"You don't want me, daddy? You don't want me to ride you?"
Yes, I'm horny af. I just couldn't stop it. I dont know if it's the drug or if it's just him and his looks. I have this huge urge to be with him, have him inside me, or at least be so close so that our bare skin be touching in so many intimate ways.
Or maybe I'm just a horny bitch on drugs with a huge urge to be fuck out of existence by Cristian Conner.
Yes, or that.
"Truth, you really should stop testing me," Cris said, putting all his concentration on the road ahead.
"But daddy..." I whined pulling my skirt down and grabbing his hand to bring it closer to my now wet center.
"Truth, of course, I want you..." He started saying taking a deep breath " you really don't know how much," he whispered taking a turn to enter his luxurious estate "but I'm driving, you are hurt and on some type of freaky drug. Now is really not the time, baby girl," he finished his sentence by tapping my thigh three times and retrieving his hand.
"Fine, I'm sorry." I sighed in defeat knowing very well that he was right.
Watching the gigantic houses pass by in a blur I question myself and my sanity.
Was I really a horny whore all this time? Or was I having this effect because of all the time I was spending with Conner?
I mean, I don't recognize my old self.
I was so quiet in my own social circle. No sexual activity of any kind. No dress-up. No faking smile to intimate someone. My life has been kind of crazy.
I really was acting so sweat to just make a pretty girl jealous and take my claim. It makes me laugh thinking about it. I would still do it again though, but this time I wouldn't push him away. I would give him the most passionate and sloppiest kisses humankind has ever seen.
Damn it, I should have done that.
"I really am sorry," I said, cutting the tensed up silence in the car.
"Baby girl, its okay" he replied grabbing my hand in his and smiling sideways at me.
"About Marisa," I said looking down at our hands.
His hand was so big and warm compared to mine.
"It's okay if she thinks I am a heartless fake bitch. Who cares what she thinks?" I said once again when he didn't respond back.
She doesn't know me and she will never take the time to do so. So why would I care about what she thought of me?
She wants Conner? She can try and take him. It doesn't mean that she will succeed. Once I confess he will stay by my side.
Don't get your hopes up.
Be positive. He is here now, he might stay with me once this is all over
He doesn't do relationship
I'm still going to confess.
"You are not heartless nor a bitch." He said sighing
"What about fake?" I quickly said once the word rang inside my head.
If I'm not mistaken that's exactly what she said that I was. A 'bit fake'. Yes, I was being fake but only because she tried to put her paws on my man.
"You were acting fake-ish but no, you are not fake either," He said what I was thinking.
"I wouldn't be acting fake-ish if you would've just told me that you decided to befriend her... OR! If you would've just told her that you have a girlfriend."
"Here we go again..." He mumbled under his breath rolling his eyes at me. Reaching our destination, Cris stopped his car in front of his house and turn to me.
"I mean seriously! Do you really want me to look like another one of your whores?!" I asked him in a desperate need to know.
"You are not a whore." He replied firmly
"I know that! BUT THEY DON'T! If only you could hear what the say about me." I'm going to act as if my little horny stunt didn't happen because that was just me on my high.
Yea, baby girl, that's what that was.
I guess the talks do affect me. I try to act as if they don't but this is Conner's reputation we are talking about. His the next best thing next to my brother.
"You need to ignore them then!" He screamed agitated with the topic.
"It's easy for you to say! I should be your girlfriend not your whore! And she and everybody should know that!" I yelled back at him.
"But you're not!"
Once he yelled that the car stayed silent. I didn't know where to hide. Where to put my head. It was embarrassing and humiliating.
My heart dropped to my stomach knowing what was going to happen next.
"You're not my girlfriend, your not my whore, " he mumbled, killing the engine completely and letting out a sigh
Sometimes I really want to know what was going on inside his head. What was he thinking? But then I thinking it's best to reserve the heartbreak for another time.
"Yea, you are right, " I whispered fumbling with the end of my skirt and looking at out the wind to avoid his stare.
He is right
Of course, he is, for now.
I got caught up with this fake thing
Maybe it isn't a good idea to confess. Everything could seriously go wrong.
I'm not letting you back down now, take your man!
"Here, wear my jacket," he said breaking the extreme tensed up silence once he saw the goosebumps on my skin. I need to be alone right now and yet I knew that was not going to happen. Not any time soon at least.
"I'm fine, " I mumbled looking down at my hand and shaking my head.
"We had a deal," he said grabbing his jacket from the back seat where he threw it once he entered the car.
"Did you enter your clases?" I asked
"I was on the third period when I got a call from Layla saying you were in the nurses' office with your brother already on the way, " he said nodding his head at my question.
"Then fine."
I grabbed Cris' jacket from his hands and wrapped it around my body
"We are here, " he said again looking out the window to his house
"I can see that, " I said back at him trying to master all the anger and frustration on one single sentence
"Mom wants to talk to you." He said taking me by surprise.
"I have a broken hand, a fucking headache, and I'm hungry and you want me to talk to your mom now!" I said in disbelief. He can't be serious about that.
"I know, I know but she won't leave until she talks to you."
"You making me suffer because you want to be left alone?" I asked finally looking at him. I was still stunned by his selfishness.
"You are right. I'm sorry" he quickly said once he acknowledged the whole situation.
He opened the car door and got out. I step out of the car too, closing the door behind me. I looked at my car that was parked in front of his. I saw Cris walk to the driver side of my car and opened the door. I signed giving up the fighting angry girl front
I knew how uncomfortable Cris feels every time his parents came to visit him. He hated seeing them come home to just go on the same day.
Throughout the year he pushed them away. I think he feels like they are strangers staying at his house.
Here he is worrying about if I'm cold and taking me to the hospital.
And yet on the other hand he accepted the bet. He said yes to hump and dump me.
Yet he also said yes to my deal to play Candal.
He actually said that we were nothing. Right about now breaking my heart once again.
But he took you out on your first date. And it was pretty fucking perfect.
These pros and cons really aren't working out well for me.
"Come on we need to get you to the hospital before the drug loses its effects, " he said getting inside the car. "Truth what are you waiting for? " he added once he saw that I wasn't walking towards my car
"Get out of my car," I said firmly.
"You are not driving." He said getting out of the vehicle.
"Get out of the fucking car before I regret it," I said again crossing my arms and walking towards the mansion.
"Truth..." He called behind me with a question inside his eyes.
"New rule! If you say my name you will have to kiss me and second get out of the fucking car and open your fucking door!" I said stopping at his front door and turning to where the car was parked at. I'm sincerely getting sick of him calling my name for everything.
It gets me horny and right now I'm furious with him. It was not the time.
"What...?" He asked confused at the situation.
"We have to make this quick the medicine is wearing off and my hand has a pulse of its own," I said waiting for him on the front porch.
He slammed the car door and ran towards me with his keys on his hand
"Okay, fine... Thank you, " he whispered and smile at me, opening the door for us to enter.
"Whatever, " I mumbled hearing the door shut behind us.
"Truth! Cris, you're early. Honey what happen to you." Mrs. Conner appeared in front of us looking worried at my broken hand.
"Hi, Mrs. Conner! A door."
I tried to put my fakest smile yet. If you thought that the fake smile I threw at Marisa a couple of hours ago was legit this one was out of this world.
"Stupid door, did you got it check out?" She asked taking my arm and observing the color on it.
"No, we were on our way to the hospital not but we are pretty sure it's broken, " I said nodding to confirm it.
"Oh, that's horrible. Cristian why the hell did you bring her here!" She looked at him in horror
Same mama. Your son is a stupid selfish asshole. That's the reason we are here.
"Mother, don't start a fight now, " Cris said passing us by heading toward the living room.
"It's okay Mrs. Conner I'm under medication to relieve the pain. I came because Cris told me you wanted to talk to me. I insisted he brought me here, " I lied for him. I hated it!
"Oh honey, nonsense go to the hospital. Our talk can wait," She said shaking her head.
"It's okay, I prefer the distraction, " I respond walking to where Cris was with Mrs. Conner right behind me.
"Then sit, sit here. I'll make you a special tea of mine that will help you with the pain." She said punching me on the sofa and smiling down on me.
"Okay, thank you, Mrs. Conner," I said watching her leave the living room.
"Trut-"
"Shut up. New rules" I said instantly dropping the smile.
"I think mom's right we should get going, " he said getting up from the love seat.
"It's my hand, I decided what to do," I say not following his lead.
"Good to see you're back" he muttered sitting back.
"Do you really meant it?" I said think about our discussion in the car. "I mean I know we ar... W-what I'm trying t-to say is that..." I stumbled on my words not knowing how to say it exactly.
"I know we are not dating, I know your not my boyfriend, and I know everything is f--- part of the deal." I rushed out looking at the ground.
"Trut-" he interrupted me by saying my name.
"New rule! You really are bad with rules" I said rolling my eyes, saying stupid stuff because of my nervousness. "Look I know this deal, you don't have to keep bringing it up." I finally said.
I didn't want to say that exactly. But if I had said what I wanted to say he would catch up about my feelings and right now it was not the time nor place.
"Can I kiss you? I need to say your name two to three times in what I'm about to tell you." His question surprise me enough to take my eyes from the floor and place them on him.
"Not in your mothers home!" I said embarrassed and looking at the door in case his mother heard that.
"It's mine too, and it's not like we haven't kiss here."
Yes, we had, and they were pretty awesome. But his mother is in the room next to us. She could walk in ant min...
"Okay, here you go, sweety. How do you feel? Do you think you need more medicine? I think I have-"
And there she is. Always so sweet and caring.
"Mrs. Conner, I'm fine. I'm in no pain, " I said lying to her again so she would feel guilty "but thanks for this tea." I added grabbing the cup from his hands.
"Okay, great! That's good." She said nodding and with a big smile.
"Yea it is. What is it that you wanted to talk about?" I asked her moving to the side to give her space to sit down.
"Cristian," She said sitting down
One word, one name and she had my heart beating 200 mph.
"Mother," Cris said in a warning tone.
"I'm not talking to you, just about you. Don't interfere." Mrs. Conner said with sass not even looking at her son.
"What about Cristian, Mrs.Conner?" I finally grew my son courage to ask.
"I know he can be very difficult, " she started looking at me with sincerity in her eyes.
"Very, " I added in a low voice not meant for her to hear.
"Yes, very difficult. He can be arrogant and selfish and a... Fuck boy."
Once she said the last words, my whole body went into shock. I was not expecting to hear her say that.
"Yes, I know this, " I said nodding trying to look calm while hiding my surprise.
"Then why are you with him."
Seriously this woman can be blunt!
"Because he is also gentle, and sweet, caring, and can be a goof..." I said, placing the cup on the living room table. "Only when he wants to be." I added remembering every moment this past two weeks "And because he is Cris."
Somehow the silly little crush I had all those years went away. I never knew the real him back then, but I do know him now. This feeling I have for him is way bigger and indescribable.
"I think is sweet that you can talk about my Cris like that even though knowing all his flaws but you apparently see what other people can't."
I couldn't look at him after I said all those things. The blush was all over my body by now and uncontrollable.
"I've been paying a lot of attention," I said nodding slowly not know what to say.
"Mom, can we talk-" Cris again interrupted our talk.
"No, don't talk. I will talk with you when I'm done talking with Truth," She said rolling her eyes at him.
"Umm... Mrs.Conner? Where is this going?"
"Don't give up on him. He thinks that he doesn't need anybody and he might say and do stupid stuff to push the person away"
"Mom!"
"But you and I both know that he does need us and so I'm telling you this. Don't give up on him."
"I will try to not give up on him," I said nodding my head and looking at Cris with a small smile.
This is uncomfortable.
"Great! Good, thank you." She said in a happy tone knowing very well that I was going to stay with his son even if he doesn't want me anymore.
"No thanks needed" I whispered, siping the rest of the tea try to not feel as uncomfortable as I should.
"This is ridiculous I'm right here!" Cris said getting up from the love seat.
"We know." We both said nodding out head.
"Then, can we stop talking about this?"
"No. Now it's your turn" Mrs. Conner said firmly turning around to look at him.
"No," Cris said shaking his head.
"Yes!"
"I said no, leave my relationship alone. Don't talk, don't suggest, don't do anything, do not interfere with what Truth and I have."
"This is Truth we are talking about!" His mother said getting agitated with Cris. She got up from the couch looking at him straight in the eyes.
She was probably my hight, meaning Conner was taller and bigger than her but she looked fierce and unstoppable beside him.
"I know!" Cris said irritated that the conversation was still going even after this long.
"Then don't be you right now. Sit and talk with me," She said firmly pointing behind him at the couch.
"I said no!" He said back with the dams firmness.
"Is Truth another one of your toys?"
Why would she ask that? Why would she talk about that in front of me? Maybe she knows something. Maybe I'm just over exaggerating the situation. Maybe I was a toy to him.
This is a way for awkward for me. The tension and resentment they got between them is getting the best of me. I should really not be here.
Cris looks towards me with intense eyes. The bitterness he held for his mother clear in his eyes, yet once they looked at me they softened.
I looked down once he didn't respond to his mother question. Maybe yes, I was his toy of the month.
"No! She is Truth! I'm not talking about this with you," He said once I averted my eyes from his.
He whispered the last part giving up the fight and sitting down.
"Make this fast, I need to take Santana to te hospital, " he said once again with a stone-cold mask.
"I know about your ways. I might not be around as much as I like but I do know about your conquest,"
"I never tried to hide it and let's be clear mother you are never here... At all."
" I know. If you are going to play Truth like all the girl you've slept with leave her now, " she said
Thanks... Really Mrs. Conner, thanks now you are going to scare him away.
"That's not going to happen. Don't even suggest that, " he said glaring at his mother
"Then... Take care of her. Let her be your only from now on." She said nodding at him
He never responded to that. Mrs. Conner left the room, leaving behind an awkward tension between us.
By now I was a hundred percent sure the medicine was out of my system. The pain from my hand getting the best of me and yet I tried not to show it.
"Cris" I whizzed out once I knew that I could hold out any more
"Truth leave it alone," he said getting up from the love seat with a defeated look on his face.
We will talk about what we said another time or never if I was lucky enough to get away with it.
"Cris just listen to m-"
"Leave it alone. Ignore my mother," he said
"Cris! Take me to the hospital. My hand is actually killing me," I finally yelled at him holding my arm to my chest.
"Shit!" He looked at me in panic, remembering the bigger picture "Let's go," he said taking the keys from the table.
"Wait! Wait. Oh shit it hurts"
Once I got up a huge paint courses through my hand, arm, and chest making me dizzy
"Truth we need to go now, " he said looking at me with worry.
"Give me a moment to breathe bitch" I rushed out not meaning it. "Oh my God, I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry I didn't mean it"
"Well who knew my angelic baby girl could be a little mean," he said smirking at my actions and words.
"Apparently Mari-"
"No time for that talk, babe," he quickly grabbed me princess style and rushed out the door.
"Wait no! Put me down!" I said trying to get out of his hold, feeling useless
"Let me be your hero, " he said getting closer to my car.
"No! Put me down I can walk"
I hated feeling like a damsel in distress. It was not at all what I represent.
"Babe..." Cris said in a stern voice.
"Cris put me down please, " I said yet it was too late he was already opening the passenger door.
"Babe, let me do this for you, " He put me inside and looked me right in the eyes. I nodded in surrendering. He quickly put the seatbelt on and ran to the other side of the car.
"It hurts so much" I whined trying to stop the tears from falling down.
"Baby girl, I'm so sorry," he said rushing through the light traffic.
"Shut up and drive!" I yelled at him "Sorry, sorry!" I whispered looking out the window when the first tear escaped my eyes.
"Tell me from 1 to 10, how much does it hurt?" He asked looking at me then at the road in panic.
"A solid fucking 100."
"We are almost there! Just wait a bit baby" he said grabbing my other hand and squeezing it lightly to bring me a bit comfort.
"My food! I want food," I cried not knowing what was wrong with me. "you promised food," I just could hold the tears back.
"Yes, I know" he whispered entering the hospital parking lot in a hurry.
"It hurts, it hurts so much."
"This is all my fault and I'm so sorry."
"Shut up, it is your fault. But it was also mine. So you just shut up and get me inside that stupid fucking hospital."
"We are here, we are here." He said scrambling to open his door. Once he saw that I was doing the same thing he ordered me to stay inside the car.
"I can walk, " I responded in annoyance
"Stay, " he commanded get out of the car and opening my door
"I'm not a fucking dog, asshole!" I screamed when he was unbuckling me.
"You don't need to scream, I'm right here." He said holding his ear.
"I know that!" I screamed again.
He took me out of the car and ran to the electric door of the hospital. He sat me down on one of the chairs in the waiting room.
"Wait here let me get someone," he said kissing my forehead and rushing to the receptionists.
I love him, I really do. He might not love me but I'm positive that he cares for me. It was very clear. Maybe it was time to tell him how I really felt. Screw the special moment, anytime is special. I realized that I've been pushing it fearing how he might react but what I feel for his is something special.
Who knows maybe he feels the same way.
Feeling are so hard.
This is Cris. My first crush, my first lap dance, my first kiss, my first love, my first many things. It shouldn't be this hard to confess. It shouldn't have taken me this long to do it.
If he doesn't feel the same?
Then we wait. We wait until he does.
What if he never does?
Then I'll try to move on. At least I knew I gave it my all.
I waited on this uncomfortable, frozen chair that it should apparently helps with posture, and yet I felt like I was being tortured.
Cris can back after a couple of minutes.
"Babe, we need to wait for a moment. They will come and find us." He said nodding his head. I saw the conflict inside his eyes while he looked at the direction of the big wooden doors that led to the inside of the hospital.
"Can they give me something for the pain?" I asked
"I don't think so, but they will be here before you know it." He smile assuring me that everything was going to be okay.
"You owe me kisses."
"What?"
"When you argued with your mom you said my names a couple of times," I explained to him resting my head on his shoulder.
"Do you remember how many?" He asked out of nowhere draping his hand over me.
"No," I said moving closer to him.
"I guess I have to kiss you till you're satisfied." He whispered but not in a flirtatious, sexual way. I could hear the worry in his voice.
"Yea, I guess so" I whispered back to him.
Thirty-minute has passed and Cris was yelling at the nurse behind the reception without any sign of humiliation or remorse.
"Where the fuck is the doctor!" I could hear him yelled from my seat.
"Sir. You need to sit and wait to be called" The nurse while trying to reason with him.
"She is in pain! We've been here for more than half an hour, " he yelled bat at her.
"Sir, please be patient," she said in a calm voice
"She is in pain. She needs a doctor now!"
"A doctor will be with you shortly Sir but I need you to wait for them to call you."
"She doesn't have the fucking flu. She doesn't have a stomach ache! She has a broken hand!" Cris said turning towards me
"Sir, please calm down or I would be obligated to call security, " she said in a final tone.
"Cris, please stop screaming. Come sit down, please"
He came towards me and kneeled down in front of me.
"You need a doctor Tru-" he started saying.
"Kiss," I said in a low voice interrupting him.
"What?" He asked confused at the single word that slipped out of my mouth.
"Kiss me," I said louder, looking straight into his eyes.
"Now is definitely not the time" he quickly said with a roll of his eyes.
"You almost said my name. Kiss me, " I said like it was the most obvious and logical thing to demand in this type of situation.
"Truth."
I wrapped my good hand around his neck and pulled him closer to me to connect our lips. The butterflies spread all over my body calming me down instantly. Hoping that it had the same effect on him, I separated out short kiss and placed my forehead against his.
"Relax. I'm still here, I'm fine," I said with a small smile placed permanently on my face.
"You're in pain," he whispered causing our lips to brush against each other, creating bolts of energy to rush everywhere. This felt like peace.
"And I have to wait like everyone else," I said to him. Trying to calm him down enough to listen to me
"Truth-" he said again.
I pecked his lips and pulled away from him.
"Sit down, stop screaming at the nurses, and hold me," I said tapping the chair beside me.
He sighed surrendering to my petition. He sat down and grabbed my waist to bring me closer to him.
"Come here"
I leaned into the bus touch not getting bored about the warmth and the feeling of safety he provided.
I felt his heartbeat once I placed my hand on top of his chest. This definitely serenity, this undoubtedly home.
"Did you call my mother," I asked
"Yes, they should be here any second," he responded moving his hand up and down creating goosebumps and providing heat at the same time.
"What's taking them so long?" I asked wanting to be inside my mothers embrace.
"Your mother said something about you needing to be warm."
"She is bringing my blobby."
"Who?" He said stopping the movements.
"She bought me this fluffy huge blanket when I was about eight. By that time I was always getting sick so I was always in the hospital and I've never been a cold type person so every time I had to stay overnight I would stay up all night because of the cold. Mother bought me that blanket to keep me warm every time I was in the hospital."
"Well, that's pretty cute,"
I could feel his smirk already forming on his face.
This should embarrass me and yet I felt too comfortable to care.
I will surely regret it once I'm behind my soft sheets remembering this moment at three am in the morning.
"It wouldn't work at first. It was just too cold. The beds were always too cold. Until a period of time where I stopped being so sick. Mom was happy everything stop so she would stay with me every night and hug me to sleep with the blanket. The next time I was in the hospital she brought me the blanket and it felt like home. I could sleep through the cold because it felt like home." I finished my little humiliating story.
"Miss. Truth Santana?"
__________•__________
Authors Note
I'm sorry for taking a few hours. I didn't think I would write a long chapter but I wanted to fulfill my promise to you so I tried to rush up the process. So sorry for all the grammar errors.
This chapters not edited
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AMTA0206