***Potential Trigger Warning***
The boys head upstairs and turn in. I try to fall asleep but I can't. I keep thinking about the shower. That voice. What it says is unsettling. I got to get my mind off of it. I grab the book from my bag and thumb through it, but it doesn't help for obvious reasons. So I lay in the dark on the couch, with a blanket to keep me covered and the light of the city gently illuminating the room. The city that's always moving. A city created by the avatar. A city that prides itself on "equality". What a joke. Nowadays, it's just a melting pot of scummy people from all corners of the world. Doesn't even matter if you're a bender or not. This place has truly failed the vision that Avatar Aang had envisioned this place to be. No one is equal here. That's been clearly pointed out by the Equalists. Now the city is in chaos.
Non-benders fight and chant for equality, but the Equalists want more. They want benders to feel the pain that they have been given over many, many years. They want revenge, not equality. I do see their point though. But, is it the right way to fight for what they want? Hurt only breeds more hurt. I mean, look at Amon. Fire benders killed his family, scared his face and he got no justice. Now, he has the power to cause harm to benders in a way he feels is equal to what happened to him. Is it the best way to go about changing the world so what happened to him doesn't happen again?
Then again, who am I to say? I'm a bender that is part of a bending triad that profits off of hurting others, not just non-benders. They extort non-benders more though to get what they want. But I personally never hurt a non-bender. From a non-bending perspective, I should be punished because I never took a step to tell my "family" to stop? Perhaps I should also be punished simply because I'm a bender too? Should I feel ashamed of who I am? I wish, as a whole, we can move past what has happened and treat everyone equally, regardless of where you come from and if you are a bender or not. Would that be unfair to those who were hurt? Is it simply impossible for everyone to not have prejudice against another group of people, even though it's not right? Is it simply human nature? It's just such a... larger than life issue. It's frustrating and mind boggling.
I think about the problem till I fall asleep. The next day, I think about it again. I ask Bolin what he thinks. He says he thinks everyone should be treated equally. Considering what we just went through, I'm surprised he can still one hundred percent state how he feels without any fear to cloud his judgement. It kinda gives me hope. When I asked Mako, his answer destroyed the optimism his brother created. He thinks everyone should be equal but doesn't believe it will ever come to pass. Someone will always want to feel more important or will take too much pride in one aspect about themselves and lord it over someone who doesn't have the same trait. It's a pessimistic answer but it might be true. Are equality and peace forever meant to be temporary and short lived? I don't know.
The next day, I decide to go outside to escape my mind thats going round and round about the Equalists. Mako also has errands to run in the city so we leave together. Bolins stays at the arena to work out in the gym. Mako and I walk down the pier and he worries about me walking around by myself while he runs his errand. I tell him I'm going to the hideout just to make sure everything is ok.
"Is that a good idea? With what just happened and all?" Mako asks while stopping our walk.
"Ya, it should be fine. The Equalists would be stupid to attack the same triad twice." I tell him. "Besides, the triad could be in disarray right now and I just want to check in."
"Are you sure about going back? You could leave and finally get out!" Mako says with mild desperation.
I think for a moment and shake my head. "I don't know, Mako."
"Come on, please? No one would blame you for wanting to leave. You were kidnapped. Plus, me and Bo wouldn't be worried about you if you got out."
Worried, huh? "Well, if that's the case, I'll go and tell them I'm leaving instead of hanging them out to dry."
Mako looks at me for a second. "I suppose you can't just send a letter?"
"They know where I live." I shrug. "It would just be best if I went in person."
"Alright." Mako exacerbates. "Be careful. I'll see you at home."
"Kay." With that, Mako and I part ways.
As I walk through the city streets, I must admit I'm a little on edge. I feel like someone is watching me, like I'm being spied on. When I arrive at the hideout, I find it abandoned. I walk in and almost everything is gone. It's eerily quiet. I open my office and all of my belongings are gone. My desk and chair, my radio, my files and my cabinets. Nothing left but the pale and blank walls. The sound of my sigh echoing off them. As I turn to leave, I see a piece of paper taped to the frame of the door at my eye level. How did I not see this walking in? I lift the paper from the frame and unfold it. Written on the paper is an address. This may be the new hideout location. It's within triad territory but it's still a long walk. I guess I can take a trolley halfway. I shove the note into my pocket, close my old office door and proceed to leave. As the doors of the hideout close behind me, I'm startled by a low and gruffy "Hey!" I swiftly turn and see a man leaning against the wall by the entrance of the hideout. I knew I was being watched! Just as I'm about to grab this guy's collar, he stops me. "You know where to go?"
"What?" I say confused.
"The new location." He looks around. "For the hideout."
"I...ya." I relax as I pull the note from my pocket.
"Good." Then he pushes himself off the wall, walks past me and heads down the street. I need to decompress. Not everyone is out to get me.
I catch a trolley and head to my destination. After finishing the last leg of my journey, I arrive at a building with a red door. I knock and a pair of eyes pear through a sliding slot before swiftly closing. The door opens and Shady Shin greets me. "Hey stranger. Good to see you alive and kicking."
"Hey." I say as I walk past him and cross the threshold of the door. "Did the new place have to be so out of the way?"
"I'm sorry princess." Shin closes the door and slowly walks up to me. "Do you need a royal foot massage?" Shin says with a creepy smile.
My stomach always churns when this man smiles. "Ew! What the hell man?"
"Relax. It was a joke." Shin rolls his eyes and walks past me.
"Where's Zolt? I need to talk to him about something."
"Zolts not the boss anymore. Viper is." He says over his shoulder.
I follow Shin around a corner and into a room. "Not surprised. That snake was just waiting for his chance."
"Now, is that any way to talk about me behind my back." Viper says catching me off guard as he sits in a throne-like chair.
I look around. The new place is more warm toned than the last, and the furniture is nice too. "So, what poor soul did you extort to get this place?" I ask with judgement.
Viper smiles. "A little shop owner over on fifth avenue. Don't worry, we asked nicely." Right. That just means he didn't directly hurt them. "Nice place, isn't it?"
I drag my fingers across the glossy surface of a table that's placed in the center of the room. I can see the reflection of the ceiling and the light fixture in its shine. I inhale and answer. "Sure." I look up at Viper. "Listen, I need my stuff from my office. Where is it?"
"It's here, don't worry. You don't have to come back today, you know. Although according to Shin, you got out scott free from the... incident." Viper says while folding his hands under his chin.
"I wouldn't call getting some low grade electrical burns 'getting out scott free'." I say as I lift my shirt to reveal the bandages that wrap around my abdomen.
Viper looks down. "Mmm, yes. But, you still have your bending."
"Right." I put down my shirt and look at Shin, who is lingering at Vipers side. "Sorry."
"But like I said, you don't have to come back today." Viper says, adjusting himself in his throne.
"About... that." I say, slightly hesitant.
Viper narrows his eyes. "What?"
"I don't... want to be in the triad anymore. I-I want to leave." I say nervously. Viper and Shin look at eachother, then Viper starts laughing hysterically. "What's so funny?"
"Oh, nothing. Go ahead. Pack up and leave. But do say hi to your new employer for me." Viper continues laughing and Shin slowly joins in.
I clench my fist with anger. "Why are you-"
"Seriously though. Where are you going to go? You going to go work in a restaurant bussing tables? Perhaps be a waitress in a cute little skirt? Work in a factory? Or maybe be a city worker? Oh wait, you can't."
"I can-"
"Face it, kid. You don't have any skills to speak of that could be in any way useful outside of the triad." Viper says with venom. He stands up and walks to me, stopping inches away before looking down at me. "Now, why don't you go home and rest up. Then come back tomorrow and get back to work."
I can feel my anger radiate off my skin as I lear at Viper. "Fine." I say before turning to leave.
"Ahem." Viper says as he grabs me tight by the arm and whips me around. He leans in close. "Is that how you're gonna address your new boss?"
I try to tug my arm out of his grip. "Let go of me Viper."
He squeezes my arm tighter, keeping me in place. "Answer me!"
His grip is starting to cut the circulation in my arm. I look up at him and through gritted teeth, I answer. "No... sir."
Viper smiles in a way I've never seen before. A smile that's worse than Shins. His eyes piercing me like the animal he calls himself after. He pushes me to the floor and stands over me. I look up at him and I feel an intangible coiling sensation rap around my body. It's cold and tight. "There ya go, kiddo." I get up cautiously and slowly back away before running out of the room. "See you later." Vipers voice echoes behind me followed by his cackling. I stubble around the corner and sprint down the hall. I fly out of the front door and slam it behind me.
I tangle my fingers into my hair as I linger on the empty street. "Fuck!" I say, kicking a trash can.
I end up on a bench in Republic City Park, fuming with frustration. That douche is right though. What can I do besides be in a gang? Damn it! I don't want to be in it anymore. I don't want to worry Bolin or Mako. My family, my real family. I sigh and let the tension out of my body. I sit on the bench for an hour, watching the people walk by like there's no problems in the world. Seeing their smiling faces puts me at ease. I try to copy their smiles and pretend like there's nothing wrong.
Just before dusk starts to blanket the sky, l leave the safe haven of the bench and I walk back to the arena. When I get back, Mako's already home. "Hey, how'd it go?" Mako asks.
Bolin, who's playing with Pabu, looks up. "How'd what go?"
"It uh.. It didn't go... at all." The smile I had walked in with had completely disappeared from my face.
"What happened?" Bolin asks in confusion.
Mako shakes his head. "She was going to leave the triad."
"Oh!" Bolin looks at me with surprise.
"What happened?" Mako asks.
I sit on the couch, running my hands over my face. "Viper basically said no."
"Viper? What's he got to do with it?" Mako asks.
"He's the new boss since Zolt lost his bending. He's kinda terrifying as the new boss."
"Why'd he say no?" Bolin asks as he scratches Pabus' head.
"Can we just drop it, please?" I ask as I lean my head back on the couch. "So, how'd your errand go, Mako?"
"Fine. I got a date tomorrow."
"WHAT?!" Bolin and I say in unison as I jolt up suddenly.
"Crazy right? This girl ran into me with her moped and is taking me out as an apology. We're going to Phong's Cuizine and I'm kinda nervous." Mako says.
"Look at you, mister ladies man." I say, teasingly.
"I wouldn't say that." Mako says, slightly embarrassed.
"Mhm." I smile. I look over at Bolin and he's thinking really hard about something. "What're you thinking about, Bolin?"
Bolin looks at me like I've just startled him. "OH! You're a girl! I could ask you!"
"Uh, Bo. I don't think-" Mako starts to say before he trails off.
"Ask me what?"
"When a guy likes a girl, what would the girl like as a gift?"
"I-" I hesitate. Is this some convoluted or round about way of asking me what I would like? I adjust my sitting position and turn to Bolin. "Well... sweets or flowers are always a good way to go." I respond, blushing a bit.
"Of course. Duh!" Bolin knocks his hand against his forehead. "Korra would totally like something like that. Also, super classy."
Korra... right. I should have known.
"I'll get her both. Totally over the top but why not?" Bolin says energetically.
"Right." I lean back against the couch.
"You think a rose would be a good choice?"
A rose, wow. "Ya. That'd be okay." After that, there's silence for a moment.
Mako stands up and breaks the silence. "Well, I'll start dinner. How does noodles sound?"
"Fine." I say. Damn. I can feel my emotions catching in my throat. "I'm going to go outside while I wait." I swifty leave the couch and run outside onto the dock. I pant and breathe the sea air into my lungs. I lift my shirt over my face and scream into the fabric, muffling the sound of my pain. I slowly sink into a sitting position with my legs dangling above the water. I uncover my face and wince at the pain in my chest as tears stream down my face. I cross my arms to grip the fabric of my shirt on my shoulders and pull tight as I lean over, trying so hard to squeeze out my emotions while simultaneously trying not to let them out for people to see. Damn it. Damn it damn it DAMN IT! "Screw ALL OF IT!" I shout while slamming my fists on the dock. When my fists hit the wood, the water from below flies upward like a wave fervently hitting a rock on a shoreline. I sit motionless with anguish in my heart, as the pain numbs my body.
Then, I hear footsteps approaching me from behind. I look up over the ocean, not bothering to see who it is, because I can take a guess as to who. "You ok?" Mako asks before sitting beside me on the edge.
"Ya." I say as I wipe tears from my face. "What made you think I wasn't?"
"Because the guy you like just asked you for advice on what gifts to give another girl." Mako says solemnly. "Also the water, when you got mad."
I give an empty laugh with an attempt to be sincere. I look at him with tears in my eyes before looking back at the water. "Is it that obvious?"
"To everyone except Bolin. He's not the best at this kind of thing."
"Ya." I sniff. "You don't think I haven't noticed?"
"I'm sorry (Y/N)." Mako says looking at me.
"I should have said something sooner." Tears start to fall down my face. I put my hand over my eyes as I quietly started to cry. Mako puts his arm around me and doesn't say a word more. He just comforts me as I cry myself out.
A/N: Hey gang. When I outlined this chapter in my head a few months ago (I work slowly like a roast in a crock pot, donrushmeh) the protest of the death of George Floyd and BLM protests was in full swing. While thinking about the universe of LoK, I made the connection between the motives of the Equalists and the motives for the BLM movement in the real world. While the Equalist are obviously more extreme, they both at their core want to be treated equally. It is a very unsettling comparison and that such an issue is present in a cartoon that is mainly for children but not explained is also partially unsettling. I was worried about presenting this connection and issue to you, my reader, afraid of how you might react. But I wanted to open up this dialog of critical thinking. Racism is FAR more complex than the way I present it in the chapter and it is from a certain perspective that I have placed the POV in. I DO NOT agree with every line of thought presented. I personally agree with Bolin and feel all should be treated equally, WITHOUT QUESTION. While I'm typing this and looking at that orange "Publish" button, I hesitate and consider if I should take out the first four paragraphs of this chapter, if the subject is too much for you to read or handle. If the section did make you uncomfortable, I am genuinely sorry.
But I am curious to see how you would react when presented with this comparison. If you would like to tell me your thoughts on the comparison in a comment, I would love to read them and see what you think about it. If you want to cuss me out for not including a perspective or tell me I'm a dumb biotch who doesn't understand anything, that's cool. It's a free country or internet... whatever. Just don't use racial slurs. For those I haven't pissed off, thank you so much for reading and I hope my future chapters will continue to please you.
Love, The Author.