written across his face. In his hand was my water bottle.
Noah looked up as I entered the room, and Amelia followed his gaze.
"Well, why don't you tell her what you were up to?" Amelia questioned Noah accusingly.
Noah watched her blankly, then held out my water bottle for me to take. "I saw you left your water bottle on the counter, so I was going to go put it by your bed."
Amelia turned to me for an unknown reason seeking support. "And wouldn't you agree that he shouldn't be doing something like that for you? Given the circumstances?"
I watched Amelia, then grabbed my water bottle from Noah's hand. "Thanks, Noah. I appreciate it." I walked out without addressing the flaming redhead and returned to the bedroom.
I laid down on my side of the bed and turned on my side, so Blake and I were back-to-back. In doing so, I locked eyes with Peyton, who was lying on her side facing me in the next bed over.
"How are you doing?" I asked her.
Peyton smiled warmly. "Good. A bit bummed to be the only person that's single, though."
"Don't worry. There will be someone new in the next few days," I said. "It's Love Island. We could get another islander in the middle of the night."
Peyton giggled, clutching the blankets around her shoulders. "I wish!" She nestled into her pillow as the lights began to dim. "Goodnight, Maddie."
"Goodnight."
-
Eight hours later, the villa lights enveloped the room in blinding brightness, and the curtains were pulled back using electronic panels. It was time to make content for America. I slid out of bed and began my morning routine in the bathroom: washing my face and brushing my teeth. It was symbolic of a clean slate that I enjoyed visualizing every day. With my hygiene satisfactory, I made my way to my wardrobe and found some new outfits courtesy of Love Island's clothing brand partnerships. Among the articles was a new bikini set. The top was a white ruffled halter, and the bottoms were white with green leaves wrapped around the fabric. I pulled it from the hanger and threw it on in the bathroom.
When I stepped out, Polly was sitting at her vanity, brushing through her hair.
"Maddie! That is so cute," she looked at me in the reflection of her mirror, then swirled around on her vanity stool and walked to her closet. "Wow! A restock!"
"Yeah, we can't look like we're trapped on an island without the ability to shop!" I joked and approached one of the floor-to-ceiling mirrors. "It's doing some miracle work for my chest." I made a show of pressing my boobs together to make them appear larger.
Polly let out a squeaky giggle as she watched me. "That's me every morning." She flipped through her new clothes and pulled out a light pink bikini with gold detailing. "They really understand my taste."
"You do look amazing in pink," I commented.
Polly held her hand over her heart. "Thank you! That means so much."
Giselle and Katrina walked into the room together. "I don't understand why we have to wake up so early," Giselle complained.
Katrina looked unbothered by the early mornings. "It's good for you! Time is a social construct. Our bodies are designed to go to sleep at sunset and wake up at sunrise."
Giselle scoffed. "Sometimes I don't get finished with work until sunrise. I work in the music industry, and when you work with big popstars, you run the booth on their schedule. If Ariana Grande wants to come in and record a song at 2 in the morning right before she leaves for a tour, our asses are in the studio."
"Fair," Katrina shrugged. "I just know how good I feel when I wake up right when the sun does. And I get to hear the birds singing, and the rest of the city is still sleeping, so the streets are quiet apart from a few commuters." Katrina's smile began to falter. "I'm feeling a little homesick. I miss living in a big city."
"That's okay, girl. I get you. It was hard for me to fall asleep the first few nights without the sound of traffic and car horns. And the ambulances and police. It's so quiet here." Giselle looked thoughtfully for a moment, then turned to me. "Where'd you say you were from, Maddie?"
"Indianapolis, but I'm not so attached to it. Honestly, the villa kind of reminds me of Hawaii. I mean, biologically they're similar since they're both in the Pacific and are about equal distance from the equator. It's comforting," I said. I reached into my closet and slid my arms into a see-through black coverup. It hung weightlessly across my shoulders.
I made my way downstairs and caught up with Peach for breakfast. We filled our plates with bacon, fruit, and scrambled eggs then went to take a seat in the garden. The morning was drastically cooler than the day before, and it was tolerable to be outside without being in the pool.
"So, what's your next move?" Peach asked as she spooned some pineapple into her mouth.
I shot a glance at the villa doors. "I'll wait and see what happens, I guess. I'm still interested in Noah, but if he loses interest, I'll have to wait and move on."
She nodded at my response and watched her plate as she poked at the fruit. "Does anyone else in the villa catch your eye?"
"No." I took a bite of my scrambled eggs. "There's just no one really here for me."
"But have you gotten to really know everyone? Or are you just stepping aside because you don't want to hurt any of your friends?" Peach asked.
I went through the list of guys in my head before saying them out loud. "Michael's not my type; too muscular. Eli's nice, but I really only see him as a friend. Charlie's also nice, but definitely just a friend. And Lucas... I guess I don't know much about Lucas."
"Ding!" Peach yelled. "That's an option. Just don't count anyone out yet, okay?"
Lucas poked his head out of the villa. "Ding? Did your phone go off?"
Peach looked back, surprised. "Oh, no, sorry!" She called. Lucas disappeared inside the villa. "Close one."
"I'm not sure about getting to know Lucas," I revealed. "It doesn't feel right."
"Well, does it feel wrong?"
It took me a while to realize what she meant. "Well, no, but-"
"But nothing. Polly and Lucas are just friends. I'm sure if you brought it up to Polly, she'd understand. She's matured a lot! I'm not saying you have to get married, but you should talk to him and make sure you're not missing out on anything there," Peach said.
My stomach began to turn. "I don't know," I said, feeling uncomfortable.
Peach looked over, watching me squirm beneath the pressure. "Maddie, calm down. Is this a loyalty thing? You're not coupled up with Noah. You don't owe him anything."
"But I'd like to be coupled up with Noah, and I don't want him to think I've changed my mind if he sees me talking to another guy," I said.
Peach reached over and held my face in her hand. "He's literally coupled up with another girl right now."
"Involuntarily," I interjected.
Peach laughed as she let herself fall backward on the seat. "You are ridiculous." She sat her plate down on the cushion beside her. "You promise me you'll at least try?"
I looked over at the villa, buzzing with life and breakfast. "I'll try."