It was another morning again and the first instinct I got after waking up was to head straight to the bathroom. Without glancing in the mirror or even fixing my hair, I opened my bedroom door, yawning.
“Good morning,” I heard a guy’s voice.
My eyes flew open and there I saw Elliot sitting by the counter, reading a newspaper and having coffee. I knew my cheeks turned red instantly. I was pretty sure my mouth was opened so big my fist could have fitted inside. Damn, even Elliot’s big man hand could have fitted
I immediately straightened my hair and crossed my arms. I wasn’t wearing a bra. How stupid, Bobby. How could you forget you’re living with a guy?
“G—g, good morning,” I stammered and forced a smile. If I were a hermit crab, I was already hiding in my shell.
Reaching the bathroom couldn’t get any faster. I practically sprinted across the flat. The moment I shut the door, I quickly stood in front of the mirror to check out how much I embarrassed myself back there. The experience was horrifying. My hair looked like a bird’s nest, my face was pale, and my eyes have trolley-sized bags under them. I had always wondered how actresses woke up in the morning looking like they went straight out of a magazine in the movies.
I was sure Elliot thought I was a zombie. I grunted and glanced at the wall clock. It was just 7:30 in the morning, I wondered why he was already dressed up, ready for school.
By the time I was done getting ready, it was already 8:30. Yep, 1 whole hour in the bathroom. I’m a girl, please understand. I went out, looking more like a human now than how I looked like before entering the bathroom. I was wearing the usual: jeans and an oversized top.
I was expecting to see nobody in the living room because Elliot usually leaves for school at 8:15 but there he was lounging at the couch, guitar on his lap and a pencil between his lips. He was also holding some music sheets in his hands.
“Thought you transformed into a mermaid or have drowned in there,” he said casually, standing up. I watched him put his guitar in the bag and keep his sheets away.
“Girls like to take their time,” I replied and started towards the fridge. I suddenly got thirsty.
I got myself a glass of water while Elliot headed to the door. He was just about to step out when he suddenly stopped.
“I’ve never met a girl who snored that loud,” he glanced at me and smirked. Then he went out and shut the door.
I almost dropped the glass I was holding on the floor. I DO NOT SNORE!
I was muttering to myself like a complete psycho as I stomped my way down the streets.
“I can’t believe he said that! I never snored in my life.” I mumbled, just loud enough for people not to hear I was talking to myself.
I was thinking hundreds of ways of murdering Elliot as I walked to school. After last night, I was kind of hoping a thank you from him or a change in his behavior. Not that I expected but I was just hoping.
I knew it was his fault why my dark circles had been getting worse. The rumors, the flat, the annoying little attraction because he looked so darn gorgeous. Everything was entirely his fault!
I thought London was going to be an escape because it was an extraordinary city with lots of beautiful things going on. I never thought my escape from my heartaches about Andrew was going to be in the form of Elliot. I was so busy trying my best for him not to get under my skin that I actually almost forgot I had a best friend back in America.
I stopped just before crossing the street and looked to my left. Great. No cars. I took one step forward, no more like stomped one foot forward, and the world suddenly become a blur as if my whole was vacuumed backwards. Then my back crashed into something hard—no, someone’s chest.
“I didn’t know not looking at where you’re heading was a hobby,” the voice said, his breathe warm against the back of my neck.
I knew whose voice this was. Deep, husky, Elliot.
His hands gripped both sides of my shoulders and I was leaning back into him. Like really leaning back. I quickly got off his hands and stood up straight.
“You’re supposed to look right,” he looked down at me. My 5 foot 5 height was a bit short compared to his height.
“I—I know.” I stepped back a bit. We were standing so close our shoes were almost touching.
He snorted. “Didn’t seem like it.”
I rolled my eyes and looked at him. Did he really have to snort? “I know. I just…forgot,” I said and turned around. “But thank you,” I glanced behind my back. I had to get away as quickly as possible if I didn’t want him to see a tomato red version of my face.
I had been walking for about 5 minutes already and I had been feeling a lot like weird for the last 5 minutes. Elliot and I were technically walking to school together. Well, we weren’t together-together. Just technically. He was probably a foot or 2 behind me.
I tried my best to ignore him and kept walking. But after a couple more minutes and LAA was nearing, I turned left--not really the route to the school or to my building. Well, I was tired of the rumors. If people would see us walking somewhat together to school again, I didn’t know what would happen next. I was thankful though that all I had received was strange looks. No one had come up to me yet and actually sort of bully me. I heard those things seemed to happen.
When I had walked far enough, I discreetly looked back. There I saw Elliot walking straight ahead—to the right direction where our Academy was. I stopped and turned around, following him with my eyes. Then I walked to the side and pressed my back to the brick wall.
I took deep breathes after another. I hadn’t noticed I was almost not breathing for the last 10 minutes or so. I made a mental note not to do that ever again. Elliot couldn’t walk behind me like that ever again. It’s rather me walking behind him where I could make a 10-feet distance between us.
“Hi, Chloe,” I high-pitched voice said behind our backs.
Chloe and I were taking shots around the campus park for our Exploring Photography subject. Our professor didn’t show up today but he left a note behind and a list of tasks to do.
Chloe took the camera off her face and turned around. There I saw the girl who probably owned the voice.
From the music department. Definitely. She was wearing black eyeliner, ripped jeans, black leather jacket, and a messy bun. It was badass outfit but her beautiful face was nothing short of angelic, even if she was wearing heavy makeup and she pulled it all off.
“Oh, Hi Suzy,” Chloe put on a sweet smile but I knew it wasn’t genuine. Her eyes weren’t smiling.
“How are you?” Suzy gleefully asked. Her eyes were all focused on Chloe as if I was invisible.
“Great! Great. Oh this is my friend, Bobby,” Chloe pulled me towards her and put her arm around me.
“Hi,” I smiled at her and offered my hand.
Suzy didn’t take it immediately. She looked at my face sternly down to my hand. I thought I was going to embarrass myself offering my hand like that but she eventually thought of taking it. Thank goodness.
“Suzy,” she introduced herself as we shook our hands. She smiled at me but turned to Chloe immediately as if I wasn’t worthy of her sweet smile.
“How are you and Daniel?”
“Oh we’re together. Together then, together now,” Chloe nodded and crossed her arms, still smiling though.
“That sounds lovely. How about Elliot?” the eagerness in her voice was too obvious.
“Elliot is fine, I think? But I’m pretty sure you don’t have to ask me about him, you guys are in the same department.” The smile on Chloe’s face never left.
“Yeah, well. You know Elliot. Mysterious Elliot,” Suzy shook her head. Smile also not leaving her face.
They were both smiling like Barbie dolls and it was sort of getting awkward for me.
“Tell me about it,” Chloe replied quickly. “Well then if you’ll excuse us, we have tasks to do.”
“Of course. Then I’ll see you around,” Suzy waved a hand goodbye and walked away.
Chloe turned to me. The smile on her face no more. Then she shook her head and rolled her eyes.
“Okay, what was that for?” I arched a brow and laughed.
“The girl or the rolling of the eyes?”
“Uhm. Both?”
“I’ve never liked her,” she replied, crinkling her face. “She has this little obsession for Elliot which was annoying. She’d talk sweetly, be friendly, smile, and everything like that but I knew she was all faking that just to get Elliot’s attention. It all started when Olivia transferred.”
“How do you know she’s faking all that?”
“Honey, Suzy is the kind of girl who sticks to her crew. I know she only talks to me because Daniel is my boyfriend and Elliot is my friend. She’d never talk to me if not because of those guys.” She rolled her eyes.
“And it was pretty clear she doesn’t like me,” I laughed.
“Don’t worry about it.” Chloe grasped my arm. “Let’s just go and take some photos.”
The time difference between London and California was more of a hassle than I thought it was going to be. I hadn’t talked to anybody in America on the phone yet but I had been exchanging emails with people—mostly with Mom and Andrew.
She said the pie business was doing great. She had a new recipe, which she called Strawberry-Basil Pie. I had heard of this flavor combination before but I just could never imagine those two contrasting flavors in my mouth. She said it was a hit though. I remembered one time she experimented with combining tomato and chocolate. It was a nightmare.
Rocky had also been sending me Snapchats of his silly faces. I missed him more for every one that he sent. I still couldn’t believe how a 10-year-old knew how to use these advanced technology gadgets. Oh well, the world had completely changed.
Andrew, on the other hand, had been emailing me about what was up. Of course, he and Amanda were going strong. It was bittersweet news. Anyway. He said he started learning to play the piano. Which I thought was weird. I asked why but all I got in the end was a another crack in my already broken heart. He said he was learning to play it so he can compose a song for Amanda. Great. I had always dreamed of having another person write a song for me. I had thought about what must it feel like. But I guess I would never get to experience feeling that.
Actually, I didn’t even know if I would ever have someone like me. Like fall in love with me kind of thing. It was just that I was turning 20 in a couple of months and I had never had a boyfriend in my life. Not even one boy had a crush on me. Okay, there was this boy back in freshman high school but that didn’t count, right?
Cupid, why won’t guys notice me? I wasn’t particularly ugly. Mom told me I was beautiful. But I knew it was her job to tell me that. Hmm, Andrew had also told me I was beautiful—countless times. Well, he did so whenever I was PMS-ing and crying my eyeballs off because I felt like a cow.
I had been waiting. Waiting and waiting until that one guy showed up in front of me and tell me how much he loved me. I know. I was sort of a hopeless romantic. Darn myself.
So back to the problem, maybe I wasn’t ugly but I probably wasn’t pretty enough to be noticed. I mean whom was I kidding? I was a brunette, but not the kind of sexy hair mixed with other shades of color. Mine was just brown and black. How exciting was that? And my blue eyes could sometimes look too big. I even tried dying my hair platinum blonde one time because I thought my blue eyes would look good with that hair color. Well, it was just a disaster. I did a test in a little bunch of hair behind my ears to check it out first and it just fell of. Yes, that whole bunch of blonde hair just fell off. It freaked me out so much I never touched another box of hair dye again in my life.
It was past 11 in the evening already but sleep still hasn’t dawned on me yet. My flat mate was also still outside. Well, it was a Friday night. He should be in some kind of club or college party. Or he could be with, what’s her name again? Oh yeah. Or he could be with Olivia.
Then something bit me. Why were people calling me the new Olivia anyway. I rolled my eyes. Just because I kind of replaced Olivia’s seat at lunch doesn’t mean I actually replaced her, right? Whatever.
I was sitting like an Indian on the carpet in the living room, my back was to the door and I was facing the giant window. If weren’t for this big window, I would almost feel lonely and alone. Or maybe it was just depressing because I was hoping to get a BFF slash roomie here in the UK. Elliot clearly would never be that.
I stared at the beautiful view outside. Then I remembered the shots I had been taking every time I headed back to the flat for the past days. I grabbed my laptop and the camera from my room and sat back to where I was sitting in the living room. I waited for the memory card to load, excited to see the shots in a bigger screen. I also plugged in my earphones and listened to Ed Sheeran. I loved all his songs. Too bad I couldn’t relate to any of it. Almost couldn’t relate to any of it.
My eyes twinkled when the pictures came out. There was a photo of a boy who was probably learning how to bike, a man waiting outside the iconic red telephone box, and more shots of people. One photo did capture my attention the most though. It was a photo of two children. A girl and a boy. They were in their uniforms and were probably around 12 years old. They were sitting on a bench park and were both staring at the sky. Their faces were filled with so much joy I almost felt happy just by looking at them.
I couldn’t remember anymore when I smiled like that. Andrew and I were just like the two children in the photo when we were kids. But time ran up to us and I developed these stupid feelings for him. The next thing I knew were tears falling down my face when he started going out with Amanda…my heart in pieces when they finally got together.
I was happy that he ended up with Amanda. I mean, she was an amazing girl. But as much as I wanted to be 100% happy for them, I just couldn’t. It was amazing though, how I managed to put a mask on for two years.
I felt a lump forming in my throat. No, Bobby. You can’t cry. Not anymore. The tune of Ed Sheeran’s melodramatic song wasn’t helpful.
I closed my eyes to take a deep breath and push back the tears that was pooling my eyes. But I shot them open when I felt something warm beside my left cheek. I quickly turned my face to the left, my lips an inch away from Elliot’s face.