Note: This happened six years ago, when Marla just (finally, at almost 29 and after after 48 years! hehe) finished college and was planning on post graduate studies and Rafa just passed the bar. This could set the mood for their would-be first meeting, as both couldn’t quite forget the person they kissed that early summer night. So imagine their surprise when they finally meet again. Rafa wouldn’t tell her about it, and Marla would try to make herself believe Rafa isn’t that guy. Anyway, we’ll figure out how the rest of the story goes in the next posts. For the meantime, read on.
“Siguro mas madaling paniwalaan na hindi ka niya mahal, kaya ka nya iniwan. She never really loved you that’s why it was easy for her to grab that opportunity to pursue a career abroad. Pero isipin mo na lang kung ikaw ang nasa lugar nya, sa tingin mo ganun na lang kadali ang mag-decide?” the woman looked straight into his eyes before she downed what was left on her beer bottle.
Rafa stared at the woman beside her. Her eyelids were drooping but she kept on taking swigs from her beer. Her voice was slightly raised as if she cannot hear herself speak, and despite having had too much alcohol, she still spke clearly, she hasn’t even slurred her words. The only indication that she probably had too much to drink was her flushed cheeks, her hooded eyes, and the alcohol-induced boldness that was the reason why they were sharing a couch now. She did not look like she was out to pick up some guy. She wore white tank top under a pink hoodie, torn jeans and sneakers – a stark contrast to what every other woman in the room who were all dressed to impress. They are inside Artiste, an art gallery cum rock club located in oen of the quaint, quiet residential streets of Cubao.
They were sharing a couch, while around them were students or young professionals who were either drinking, talking or dancing to whatever song was blasting from the speakers. Others were singing along. A two hour set from a UP based rock band just wrapped up but instead of people leaving, more just kept coming in.
Everybody looked happy and ready to party til dawn. While he was there only because it was the unlikeliest place he was expevted to be seen... for the past two years, at least. Ever since he began dating radio jock and ramp model Zoey Andrada, he was often seen in upscale bars and clubs mostly in Makati or BGC.
He loved Zoey, so much that he has been planning on proposing to her for the past several months. They have been together for two and a half years.. His family loved her. The past years in law school had been great for him. Law school was toxic but knowing she’s around was enough to keep him inspired. He planned to propose the day after his oath-taking in May. He is twenty-eight and he thought he is ready enough to make that big leap towards marriage. Maybe in a year or so. He will soon start as a juniopr associate in one of the country's biggest law firms and was hoping that in two years, he would be starting a family as well. That is, until she told him the news.
An ooportunity of a lifetime came, and Zoey simply couldn’t let it pass. And as much as she loved him, she says, she just doesn’t think it’s enough for her to give up a once-in-a-lifetime chance like that. A modelling career with a top agency in New York. Who would pass up an offer like that? “And anyway,” Zoey said, You’re about to start your legal career. It’s been a wonderful 2 and a half years. I hate to leave the country, and you. But i just can’t let this thing go. You know I have longed for this. This is my dream.”
Those cold, distant, cruel words still haunt him, taunting him wherever he goes. And in each of those times he would hear those words spoken all over again, they felt like stabs aimed straight to his heart.
Zoey was his life. And now she’s gone.
It’s been 3 days since. He never even knew what day and time she was supposed to leave. She just called at 5 am one morning and was already standing on line to the check in counter of Delta Air.” I’m going, Rafa. You be good. Take care.”
Then she hung up, not even giving him the chance to speak. What a sad way to start a sunny day.
“Hindi naman basta-bastang mag-move on. Aba, that’s two and a half years, you say? Matagal din yun! Pero sa tingin mo ba, mas madali siyang kalimutan by taking comfort in that fact, na hindi ka niya mahal? Hindi naman yata patas yan.”
And he just poured out his soul to this drunk woman. He was quietly nursing his beer in that lcorner couch when she suddenly slumped beside him and asked him, looking at the bucket of beer on the table in front of him. “Ayos, ang dami nyan ah. Anong excuse mo?”
He knows exactly what she meant, but didn’t answer. She didn’t seem to mind, though, but then she started talking. She told him about the evils of holding back ones emotions, how it could lead to some serious heart disease, or insanity. It was crazy, she was crazy, yet he found her amusing. Before he knows it, he was already telling her his story, and now she is giving him one unsolicited advice after another. He wouldn’t normally listen nor ask anyone about what they thought of what he had just gone through. His family and friends knows that, but she didn’t look like she can be stopped from talking.
“i’m sure she loved you, pero siguro mas importante talaga sa kanya yung career nya. Pinili nya ang New York pero hindi ibig sabihin nun hundi ka nya mahal. It’s easy for us to blame other people for our misery, mas madaling magalit. Normal naman yun. Pero naman, hahayaan mo bang ganun ang pakiramdam mo sa nangyari forever? Nakakapangit maging bitter. Any negative feeling is a toxin.”
Rafa smiled. Her hand gestures as she spoke were a sight to behold. She was very animated. Her entire body was slumped on the couch, and it looks like she would doze off anytime. But the way she talked was enough to tell him that she was ready to listen if he wanted to pour out his woes all night.
“Wish her luck na lang. Then move on. Huwag ka nang maglasing dyan.”
She said, before straightening herself up and posed to get a beer bottle from his bucket. He wondered if it was okay to let her get another. She looked really sloshed.
“Pengeng isa ha, bayaran na lang kita…” she opened her sling bag and start rummaging through its contents. He caught her hand, a pair of soulful almond eyes looked up at him as he did so. Man…
“Huwag na. Treat ko na yan sa iyo for keeping me company.”
She kept looking up at him, her eyes struggling to stay alert and awake. Goodness, she’s got the prettiest eyes he’s ever seen! He never really noticed what she looked like because she kept looking around while she talked. But now that he got a closer look, he realized that she was very pretty.
“Thank you.” She slapped him on the arm before she took a swig from the bottle.
“You’re welcome.” he said, watching her. “Ikaw, ano’ng excuse mo?”
“Ako?” she pointed to herself. “I have two! One, finally today, I did not have to go to that evil job na ilang taon ko na ding tinatyaganag pasukan dahil sa, you know, poor lang ako eh. Kapit sa patalim ba. At ngayon, dahil sa second excuse kung bakit ako nandito ay iniwan ko na iyon. Yes!” she smiled widely, and raised her two arms, including the beer bottle she was holding.
He chuckled. “Good for you. At ano ang isa pang excuse?”
She stood up. “I am now a graduate of the University of the Philippines. Major in Political Science. Bow!” then she did a curtsy and bowed exaggeratedly that she nearly bent forward to the low table in front of them He stood up, caught her arm and steadied her.
“Wala…lasing ka na. Sino bang kasama mo?” he asked, still holding her.
Her hand crept up to his shoulder. “Chantal and eduard. Nandun sila.” She pointed to one spot in the club, but he couldn’t make out exactly to which table he was pointing at.
“Okay…tara, dalhin kita sa kanila…” he took the bottle she was still holding in one hand and placed it on the table, while still holding her in one arm.
“Wait, wait!” she said, raising an index finger. “I love that song! By Sting!”
Sting? He couldn’t quite make out what song it was because of the noise, but he knew to heart all of Sting’s songs.
She wants him so badly…Knows what she wants to be… Inside her there’s longing…This girl’s an open page…
It took him a moment before he realized she was singing. And her hands are on his shoulders. And she was looking up at him. She took a deep breath, before he gently pulled her back to the cpuch. When they were both seated, he tried to pry her hands off him.But she didn’t let go. Instead she kept singing.
And she has a lovely voice, earthy and gritty… slowly seeping into him.
Don’t stand so, don’t stand so close to me… Don’t stand so, don’t stand so close to me…
She leaned towards him, Rafa looked at her, inching closer and closer. He didn’t even know her name. But she was really lovely. And it’s not just the buzz that just kicked in to his system, caused by the alcohol. He could drown in those eyes.
Don’t stand so, don’t stand so close to me… Don’t stand so, don’t stand so…
In an instant his lips claimed hers. Gently, tenderly at first, as he tasted her sweetness, combined with a little alcohol. He could feel her one hand holding on to his shoulder. and her other hand gently caressing his neck. That touch was slowly bringing him to the edge. And the kiss became hotter, harsher, as if he was ready to devour her. She made no objections, as she tried to match it by trying to mimic the movement of his lips. That drove him crazier. And as he felt her hands gently massaging his shoulder and neck, he slowly pushed her away. Her hooded eyes seemed to not want to let go.
“Baby, we should get you out of here.” He said, a realization rushing through him. This isn’t right. As much as he has been enjoying the kiss, he couldn’t do it to her.
“Okay.” She simply nodded as he helped her up.
He led her towards the back exit, straight to the parking area where his car was. When he had just opened the door to the passenger seat, he suddenly remembered he hasn’t paid for his drinks yet. He cursed.
The woman now had her arms around his waist, and she looked like she could no longer keep herself up. She carefully helped her get to the front seat.
“Listen… “ he gently patted her face. She suddenly opened her eyes, looked straight at him.
“Miss, uh, babayaran ko lang ang inorder ko. Pagbalik ko, uuwi na tayo, okay? I mean, ihahatid kita sa inyo. May ID ka ba dyan?” he pointed to her bag. She just nodded. “Cool! Pagbalik ko, hanapin natin ang ID mo at ihahatid na kita sa inyo, okay?”
“Okay…” She nodded again, her eyes looked a bit confused.
“Ayos! Sandali lang ako.” He looked around and saw a couple of bouncers helping one group get their drunk friend inside a car. He waved one over.
"Boss, pakibantayan naman muna sya. Ise-settle ko lang ang bill ko. Sandali lang.” the burly guy just nodded and he ran towards the club, straight to the bar cashier.
When he was done, he quickly made his way back to the parking lot, only to be told by the bouncer: “Iniuwi na ng mga kaibigan nyo yung girlfriend nyo, sir. Sina Chantal and Eduard daw sila.”
He just stared at the guy. He couldn’t quite process what he said, just yet.
“May ibinilin ba sila?” he asked stupidly.
“Wala naman, sir. May kailangan pa po ba kayo?” the bouncer asked.
“Wala na. Sige, salamat.” He said before he walked to his car, still in a daze. His chest was heaving.
God, i didn’t even know her name!