I lied, yet again. Why can't I stop doing it? Am I addicted? Is it like a drug? When will I ever learn not to? Apparently, not today. When I told Tessa to go get my paper shredder from my office, I used that opportunity to switch the papers. The paper with the the true identity of my father is now sitting in my bedside table. My mind is so conflicted. I want to know who my real father is, yet at the same time, I don't want to face the reality. I have come to terms that Vance is my real father, but I can't help the small part of me that still believes Ken is, and once I see the results on the paper, I won't have to speculate any longer. I just don't think I can do it now, definitely not before both of them come over for Christmas dinner.
I collect myself and go out into the main room. Tessa's mum, sister and stepfather are the first to arrive, and she is showing her ring to them.
"Hardin!" Heather comes running over. "Tessa told me that she gave you my painting! Did you like it?" The enthusiasm in this girl astounds me.
"Yeah, I did. You are very talented." I compliment her, and she blushes.
"Thank you! I love the ring you got Tessa too!" She smiles so brightly. Even though they are not related in any way, Heather reminds me a lot of Tessa. Her bright spirit, and even brighter smile remind me of my soon to be wife.
"Thank you."
"Hi Hardin. How are you feeling?" Carol and David come walking over.
"I'm okay. The surgery went well, so now I am just healing."
"I'm sorry you two couldn't get married yesterday, but Tessa tells me that tomorrow you will be?"
"That's the plan, if one of us can stay out of the hospital for longer than a week." Tessa teases as she wraps her arm around my side.
"Yes... the sooner the better." Carol smiles, but it doesn't seem genuine. Her eyes are getting glassy, and it almost looks like she's about to cry.
"Excuse me." She walks quickly off.
"That was weird." I whisper to Tessa as she looks at her mother walking down the hallway. David goes to follow her down the hallway, but Tessa extends her arm out to stop him.
"I'll go." She offers, and follows her mother to the bathroom.
"Hardin, dear. Could you get me some soda from the cabinet? It's on the top shelf, and I can't reach." My mum comes walking in.
"I am not supposed to be stretching, Mum." I tell her, and she slaps her head.
"Of course, duh! I'll go find Mike."
"I'll do it." David offers, and my mum gives him an appreciative smile.
"Thank you." She walks off with David, leaving me alone with Tessa's stepsister.
"Is Smith coming?" She asks, sounding a little nervous.
"Yeah, he should be here soon."
"Good." She sits down on the couch, and begins twiddling her thumbs. She is more like Tessa than I even thought. I can read her emotions like a book.
"Smith is very fond of you." I tell her to help my little brother out. I know he likes her, and from the way she's acting now, I can tell the feeling is mutual.
"Really? He's fond of me?"
"Yeah. I think so."
She smiles as the doorbell rings again. I go to open it, nearly tripping over the rug we have in front of our door. It's Ken, Karen and Abby along with Nora, Landon, and their daughter.
"Come in." I extend my arm to invite them into my house.
"Where should I put this?" Nora asks, her hands filled with different desserts.
"In the kitchen."
"Addy!" Heather comes running over. "Landon, she's beautiful!"
"Thank you, Heather. Would you like to hold her?"
She nods enthusiastically, and Landon hands her to Heather. Heather goes onto the couch, talking baby talk.
"Hey." Landon says as he takes his coat off, and kicks the snow off his boots. "I'm gonna need a drink."
I follow Landon to the kitchen where he grabs a beer from the fridge. He avoids looking at his wife, who is just in front of him unloading all of the food into our fridge. When her and Karen leave without saying a word, I speak up.
"Trouble in paradise?" I nudge him, but he rolls his eyes.
"Just stupid stuff. Nora is working hours, and I mean so many hours, a week. She is not taking care of herself."
"What's with our woman and not taking care of themselves." I laugh, grabbing myself a beer as well.
"I don't know, man. Whenever I try to talk about it with her, she just creates an argument over it. I don't know if it's her parents that are pissing her off because they are giving her shit about Amir."
"Amir?"
"It's a long story, but he's a really good... friend... of Nora's who got into an accident a while back."
"Well, don't push her. If she wants to work, let her." I suggest.
"Oh, you're funny." Landon fake laughs, taking a larger sip of his Coors Light.
"What do you mean?"
"You hated when Tessa worked literally ten hour shifts at the Lookout, and you're gonna stand here and tell me if my wife wants to work like that after just giving birth, I should let her?"
I laugh at the fact that he's right. "Do as I say, not as I do." I use on of my favorite quotes I remember hearing in a movie.
"Whatever, I don't want to fight on Christmas, so I'm gonna go talk to her." He sighs, and walks out of the kitchen.
While I'm alone, my mind wanders to what Tessa is doing. She has been talking with her mother for a long time. I think Carol is emotional about her daughter getting married. At least, that's what I want to think. I don't want to think that after all this time, Carol is talking Tessa out of marrying me. Don't freak out, Hardin. Don't freak out.
"Excuse me, Hardin." David pulls me away from my paranoid thoughts. "I just have to grab a knife for the cheese Tessa put out."
"David, can I ask you something?" I blurt out, immediately regretting opening my mouth. I have had maybe a total of three conversations with David that have lasted longer than thirty seconds.
"Sure."
"You don't think Carol would try and talk Tessa out of marrying me, do you?" If anyone knows Carol and her intentions, it would be her husband.
"I don't think so, she never indicated to me that she was ever going to do that. Why do you ask?"
"Just being paranoid, I guess. Carol and Tessa have been in there for a while, talking and stuff."
"Oh, Carol..." He hesitates. His face holds a weird emotion that I can't quite tell what it is. "She's been emotional recently. So they are probably just catching up. Both of them have a lot of news to tell each other."
"You're probably right, thanks." I feel better now that David has told me he doesn't believe Carol is in the bathroom telling Tessa to leave me, but I'm wondering what news Carol has to share with Tessa. Before I can ask, David leaves the kitchen. I join everyone out in the main room? and it looks like a Christmas movie. I'm surprised my mum, Karen and Ken are talking, laughing even. Landon is sitting with Heather, his arm around Nora, so I assume they've made up. David is playing with Abby in the corner. I guess Christmas isn't too bad with family.
The doorbell rings once again, and I know it must be the Vance's, but when I open the door, I am blown away by who I see.
"Oh, Hardin. Hi." Noah smiles with his fiancé at his side. "Tessa invited us to Christmas since we are staying an extra day."
Tessa fucking invited Noah to Christmas. Just as I was thinking this was gonna be an okay day, Noah has to show up.
"Come on in." I invite them in.
"Thank you." Shannon smiles up at me. "We brought some pie and wine."
"You can put it in the kitchen, just around the corner on your left." I tell her, and she goes to the kitchen, leaving me with Noah.
"Where's Tessa?"
"Talking with Carol." I tell him. The awkward silence between us is so loud, it's deafening.
"Noah, hi." David walks over and shakes his hand. David knows Noah? Of course he does. He's still friendly with Carol.
"David, hi. How are you?" Noah and David begin engaging in conversation, and I use this opportunity to bolt. Everyone else is talking in conversations of their own, and I don't feel like walking up to any of them and pretending like I really care about what they're talking about. Where the fuck is Tessa and Carol?
Almost like I summoned her with my mind, Carol walks out into the main room towards her husband, without Tessa.
"Noah! What a surprise!" She walks over, and hugs him. "What are you doing here?"
"I was here for Tessa's wedding, so she invited Shannon and me since we were staying at a hotel alone on Christmas."
"Oh, how nice of her."
I walk up to Carol, David and Noah, and notice Carol's eyes are puffy and red. Her makeup is hiding most of it, but I can still tell.
"Where's Tessa?" Noah asks the question that I'm dying to know.
"In her bedroom." She looks up to me. "I would go in there." She whispers underneath her breath. My heart sinks.
What the hell did Carol tell Tessa? I guess I'm about to find out.