Today's the day. The day Hardin and my relationship becomes legal in the state of New York. I won't have to testify against him in court, I would be considered immediate family if he's ever in the hospital, and I'd call him my husband. As I sit here at the kitchen counter of Nora's house, I remember how much I wanted this once, how much I wanted commitment with him. Then, it just flipped like a switch. What he did to me in England really opened my eyes to how volatile Hardin was, and I just couldn't imagine ever marrying him after that. Especially since I found out my parents were never married too. Now, here I am, about to marry my best friend, the love of my life, and my soulmate.
"Good morning, bride!" Nora comes downstairs into the kitchen, freshly showered.
"Hey." I sit at her kitchen counter, and continue to drink my decaf coffee.
"How are you feeling!? Today is actually the day!"
"I feel good. I'm ready for this." I tell her, more convincing myself than her.
"It's okay to be nervous, Tessa."
"It's not that I'm nervous, I just don't want things between us to change. That's what always happens. Marriage is a big step; I just don't want it to overwhelm Hardin and cause issues between us."
"I was worried with Landon too, that things would change between us because we were getting married so quickly and so young, but you and Hardin are soulmates. There is nothing you and him can't get through."
She's right, I know she is. "Thanks, Nora."
"Well, I think we are heading over to Kim's in about two hours to do your hair and makeup, also she has your dress. I can't wait to see how amazing you look once you have everything done!"
Nora and I talk about how I want my hair and makeup done for another twenty minutes before Landon eventually comes downstairs, carrying his daughter.
"Hey, Tessa! Today's the big day!"
"Yep." I smile back. "Are you heading over to my house?"
"Well, someone has to help Hardin, so I guess I'm gonna be the one to do it." He shrugs, and I am so grateful for Landon and that he was able to develop such a strong relationship with his stepbrother.
"True."
"How is she?" Nora walks over to her daughter, touching her cheeks with the tip of her finger.
"She was a little fussy this morning, but I think she's okay now."
"That's good." She smiles down at her daughter.
"How are you doing? With the pregnancy and everything?" Landon asks.
"You know, most of the time I forget that I'm pregnant. I mean, I can't even tell. Besides the vomiting." I honestly say. "Hardin and I are going to an appointment sometime next week, so we'll see, but I feel good. My morning sickness has mostly gone away, so I guess that's a good sign."
"I can definitely tell." She walks over to me, pointing at my belly. "Doesn't that shirt feel a little tight?"
"Not really." It's one of Hardin's loose black shirts, so I wouldn't expect it to be too tight on me.
"Well, I notice it, and you're glowing."
"What time are you two heading over to Kim's hotel?" Landon interjects.
"Probably around noon, so in about two hours."
"Okay, I'll probably leave around the same time to go force Hardin into a suit with a tie."
"Good luck." I smile at him.
My nerves are eating me alive, and even though I am really excited to marry Hardin, I can't help the pit in my stomach that I'm feeling. It'll go away, it has to.
Two hours later, we are out the door heading to Kim's hotel. Nora brought Addy with her, and she won't stop crying in the back of the car.
"Are you sure you don't want me to drive so you can sit back there with her?"
"It's okay." Nora yells over Addy's screams. "She is probably just hungry. When Landon and I drive, usually one person sits in the back with her."
"I can sit in the back if you want."
"Are you sure?" Nora asks.
"Yeah, of course." I get into the back seat and sit down. Her face is all red from crying, and her tiny mouth is open.
"Here. Give her this." She hands me a stuffed animal. "She sleeps next to it, so it'll calm her down."
I take the stuffed animal, and hold it up to a wailing Addy.
"Look Addy, a stuffed elephant!"
"Mr. Elephant." Nora says.
"Okay... Mr. Elephant!" I say with a smile on my face. I wave the thing around. I take the little trunk of the elephant and rub it against Addy's arm. Her eyes open at the touch of the elephant. She is still whining, but her screaming has stopped.
I continue to wiggle the elephant in front of her, making some fake animal sounds to go along with it.
"It's working. Nice job, Tessa." Nora says from the driver's seat.
I put the elephant down for a split second, and Addy starts to wail yet again.
"Okay, okay." I wiggle the elephant stuffed animal in her face to cease her crying.
This is gonna be me. In six or less months, I am going to have a baby of my own who I'm going to have to comfort. It's heartwarming, exciting, and terrifying all at the same time. When I was little, I had a tiny stuffed bear that I would sleep with every night. I like how Nora and Landon find something that gives Addy so much peace.
"Wedding day, Ahhhh!" Kim yells as she opens the door to her hotel. "I'm so excited!"
"I'm gonna feed her quickly while you two get situated." Nora excuses herself to the bathroom so she can breastfeed Addy.
"Come, come, let's get you ready!" She pulls me over to a chair by the large window, where the sun is shining super bright.
"Sorry, natural light helps with making sure the makeup looks good, but you can keep your eyes closed." She smiles at me. "So what were you looking for?"
"I don't know, something natural. I don't want it to look too cakey, you know? Hardin doesn't even like when I wear makeup, so I want it to be very minimalistic."
"I get it. Well, maybe we'll do some nice pinks and browns to help bring out your eyes."
"I trust you, Kim. Whatever you think will look good. Where's Christian?"
"He's getting ready to head over to Hardin's to make sure he's on time with getting ready and stuff. Vance is wondering though, who's gonna walk him up to the altar?"
Oh shit. I didn't even think of that. His mum is the obvious choice, but Ken or Vance is the more complicated decision. I don't think Hardin is gonna walk up with anyone, considering that the relationship with all three of his parents is kind of rocky. I don't know though.
"I have no idea, he'll have to discuss that with Hardin. It's ultimately his decision of whether or not he wants to have people walk him up to the altar. Considering that no more than twenty five people will be at this wedding, I don't think it's necessary."
"Hey guys. I don't think Addy is feeling very well, I think she needs rest. Can you uber there?" Nora pops her head into the room.
"Of course, that's fine." Kim sulks at the idea of Addy being sick.
"Oh, okay." I sigh as well. I want Nora to be here with me as I get ready, but if Addy is sick, that is obviously first priority. She grabs her bag holding her dress and heads out the door with Addy in haste.
"Poor Addy. I hope she's alright." I look to Kim, who holds a small smile. Why is she smiling, hearing about Addy possibly being sick?
"Yeah, I think she'll be okay."
"Why are you smiling?" I ask, and she immediately stiffens up, and coughs.
"I wasn't... I was just thinking about how good you're gonna look with this makeup."
Something is up with her reaction, but I have too many more problems to worry about than why Kim has this goofy grin on her face.
Kim refuses to let me see my makeup and hair until it's completely done, but the anticipation is killing me. I rarely, if ever, get super excited to get my hair and makeup done. I think the last time I got it done was for Landon and Nora's wedding, and that was four years ago. My eyes are burning from the sun in my eyes, so I can't even open them long enough to see anything.
"I'm almost done." Kim tells me as she finishes putting the last few bobby pins in my hair.
"Who knew it would take two hours to do all of this makeup and hair stuff."
"I'm a little rusty with hair stuff, so I had to start over a couple times, but I finally got it."
Kim's phone buzzes on the table, and she places a bobby pin her mouth so she can pick it up.
"It's Christian, telling me that he got Hardin to wear a suit and tie."
"Really!" I nearly choke on the air I was breathing in. In all the years we've been together, I have never seen Hardin wear a tie. Ever. Not to any event, any wedding, any funeral, never. The mention of Hardin gets my stomach tied in knots again. Imagining him in a suit and tie, hair slicked back, nice shoes on... it makes me feel all warm inside. I love his style, but when Hardin dresses up it's a whole other type of smoking hot.
"Tessa!" Kim snaps her fingers in front of my face, interrupting my daydream of Hardin in a suit. "Close your eyes, I just need to fix something."
"Sorry." I apologize before shutting my eyes.
After what felt like hours of sitting in this chair, Kim tells me that my hair and makeup are done. She grabs my hand and pulls me to the bedroom, begging me not to peek until I have my dress on. I take off my clothes, just leaving me in a bra and panties.
"Your stomach!" She smiles and pads across her and Christian's bedroom towards me. "You can see the bump even more now!"
"Kim, you literally saw me yesterday..." I think she is exaggerating about how noticeable my stomach is.
"Well, that was with clothes on, not just bare and everything. It's beautiful isn't it? The fact that you are making a life in your own body."
When I don't respond, Kim claps her hands together. "Okay, well let's get this dress on."
She helps me step into the dress, pulls it up my body and begins to button the bottom of the dress. I forgot how exposed my back is wearing this dress.
"Okay, one last thing." She takes the charm bracelet that Hardin gave me and puts it around my wrist.
"How did you get that!?" I ask her.
"I had Christian swipe it yesterday when he went to go talk to Trish in your bedroom. I just wanted to make sure that you wear it because it means a lot to both of you."
It was sweet of Kim to think of that because I don't think I would've remembered to wear it since I have so much on my mind.
"How are you two with that whole... thing?"
Talking about Trish with Kim is always a sensitive topic, but after last night, I think it's important that I make sure Kim is okay.
"It's fine. He feels more closure after they talked, so I guess that's a good thing." She shrugs, and I can tell she is trying so hard to act more okay than she actually feels. "Enough about me though, are you ready to see yourself? Eyes closed!" Kim cheers.
I nervously nod as Kim leads me to the full length mirror that's in the bathroom.
Kim places me in front of this mirror, and steps away. "Okay open your eyes."