The first thing, or rather, person, whom Tobirama sees when he opens his eyes is Hashirama. The older is sitting on the stool next to his bed, dark bags under his eyes and looking like he hasn't taken a bath for days. There's another stool next to where Hashirama is sitting on and Tobirama also notices some telltale signs that Mito had been in the room.
He opens his mouth to speak but before he could form a word, Hashirama had already thrown himself at him, effectively knocking the air out of his lungs. He groans in retaliation but when Hashirama doesn't budge, he lets him be. Hashirama adjusts slightly a few seconds later though, just to give him some room to breathe.
His senses come back gradually and he finally recognizes where they're at--in his own bedroom. He also recalls what happened before he got to this state--he's at the lab with Mito when his vision got blurry and all of a sudden, all he sees was black before he lost consciousness.
He remembers Mito, who probably was terrified because of the incident, and wishes she's here now, too. He wants to apologize to her for causing such trouble.
The feeling of wetness on his right shoulder, right where Hashirama's face is currently buried at, snaps him out of his thoughts.
Trust his older brother to be overly dramatic. Tobirama had just lost consciousness--he's not dead. If only he's not still feeling weak right now, he'd already roll his eyes at Hashirama.
"You're crying as if I'm dead, anija. Stop it," he says, but without any heat in his tone. Aside from his voice being hoarse and his throat feeling dry, he feels rested overall. The exhaustion in his eyes are gone now and his shoulders and back aren't aching anymore. All in all, he feels better than he did before that incident at the lab.
"Sorry," Hashirama says. The embrace tightens still, and athough it's getting harder to breathe again, the warmth that Tobirama feels in his chest feels so good that he can't bring himself to push Hashirama away. He's always told his older brother that he hates it when he hugs him, but now that he really thinks of it, Hashirama gives the warmest hugs there are. It's...nice.
"You slept for three days." Hashirama breaks away slowly. "How are you feeling right now?"
"Water," Tobirama winces as he answers. He opens his mouth to try and clarify what he meant but Hashirama is quick to pick up what he needs. He helps him to a glass of water and Tobirama downs it in one go.
"Mito told me about the jutsu that the two of you are working on," Hashirama says and Tobirama almost chokes on the water.
Hashirama isn't supposed to know about the jutsu until it's done.
"W-what jutsu?" Tobirama tries to feign innocence but miserably fails.
"Can I ask you a favor, Tobi?"
Tobirama looks at his brother's face before he gives him a reply. If Hashirama did already discover about the jutsu and who it is for, he'll certainly ask him to stop working on it because knowing his brother, he's likely blaming himself for what happened to him back at the lab.
Tobirama couldn't afford that. He wants to finish the jutsu for Hashirama.
"If you're gonna ask me to stop working on it, just stop already. I don't plan on stopping until it's done," he declares firmly.
"But Tobi, it's taking a toll on you. I don't like seeing you suffer."
"Anija," he insists, "once your memories of Madara return--"
Hashirama cuts him off suddenly, looking taken aback. "Wait, what do you mean?"
"Huh?" Tobirama's eyebrows contort, but realization hits him, hard, eventually. Hashirama doesn't know about the jutsu yet, does he? And Tobirama had just graciously spilled the beans, hadn't he?
"Tobirama, what do you mean?" Hashirama repeats.
Tobirama shuts his eyes and sighs. Given the situation he's currently at, he really has no choice but to tell Hashirama.
"Your memories of Madara aren't lost," he explains. "They're sealed. At least, that's what we know. Mito's the one who figured that out, by the way."
There's confusion in Hashirama's face. It's obvious that he's shocked to hear this. However, he doesn't say a word and only listens closely.
"Mito and I are working together to create a jutsu that will counter that sealing jutsu casted on you. At this point, we still don't know what really happened and more importantly, who used that jutsu against on you, but once we finish it and you regain your lost memories, there's a chance that we'll find out..." He pauses, looking Hashirama in the eye. "I want you to remember, anija. About Madara, about what happened and why he left."
As if on reflex, Hashirama grasps the pendant of his necklace. Whether he's conscious of this or not, Tobirama wouldn't know.
He waits for the older to say something but when he still doesn't, Tobirama adds, "I thought Mito has already told you. About it all."
Hashirama shakes his head, letting go of the necklace and putting his hand back on his lap. "No. She told me to ask you instead," he says calmly. "She respects your decision to keep it a secret from me."
It should be strange but Tobirama finds himself smiling fondly at the thought.
"Since when?" Hashirama asks.
The smile vanishes in an instant. Tobirama grits his teeth. No use in lying now. "I started working on it since the day you left the village to fight...him."
"...Three months and I didn't even have the slightest idea," Hashirama says monotonously, almost as if he's telling all of this to himself instead (probably because all of it hasn't sink in yet).
"I'm sorry, anija."
"What are you sorry for?" Hashirama lifts his head. He's smiling, amidst the tears that continuously fall from his eyes. "It's me, Tobirama. It's my fault. I'm sorry I didn't do anything. I'm sorry I've been too busy with my own problems that I didn't realize that you're overworking yourself because of me."
Tobirama hates seeing his older brother like this. He hates that Hashirama carries all the burden, all while blaming himself when the truth is that, it's not his fault. He just...loved the wrong person, is all.
"Anija."
"I'm sorry, Tobirama. I'm really sorry. You can stop now, you and Mito. I'll be alright. You don't have to worry about me anymore, okay? So please, don't overwork yourself again. I'm your older brother. I must be the one who takes care of you, not the other way around."
"But clearly, you're not okay, anija," Tobirama counters, and this causes Hashirama to avoid eye contact. Why must his older brother be so stubborn?
"I want to help you. Please, let me help you."
"I told you, Tobi," Hashirama says with an obviously forced laugh. "I'll be fine."
Tobirama's lips form a thin line. "Don't you...want to remember?" Because if Hashirama doesn't want to, there's no point in carrying on with the jutsu anymore.
For a long time, Hashirama doesn't answer.
-----
Of course, he wants to remember. He's spent countless hours thinking about how he lost his memories of Madara, all of those sleepless nights thinking about why he left.
Yes, of course. He wants to remember. But at what cost?
He sighs and watches as a ball of warm air comes out of his mouth as he exhales. Snow is falling tonight and it's even colder here at the top of the Hokage rock. Konoha is already asleep at this hour, the lights coming from the houses are already out and the only lights he can see from up here are the lamps in the streets.
It's been almost two weeks since Tobirama woke up. With the promise of not pushing himself and after so much convincing (and much, much, much thinking on Hashirama's side), Tobirama carried on with finishing the jutsu with Mito, but now with Hashirama's blessing and cooperation.
"Mito found out while I was asleep that it's the type of seal that we got wrong. The jutsu requires a special type of seal produced only in Uzushio. She asked Ashina-sama to send some and it's arriving today." Tobirama excitedly told him when he went to his office this morning. "We already got the correct formula so it should be ready by tomorrow."
Hashirama's face was blank when he gave him a simple nod as an answer.
He doesn't know how to feel about it, really. He's thankful that he has Tobirama and Mito by his side, who cares for him, even when he himself seemed to have forgotten to. He's a little bit excited, too, because finally, he's going to remember. However, he can't help but feel scared of what he'll discover once his memories return. Whatever those are, they won't change the fact that Madara has already left and taking back his memories of him now isn't going to bring him back either.
Hashirama decides to stay here just a little bit longer, allowing his thoughts about Madara to flood his mind once more and as he does, he prays that wherever Madara is right now, he's also looking at the same sky, safe and far away from all danger.
It's just wishful thinking, but a part of him hopes that Madara is thinking about him, too.
-----
Madara takes a sharp breath as he allows his body to relax, as much as his senses would allow. He's atop a tree in the middle of a forest near the border of the Land of Lightning. He'd fought a group of shinobi, and a couple more shinobi before that, just a few minutes ago.
It's getting harder and harder just to be out in the open these days. It's like every village, big and small, is after him, sending men after men to kill him. It's nothing new to him, of course. He'd been fighting other shinobi since the day after he left Konoha, and what's happening these days are no different--only their numbers increased and the territories he encounters them at.
But one is bound to get sick and tired of it all at some point. He's still adjusting on getting used to fighting with one eye, the other one being totally blind now. While he's convinced that he's still in top form, he's also aware that the precision and speed of his attacks have slightly dulled. Add that to the enormous amount of chakra that taming the Kyuubi requires. He has a lot of chakra reserves but it still needs to be replenished from time to time.
He's completely aware that he's classified as a rogue shinobi now. Konoha--or Hashirama, to be exact--has declared him as one. Madara learned so during the last time he stopped by a village. The truth is he already expected it, but what makes him wonder is the odd timing of the announcement. What happened exactly that prompted Hashirama to do so? Madara had expected it to happen much earlier, back when Hashirama came back to Konoha after they fought. Or even earlier than that--back when Madara left the village.
Now that he thinks of it, he started to encounter more and more enemies when he left Kirigakure. He learned of the Mizukage's assassination the day after that, but that's the extent of his knowledge on the matter. A whole month's worth of work, gone just like that. However, there's nothing he could do about it now but to move forward, find other ways to fulfill his plan.
The moon appears to be larger tonight. It also bleeds red, but that might just be due to the blood that splattered onto him earlier--including his eyes--which he only notices just now.
He brings a hand up on his face to wipe it off with his glove.
After a quick scan of the area and finding out that no one is going to bother him for at least the next hour, he finally deactivates his Sharingan and sits down on a tree branch. He needs to find a proper hideout soon, but with the nature of things happening as of late, looking for one will certainly take some time.
'Fuck, Hashirama. The things I do for you.'
(It terrifies him but it's his reality now.)
He rests his head against the trunk, closing his eyes as his breathing slowly evens out.
-----
"Ready?"
Hashirama nods, signaling Tobirama and Mito to start working on the jutsu. He's lying on a long table as the two worked.
The entire 'unsealing' procedure would last for at least three hours, as he's been told. Performing it is considerably not as dangerous as in some jutsu, but it's a rather complicated one that requires extreme focus and a steady amount of flowing chakra from those who will be executing it. It's due to this reason that they chose to do it during night time, here in Tobirama's lab room.
Tobirama also told Hashirama beforehand that he'll fall asleep in the middle of the procedure. "That way, your memories will come back to you as if you're dreaming."
Hashirama forced a smile then. 'A dream, huh?'
The two started and before long, there's a tingling sensation that Hashirama can feel in his chest. He looks up at Tobirama, who's fully concentrated on what he's doing. Hashirama also takes a look at Mito, who is equally absorbed. When Hashirama's stare lasts a second too long, Mito catches him looking at her and she gives him a small smile. Hashirama finds himself smiling, too. For real, this time.
Several minutes later and the sensation in his chest has become borderline painful. It's not long after that when he falls asleep.
-End of Chapter 16-
So I rewatched eps 367, 368, and 369, and was reminded of the fact that Madara awakened his Sharingan when he first said goodbye to Hashirama after he told him that their dream was impossible. I mean, separating from Hashirama really had a huge impact on him, huh.
Anyways, do comment and share your thoughts about this chapter, or the story, or anything ( ╹▽╹ )
-Cee
Oh, another thing. I know Izuna is a cutie but he's even more adorable when he was young! Ugh. Those cheeks looks so squishy asdfjfllk